Chapter 494 - Moving Forward

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"Correct, as I understand it, the subconscious is tricked to not know what is going on. None of us really understand how it works since the AI did most of the fine-tuning, but the subconscious must think that it is a vivid dream."

"We all know that. Gengxin, what are you getting at?" Joren asked, not needing another recap on just how much he didn't know about the thing he was responsible for. 

"I am getting at the difference between a lucid dream and a vivid one. I suspect Eldrian is inching closer to the former."

Ignoring that the game was more like a lucid dream for players, the two nodded as the analogy at least helped them understand. 

"What about his increased brain activity?" Joren asked, throwing up the data on his mounted monitor normally used in such discussions to make sharing data easier. 

"That isn't what interests me the most. What I find strange is this jump in his heart rate here, and also here. In his meditation, I assume he likely visited his soul again. And he must have found something strange and shocking at these times."

"And here, his body also seemed to become very active. Even increasing all his bodily functions, but it only lasted for a few minutes. So I can't really say if it was a subconscious reaction from the shock he discovered here, or if it implies something more."

"We'll ask him when he comes out. Since he seems to be stable there is no need to pull him out right now for answers. But, I am still curious about brain activity."

"These reading don't mean much, where is the footage of his brain's activity?"

It took Joren a moment to find that, like an MRI it showed which parts of Eldrian's brain were active, starting at the moment of meditation, a smooth video through the entire two hours.

"Yes, indeed. These parts shouldn't be that active, it should be impossible for them to show such activity."

"Shouldn't everything be impossible to be as active as it is shown here?" Constantin asked, from his little knowledge it seemed like Eldrian's brain was like a bulb of light instead of a brain. 

"True, but these in particular normally regular things like his respiratory system. It shouldn't show this much activity. And yes, the rest of the activity is also abnormal. It is almost like he had a conversation with himself. But he doesn't have a dissociative identity disorder."

"However, the most shocking part is how that both of his bodies were being regulated."

"That's always the case," Joren replied with a questioning frown. 

"Not like this, this... This is groundbreaking."

***

Eldrian, of course, had no idea what exactly Miracle knew, nor how much what had happened had sent them reeling, searching for answers. 

No, he was focused on trying to figure things out himself. And most importantly, figuring out what he could say and share, and what he shouldn't. 

This was hard, especially when he felt like he needed to ask for advice. 

'Ceph, thanks for making the link.'

'Sure, but you really need to figure out how to do that. I just barely managed to figure out you wanted me to do so.'

'Next time, need to first sort out the damage I caused.'

'What on earth even happened?'

Eldrian did his best to keep his smile from growing as he started sharing everything with Ceph. He was eternally thankful that there was someone with whom he could talk to in private. Someone he didn't need to hide anything from. 

'Was it like talking to that god... Ziraili?'

'Not quite, she still needed me to at least finish my thoughts. And, similarly to how we are talking, I could hide some thoughts from her.'

'Oh, I see. And with your soul?'

'Everything I think, it already knows. Many times it even replied to my thoughts before I even actually knew what they were going to be. It was quite confusing.'

'How did the ice-?'

'I became angry at failing to keep control, and I think... I think that part of me feared myself, or the anger. I know it acted in self-defense, but I don't understand why.'

"Eldrian, can you share anything else?" Pelaros asked after giving Eldrian some time to open up on his own, which it seemed wasn't going to happen. 

"Yeah, I won't attempt that again anytime soon."

"Meaning? You know how to attempt it again?" Pelaros asked as shivers covered his entire centaur body. Even causing his coat to stand on ends as he wondered just what kind of destruction Eldrian could cause. 

"Indeed, I finally figured out how to control my auras. But I am not ready to attempt that again, since I found that losing control is much more dangerous than I first believed."

"What do you mean?" Vivian asked with concern clear in her crystal clear green eyes, eyes Eldrian sometimes wished he could just get lost in for hours on end. 

"Pelaros once warned me that with the aura of wrath I might be lost in anger. Never able to come back. I assume the aura of tranquility should have a similar effect, but how I touched it won't ever cause a similar cause."

"Then, what is the danger?" Pelaros asked, and as he did he turned to the ice which still stood strong in the midday sun. Not showing any signs of melting. "This, was from losing control?"

"Yes, and how I saved the others as you so magnificently retold at the gala was another time of me losing control. That time, however, I managed to target it. I have no idea how I did, and if I hadn't I would have killed Sodren and Evale..."

"Yes, I won't attempt controlling my auras again any time soon," Eldrian affirmed.

"Yet, you are clearly going to attempt it again. When, and why?"

Eldrian smiled, "Indeed, and the when will be when I am confident in managing my emotions. Until then, trying to do anything with my auras will just lead to me getting lost in the emotions, or losing control. Neither are situations I wish to happen."

Eldrian wasn't quite sure which situation would be worse. Losing himself in his emotions could lead to him becoming a savage and possibly hurting those he cared for. However, losing control would mean everyone close to him at the time would die. 

Both were scary thoughts, and situations he'd rather not touch unless absolutely necessary or he was certain they wouldn't happen. 

Nodding, Pelaros finally understood. "Then, let us go and see what the damages are."

Eldrian flinched hearing this, shaking his head he just hoped it wasn't too much.

...

"Surprisingly, not much damage was done. However, the mana crystals powering the arrays were all drained. It will cost around three hundred fifty gold to replace them." Pelaros said, estimating closest he could. 

There were around ten different arrays, and each was powered by a finger-sized mana crystal. Then, there was another making sure the arrays did not clash, it took another two crystals. 

The arrays weren't made as a formation, they didn't increase each other's strength. Instead, they were all separate. One to regulate temperatures, another to light all the magic lights... Of course, there were a few focused on defense, but that was only a few of the arrays. 

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