CH 46.3
Before Ning Wan could say anything, Fu Zheng's voice rang out. "A man who says he'll support you all his life, advocates for you not to go to work, and discourages your enthusiasm to reenter into society isn't being responsible at all."
"Why not?" Shu Ning retorted, almost without thinking. "Those few years when I was at home with my daughter and didn't work, he was so good to me. He never hit me... To be honest, our problems began when I went back to work. He felt like I wasn't devoted to our family and begun feeling dissatisfied... that's why I thought of resigning. I thought that if I resigned, the conflict between us would disappear, and anyway his salary was enough to support the family. Who would have thought... Even though I quit my job, his disposition seems to have completely changed for the worse. It seems that we can never go back to the past..."
Saying so, Shu Ning began to cry again. Her voice was full of pain and frustration. "Had I known this would happen, I would never have handed in my resume at all…"
Sadly, even Shu Ning didn't realize that she had been completely brainwashed by her husband. She had created the mold for her own future - she was an outstanding woman with the exact same education as her husband, and she had worked so hard to get her PhD. Why did it have to be her who had to take care of the family while her husband could both enjoy a stable home life while advancing his career?
"Is it the law that a woman is in charge of the home and a man is in charge of the outside world? You're just as excellent as he is, so why can't you have your goals1? You've never done anything wrong. The one who's in the wrong is your husband." Ning Wan's chest hurt from anger, but unexpectedly, Fu Zheng was a step ahead than her. His tone was serious and cold, but every sentence was sharp and reasonable. "You have the right to choose how you want to live your life. Any man who needs you to sacrifice your career and interests to fulfill his needs is not a good match. Marriage is a partnership, never one side's sole sacrifice. In your situation, you're obviously able to take care of both career and family. You're already the one taking on more work in the family. Why should he be allowed to lose his temper and hit you just because it isn't going the way he wants?"
Shu Ning hesitated. "I can understand him sometimes losing his temper. After all, a man is always under great pressure in the outside world. When his performance is appraised the requirements are strict, and the workplace has a banquet culture. Although he doesn't like doing it, he still has to attend all sorts of dinners and things, and he often drinks to the point of throwing up before getting home. It's not like he wants to. It's just that working life is exhausting for a man. Although I'm the one staying home with the child, I'm actually living a pretty carefree life and not worrying about my livelihood..."
Fu Zheng interrupted Shu Ning with a sneering laugh. "Did he tell you that?"
Shu Ning nodded. "Un. Every time he loses his temper and loses control of himself, he will explain while apologizing. Men really have it hard in modern society…"
"Then is it not difficult for a woman?" Ning Wan burst out, finally unable to contain herself. "Why do only his difficulties matter? Having the man work outside and the woman work within the home is his own choice, so the exhaustion and pressure he must bear outside the home is his cross to carry2, and his suffering is to be dispelled on his own, rather than venting it on his family. Who of us ordinary people living in this world isn't exhausted? Can he share the hurt and pain of childbirth? Did you take it out on him when you had a baby? Did you beat him?"
From Shu Ning's gentle appearance, she didn't seem to be a woman who easily flew into a rage. It is precisely because she was so gentle and accommodating that Yu Feiyuan had such a hold on her.
"Saying that stress is why he lost his temper and beats you is nothing more than an excuse."
Though she was clearly the victim and the one seeking help, Shu Ning spoke up for Yu Feiyuan instead. "He just can't control himself sometimes. Before I went back to work, he really was a good man…"
"Honestly, a man who can't even control his emotions well can't be called a good man. Who in this world doesn't have to endure stepping on some hot coals? If he has a bad temper and is angry at the company, why doesn't he confront his boss about it instead of taking it out on his innocent, weaker wife? To put it bluntly, this kind of man is a bully, who threatens the weak and fears the strong. How is that in any way a good man?"
Shu Ning bit her lip. She obviously wanted to say something, but in the end nothing came out but more tears.
Seeing her like this, Ning Wan had no other alternative but to take out a form. "Fill out this legal consultation service form. If you can, try and get a job, so that it will be easier for you to fight for custody. If your husband is unwilling to negotiate, you'll have to sue for divorce, and if it goes to the courts you'll need to be prepared for a long-term battle. It's best for you to leave him as soon as possible. For one, a long-term separation proves that there is no longer anything emotional between you. Secondly, separation is safer for you due to his domestic abuse. If you have no house to live in, first go to a hotel."
As if she had grasped onto a lifeline, Shu Ning nodded her head.
"There's also the injuries on your face. It looks to me as though only simple disinfection was done. Can you call up the police and do an injury appraisal? Although your husband likely won't admit that it was due to his beating, saving such evidence will be useful to us in the future. Would you like us to accompany you?"
Shu Ning shook her head. "No. I can do it myself."
"After that, I will prepare an agency contract3 for you. If you don't find any issues with it, sign it. Then I'll make you a list. You'll need to bring me both the original and the photocopies of all the things on the list, including the marriage certificate, details of the common properties in your marriage, real estate, and all evidence that could prove the breakdown of your relationship. If you had proof of past domestic violence, even better."
Shu Ning filled out the form, left her contact information, and thanked Ning Wan and the other two over and over again, her eyes still red from crying. Only then did she once again put on her hat and sunglasses, wrap herself up in her scarf, and opened the door to leave.
When compared to how open she had been just now, the moment the locked door opened, Shu Ning returned to that cowering, shrinking woman, wary and insecure about her surroundings, terrified of being hurt at any time.
Ning Wan watched her go and let out a sigh. Just like her mother, Shu Ning could be leading a much better life. The only difference was that Shu Ning had at least decided to make a change, while her mother...
Chen Shuo knew a little about Ning Wan's family situation and was well aware of what domestic violence cases meant to her. "Ning Wan, I'll do this case with you," he said decisively.
Regrettably, Ning Wan shook her head. "First of all, you wouldn't find this case challenging; second, Fu Zheng was there when Shu Ning first came to consult, so he's more aware of the ins and outs. In addition, he spoke to Shu Ning quite a bit just now, so he obviously has his own thoughts on such cases. Since he has no previous experience handling divorce and family law, it will work out well for him to tag along. Overall it's more appropriate for him to be the one joining me on the case."
"But..." Chen Shuo didn't want to give away this opportunity to work alone with Ning Wan and perhaps even win her heart. He said hastily, "I haven't done a family law case before either, and I came here to the community precisely to do more down-to-earth cases like this. Fu Zheng is a new, and if you bring him along on this case he'll definitely struggle a little. On the other hand, I..."
"Lawyer Chen, just by listening you can tell that this case is going to be quite bleak. You just got better after speaking to Dr. Zhao, you should steer away from taking such depressing cases for now. They aren't good for you, and might cause you to relapse." Fu Zheng smilingly interrupted Chen Shuo. "Let me handle it."
……
Ning Wan had been feeling a little down due to thinking about her mother, but watching the positive energy and enthusiasm surrounding Chen Shuo and Fu Zheng, along with their mutual sympathy and profound friendship, she felt like genuine feelings still existed in the world. The connection between fellow humans were far more beautiful than conflict!
frostcrystal
When I first watched Tangled as a little girl, I was very confused as to why the witch was considered the bad guy. After all, I thought, she said she loved Rapunzel so much so surely that must be a good thing. Only now as an adult do I understand how subtle emotional abuse is, and actually it's extra horrifying that when I was a kid I thought that the witch must be a good parent just because she said "I love you".
"Why not?" Shu Ning retorted, almost without thinking. "Those few years when I was at home with my daughter and didn't work, he was so good to me. He never hit me... To be honest, our problems began when I went back to work. He felt like I wasn't devoted to our family and begun feeling dissatisfied... that's why I thought of resigning. I thought that if I resigned, the conflict between us would disappear, and anyway his salary was enough to support the family. Who would have thought... Even though I quit my job, his disposition seems to have completely changed for the worse. It seems that we can never go back to the past..."
Saying so, Shu Ning began to cry again. Her voice was full of pain and frustration. "Had I known this would happen, I would never have handed in my resume at all…"
Sadly, even Shu Ning didn't realize that she had been completely brainwashed by her husband. She had created the mold for her own future - she was an outstanding woman with the exact same education as her husband, and she had worked so hard to get her PhD. Why did it have to be her who had to take care of the family while her husband could both enjoy a stable home life while advancing his career?
"Is it the law that a woman is in charge of the home and a man is in charge of the outside world? You're just as excellent as he is, so why can't you have your goals1? You've never done anything wrong. The one who's in the wrong is your husband." Ning Wan's chest hurt from anger, but unexpectedly, Fu Zheng was a step ahead than her. His tone was serious and cold, but every sentence was sharp and reasonable. "You have the right to choose how you want to live your life. Any man who needs you to sacrifice your career and interests to fulfill his needs is not a good match. Marriage is a partnership, never one side's sole sacrifice. In your situation, you're obviously able to take care of both career and family. You're already the one taking on more work in the family. Why should he be allowed to lose his temper and hit you just because it isn't going the way he wants?"
Shu Ning hesitated. "I can understand him sometimes losing his temper. After all, a man is always under great pressure in the outside world. When his performance is appraised the requirements are strict, and the workplace has a banquet culture. Although he doesn't like doing it, he still has to attend all sorts of dinners and things, and he often drinks to the point of throwing up before getting home. It's not like he wants to. It's just that working life is exhausting for a man. Although I'm the one staying home with the child, I'm actually living a pretty carefree life and not worrying about my livelihood..."
Fu Zheng interrupted Shu Ning with a sneering laugh. "Did he tell you that?"
Shu Ning nodded. "Un. Every time he loses his temper and loses control of himself, he will explain while apologizing. Men really have it hard in modern society…"
"Then is it not difficult for a woman?" Ning Wan burst out, finally unable to contain herself. "Why do only his difficulties matter? Having the man work outside and the woman work within the home is his own choice, so the exhaustion and pressure he must bear outside the home is his cross to carry2, and his suffering is to be dispelled on his own, rather than venting it on his family. Who of us ordinary people living in this world isn't exhausted? Can he share the hurt and pain of childbirth? Did you take it out on him when you had a baby? Did you beat him?"
From Shu Ning's gentle appearance, she didn't seem to be a woman who easily flew into a rage. It is precisely because she was so gentle and accommodating that Yu Feiyuan had such a hold on her.
"Saying that stress is why he lost his temper and beats you is nothing more than an excuse."
Though she was clearly the victim and the one seeking help, Shu Ning spoke up for Yu Feiyuan instead. "He just can't control himself sometimes. Before I went back to work, he really was a good man…"
"Honestly, a man who can't even control his emotions well can't be called a good man. Who in this world doesn't have to endure stepping on some hot coals? If he has a bad temper and is angry at the company, why doesn't he confront his boss about it instead of taking it out on his innocent, weaker wife? To put it bluntly, this kind of man is a bully, who threatens the weak and fears the strong. How is that in any way a good man?"
Shu Ning bit her lip. She obviously wanted to say something, but in the end nothing came out but more tears.
Seeing her like this, Ning Wan had no other alternative but to take out a form. "Fill out this legal consultation service form. If you can, try and get a job, so that it will be easier for you to fight for custody. If your husband is unwilling to negotiate, you'll have to sue for divorce, and if it goes to the courts you'll need to be prepared for a long-term battle. It's best for you to leave him as soon as possible. For one, a long-term separation proves that there is no longer anything emotional between you. Secondly, separation is safer for you due to his domestic abuse. If you have no house to live in, first go to a hotel."
As if she had grasped onto a lifeline, Shu Ning nodded her head.
"There's also the injuries on your face. It looks to me as though only simple disinfection was done. Can you call up the police and do an injury appraisal? Although your husband likely won't admit that it was due to his beating, saving such evidence will be useful to us in the future. Would you like us to accompany you?"
Shu Ning shook her head. "No. I can do it myself."
"After that, I will prepare an agency contract3 for you. If you don't find any issues with it, sign it. Then I'll make you a list. You'll need to bring me both the original and the photocopies of all the things on the list, including the marriage certificate, details of the common properties in your marriage, real estate, and all evidence that could prove the breakdown of your relationship. If you had proof of past domestic violence, even better."
Shu Ning filled out the form, left her contact information, and thanked Ning Wan and the other two over and over again, her eyes still red from crying. Only then did she once again put on her hat and sunglasses, wrap herself up in her scarf, and opened the door to leave.
When compared to how open she had been just now, the moment the locked door opened, Shu Ning returned to that cowering, shrinking woman, wary and insecure about her surroundings, terrified of being hurt at any time.
Ning Wan watched her go and let out a sigh. Just like her mother, Shu Ning could be leading a much better life. The only difference was that Shu Ning had at least decided to make a change, while her mother...
Chen Shuo knew a little about Ning Wan's family situation and was well aware of what domestic violence cases meant to her. "Ning Wan, I'll do this case with you," he said decisively.
Regrettably, Ning Wan shook her head. "First of all, you wouldn't find this case challenging; second, Fu Zheng was there when Shu Ning first came to consult, so he's more aware of the ins and outs. In addition, he spoke to Shu Ning quite a bit just now, so he obviously has his own thoughts on such cases. Since he has no previous experience handling divorce and family law, it will work out well for him to tag along. Overall it's more appropriate for him to be the one joining me on the case."
"But..." Chen Shuo didn't want to give away this opportunity to work alone with Ning Wan and perhaps even win her heart. He said hastily, "I haven't done a family law case before either, and I came here to the community precisely to do more down-to-earth cases like this. Fu Zheng is a new, and if you bring him along on this case he'll definitely struggle a little. On the other hand, I..."
"Lawyer Chen, just by listening you can tell that this case is going to be quite bleak. You just got better after speaking to Dr. Zhao, you should steer away from taking such depressing cases for now. They aren't good for you, and might cause you to relapse." Fu Zheng smilingly interrupted Chen Shuo. "Let me handle it."
……
Ning Wan had been feeling a little down due to thinking about her mother, but watching the positive energy and enthusiasm surrounding Chen Shuo and Fu Zheng, along with their mutual sympathy and profound friendship, she felt like genuine feelings still existed in the world. The connection between fellow humans were far more beautiful than conflict!
frostcrystal
When I first watched Tangled as a little girl, I was very confused as to why the witch was considered the bad guy. After all, I thought, she said she loved Rapunzel so much so surely that must be a good thing. Only now as an adult do I understand how subtle emotional abuse is, and actually it's extra horrifying that when I was a kid I thought that the witch must be a good parent just because she said "I love you".
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