CH 10

Chapter 10: Kazemiya Kohaku’s Family Situation

Humans were creatures that were constantly comparing themselves to others.

For example, even at school, we were compared to others in every possible way, whether it be in terms of studies, athletics, appearance, or behavior. Moreover, the comparison appears in the form of grades, a clear number. School was the place where the concept of comparison took shape.

However, this was something inevitable.

When many people gathered together, differences emerged, and it was natural for them to be compared.

The question was, who would they be compared to? Who would be the target of the comparison?

I—Kazemiya Kohaku, hadn’t always been blessed with comparisons in that sense.

Kuon. Her real name was Kazemiya Kuon. She was a very popular singer-songwriter and my big sister, especially among middle and high school students.

Her voice captivated many people, and the songs she had written and composed were all big hits.

When she was chosen to sing the theme song for a famous movie, it caused a boom to the point of being called a social phenomenon.

My sister was always excellent at everything from an early age.

She was good at everything, both academically and athletically, and her looks were outstanding.

She had a unique sense of style, a singing voice that charmed everyone, and was very popular.

She got a lot of love from our mom.

She was always, always surrounded by admiration.

While I—was always, always discouraged.

“When Kuon was your age, she could solve problems like this in no time.”

“Third place…Kuon would have won this competition.”

“Haah…with such a mediocre voice, you can’t even hold a candle to Kuon.”

Her sister is more amazing.

She was able to do it because Kuon was her sister.

It’s hard to believe that they’re siblings.

I was always and always get discouraged.

Somewhere along the line, Mom stopped expecting me. By that time, Mom was extremely busy as a manager supporting my sister’s singing career.

“You are free to do as you please. But please, don’t be a drag for Kuon.”

Mom wanted only that one thing from me.

She stopped looking at me…….No. Wrong.

My mom never looked at me from the beginning.

Kazemiya Kohaku, a human being, was not needed by anyone and was not even looked at by anyone.

“It looks like Kuon is concentrating, so go out and have some fun. I’ll give you some money.”

A 10,000 yen bill was handed to me. Clutching the 10,000 yen bill, which was a huge amount of pocket money for a junior high school student, it became a normal thing for me to spend time alone, wandering around outside or in a store somewhere.

Moreover, as my sister became more and more famous, more and more people came up to me for her.

I was already sick of it. So I ran away from my family. I began to avoid the place called home. I ran away from the people who approached me. They would approach me with their own expectations, then they would be disappointed and hurt me.

“What are you doing out so late at night? You’re not doing anything weird, are you?”

And ironically, once I ran away from my family and home, I started having more conversations with my mom. I wasn’t sure if I could call it a conversation, but at least there were more occasions for her to say something to me.

“It doesn’t matter. It’s up to me what I do.”

Even though she was so busy that she didn’t even come home much.

All she did was put some money on the table and told me to eat something with it.

“I told you right, don’t be a drag for Kuon.”

The most important worry in my mom’s mind was always my sister.

Every once in a while I would come home and she would complain to me not to bother my sister or do anything that would drag her down. It was at that time I was living such a life.

“Hello, mom?”

I overheard Narumi’s call by chance.

Narumi Kouta, a classmate and a regular at the same family restaurant.

We had never exchanged words, but I was aware of him as a regular customer.

And although I didn’t mean to eavesdrop on the phone conversation, I learned that he was not getting along with his family as well as I was.

“Are you on bad terms with your family?”

Before I knew it, I found myself talking to him. I spoke to him and was inwardly flustered.

“……is that a question for me?”

“Who else is here?”

What am I doing? I, who had been defending myself to keep people away from me, was talking to them on my own. I found myself bewildered by this contradictory behavior.

As we talked, I learned that he was like me.

I learned that we were similarly running away from a place called home, from our families.

I felt……glad that there was someone else like that besides me. And it was only then that I realized that I had always found the alone time I spent at the store to be lonely.

—I’m Kohaku’s friend, but I don’t think I can heal your loneliness.

At that moment. The words of a friend, which had been said to me some time ago, came back to my mind.

“If so, I have a suggestion.”

Before I knew it, I made a suggestion to Narumi.

To spend time together in that restaurant. Not to spend time alone, but to spend time together.

I was nervous that he might reject my proposal. My heart was beating very loudly in my chest.

Besides…I can talk to Narumi, you know. Complain or something.”

“It’s all kinds of stuff. School stuff, personal stuff, family stuff, etc.”

“We just complain to each other and listen. We won’t go any further than that…what do you think?”

It was one word after another, like an excuse, like a desperate attempt to persuade him.

“Yup. I like it. It fits our stance.”

“I see. Then it’s settled.”

“Yes. It’s an alliance.”

“An alliance. That’s good.”

I think I was smiling.

It must have been because I was happy. I was relieved and relieved from the bottom of my heart.

Thus began the strange relationship between Narumi and myself, an alliance.

The time I spent with Narumi was comfortable. I no longer felt the loneliness and isolation I had felt so much.

We talked about trivial things. Talking about my family. We listened to each other’s complaints.

There was no sense of guilt there, no sense of being uncomfortable.

I could talk about my sister and my mom. I could vent my grievances.

I felt I had a place to stay other than home. For the first time, I found a place to stay.

That was all I needed. I was happy just to have a place to stay.

And yet.

“I hated it when people took ridiculous rumors to heart and said bad things about my friends…and it made me angry. …Ah, I see. I was angry because people were saying bad things about Kazemiya.”

Narumi was angry.

A bad rumor about me that I had neglected. They were not necessarily false, but they were not true either. Narumi was angry at me for a rumor that had some malicious intent blended into it.

No one had ever been angry with me for my sake.

If my mom get angry, it was for the sake of my sister. In order not to cause trouble for my sister.

She didn’t look at me, she didn’t even see me.

But Narumi looked at me. He looked at me and got angry for my sake.

“…By the way, about the rumors. In case you’re wondering, I don’t do anything other than going home from this store at night. I stop by the convenience store once in a while, but I don’t go out to play or anything like that. And…as for the rumor that I’m involved with some not-so-good people, I think that’s just because I was seen being scouted by the president of an entertainment agency. That guy was fancy looking.”

I even explained the truth of the rumors, which I hadn’t particularly intended to mention.

I didn’t want to ruin this cozy moment, so I shouldn’t have mentioned it.

I had no intention of making such excuses.

“I see. Well…I guess it is something like that. That’s the truth of the rumor, huh? You’re keeping this rumor alive just to cut down on the number of people who come to you for your sister, right?”

“You can guess that much. You’re good.”

He was looking at me.

I was happy, glad, and embarrassed and it was warmer than I had expected it to be.

“If I put it in the context of family matters, I could guess it. The nightlife thing was somewhat predictable…and the scouting thing was unexpected, but it wasn’t particularly surprising.”

“Not surprising?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if Kazemiya got a scout or two.”

“….What do you mean by that?”

“I mean, that’s how attractive you are.”

“…..well, that’s.”

Narumi was a man who would say outrageous things without hesitation.

However, I also get the sense that his words came from the fact that he saw me as a human being.

“You know, Narumi. Do you hate the fact that there are rumors about me?”

“I never liked those rumors in the first place, and now that I’m friends with Kazemiya, I just don’t like them anymore. I understand that it’s self-defense for you, so I’ll try to be patient from now on.”

“I see. Got it.”

Narumi looked at me. He heard the rumors about me and got angry.

That meant that I was no longer alone.

I didn’t mind having strange rumors spread about me, but Narumi might not.

Kazemiya Kohaku wasn’t the only person who should be satisfied.

How should I act for the sake of those around me who care about me?

I kept thinking about this while eating my grape parfait.