Chapter 6

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Chapter 6

Yuria’s face darkened at the child’s words, knowing what he was referring to as well as what he was thinking.

It was normal to clean then get dirty again, constantly repeating the cycle. Moreover, unlike most people who wouldn’t give it a second thought, the child thought just because his skin was dirty, his existence was also dirty. Maybe it was because he had never washed before so he was unaware of the concept of ‘washing’ itself. Therefore, the current situation would be shocking to the child, who’d never before had a bath.

Yuria was clueless as to what she could say to the child to reassure him. Such a small child wouldn’t understand even if she explained a hundred times that doing this strange new thing was normal.

That’s why Yuria debated carefully which words to use so the child would understand that it was never his fault. “Sweetie, you’re not dirty.”

“… It was shiny earlier, but it isn’t now.” The child did not readily accept Yuria’s words, still convinced the water had changed colours because of him.

It was expected a kid would get dirty and make a mess. This time was no different, it was something that normally would have already passed, but the child couldn’t figure out why his words were so painful once spoken.

Maybe it was because of the woman in front of him that it didn’t matter if anything else got dirty; however, he hoped he wouldn’t make Yuria dirty. Aside from her affection towards him, Yuria was a pretty, shiny person, and he didn’t want such a person to become dirty and ugly.

Yuria thought for a moment and said, “The water… isn’t dirty, but the world is.” Unable to understand, the child tilted his head. Nonetheless, Yuria continued, “Traces of the world that were buried on your body are washed off in the water like this.”

Still, the child could not understand Yuria’s words. “There were so many strange and amazing things in the world that when you combine them, it will become dirty like this.”

The child just nodded.

It was understandable that there are many amazing and strange things in the world. Only a short while ago, they were reflected in the eyes of the child. However, he couldn’t figure out why they were in the water now, nor why the water changed so much after.

“Everyone is like that. You count the traces of the world left on your skin, it’s proof we are living.”

He was wrapped in dust and grime – evidence of having lived a hard life. Therefore in Yuria’s eyes, the dirt was just traces the world had left behind. As a child who lived alone, imprints of the world had been etched onto his body, only now melting into the water, but how can she say it was simply dirt?

It was proof that he had lived fiercely.

“….” The child was silent, waiting for Yuria to speak.

“The world left marks on your skin, this is how they look after being washed away.”

“Why?” The child stared intently at Yuria.

“We still have a lot of life left to live, and it is too heavy to carry all the traces of the world, so you wash them off like this. Then the marks on our bodies will dissolve in the water and we continue living.” Yuria knew that as she spoke, the child wouldn’t understand her words properly. Nevertheless, she expressed it that way because she wanted the child to know that he would never be at fault for living, and shouldn’t believe that just because his body was dirty he was*. He doesn’t have to understand now, but she is sure that in time he will understand.

(T/N: *Implying that because your body is dirty then your soul/personality is also dirty, that you’re dirty inside out. )

“… Then, I am not dirty?” Yuria could barely breathe while hearing his words, though clumsy and unsure, he seemed to begin to understand her meaning. In turn, reassuring Yuria that the child no longer had a self destructive mentality.

“Of course. How can such pretty and pale hands like this be dirty?” Yuria nodded her head resolutely, without the slightest bit of hesitation. Her answer gave courage to the child, who looked at her with trembling eyes. She raised the child’s submerged hands as proof. Hands that were previously caked in dust and stained with muck now shone brightly. The child looked to his raised hands, staring at them in disbelief.

It’s strange.

They were just like clouds. Clouds on a sunny day – so white and clean. And… It was just like Yuria!

All of a sudden, his hands looked just like those of Yuria, who was infinitely pretty. His expression brightened at this newfound fact, the anxiety and worry that had weighed on his mind just a moment ago was lifted.

After washing the child, Yuria led the child out of the bathroom, and gently wiped off any of the remaining water on his body. A large, soft towel was wrapped around the child, causing him to tremble at the unfamiliar and awkward sensation.

Only his face was protruding from the towel. Then it covered his face. The child shook his head trying to escape from the towel, his hands floundering around trying to grab the towel. Yuria immediately collected the towel after drying off the child.

The veil covering the child was removed, letting the bright sunlight shine in, revealing silky black hair, and a pair of shining obsidian eyes. The child’s skin was white like milk, his facial features nestled so perfectly into his tiny face, making it impossible to look away. Yuria couldn’t even imagine how beautiful the child would become once he matured.

At the sudden disappearance of the towel, the child tilted his head and blinked in confusion. Yuria couldn’t help but smile, seeing his clumsy appearance with his arms still hanging in the air. His rosy face from the bath matched with his pale face, making him look just like a doll.

“Are you uncomfortable?”

The child didn’t answer; he’d never known what it was like to not be uncomfortable.

“I’m hungry now, shall we eat?”

The child did not answer this time either. He just wiggled his fingers and stared back at Yuria. A rumbling came from the child’s stomach, startled by the sound, his eyes opened wide and he reflexively covered his stomach. Then, pretending nothing happened he slowly turned his head and placed his gaze elsewhere. His ears flushed in embarrassment.

“I guess I’m very hungry. There’s thunder in my stomach,” Yuria said, having noticed the child’s embarrassed appearance, as if the sound came from her.

The child’s eyes turned to her in thought.

Obviously, the sound came from me, why is she saying it came from her?

The child hesitated to correct Yuria. In his past, he really had been beaten for various reasons. Sometimes just for staring at his meal, being unlucky, not crying, or… when his stomach grumbled. As such he couldn’t easily speak the truth of the matter.

Looking at the anxious child, Yuria kindly said, “Wait a minute, I’ll get it ready!”

At Yuria’s words the child stopped worrying, she was already headed to the kitchen before he had to decide. He stood quietly and watched Yuria prepare the food.

Yuria prepared a light meal for the child. Whenever she remembers the hungry child, she wants him to eat without reserve, but it could be burdensome since he hadn’t eaten properly in the past. Thus Yuria was planning to make porridge and a salad using the vegetables she grew in her small garden.

Soon the meal was ready.

“Sweetie?” Yuria called, thinking it was time to eat, and looked at the child rigidly standing in the distance.

She first put down a chair for the child before serving the food. Yuria had been living alone so there weren’t any children’s items. Even if he were to sit he wouldn’t be able to climb up the chair himself.

Yuria’s expression became regretful upon this realization, “I’m sorry. I didn’t take care of your needs.”

The child didn’t understand her meaning; why was she apologizing to him when she hadn’t done anything against him? All the people who’d hurt him never apologized. Yuria was strange and weird, but he didn’t hate her weirdness, it made her more likable.

I like the fluffy feeling I’m feeling right now, that might be why I don’t dislike her.

Soon after, Yuria hoisted the child up onto the chair, and she set out the prepared meal on the table.

“Do you know how to hold a fork?” Yuria asked carefully, worried his hands were too small to properly grip a fork.

The child was soon troubled; he’d never held a fork before. All he’d been allowed to do was crawl on the floor like an animal and eat the discarded food scraps.

Reading the hesitation on the child’s face, Yuria decided to feed the child herself. He can always learn later. There was no need to force the child to learn unfamiliar actions so suddenly, after finally finding a home.

When Yuria offered food to the child, he looked at it with a shocked expression, completely confused at what she was trying to do, and shuddered at the food presented.

Yuria looked at the child affectionately and said, “It’s okay to eat it.”

Despite her reassurance, the child did not take the food Yuria offered. He’d never experienced it before, so he didn’t know how to react. His stomach growled again, compelling him to accept the food from Yuria. The first step was always the hardest, afterwards, the child contentedly ate the food Yuria gave him.

Whenever he took another bite, his eyes would widen. He had ‘I’ve eaten something so good before’ written all over his face. He looked up after every mouthful, worried the food would disappear if he touched it.

Yuria looked on warmly at the child’s cute behavior. After the meal, Yuria and the child were left facing each other. It’d only been two days since they’d started living together. Until now, she’d been calling the child ‘sweetie’ but she couldn’t keep calling him that forever, she also hadn’t told him her name yet.

So before asking the child’s name, Yuria first introduced herself, “My name is Yuria. What’s your name sweetie?”

The child shook his head in reply. Even just when shaking his head, he looked like such a lovable child. He was such a cute and pitiful child that it was hard to understand his feelings at first glance.

Soon, the child opened his mouth.

“… Monster, trash… abandoned….”

That’s what the child was taught his name was.

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