Volume 1 - CH 8.1

[Ayana PoV]

[Why are you playing soccer, Towa-kun?]

I had once asked Towa because I was suddenly curious.

After graduating from elementary school and entering junior high school, Towa-kun continued to play soccer for a long time, so I was curious.

I could understand that he simply liked it because he seemed to enjoy it, but it seemed to me that there was another big reason.

[Why do I play…… because I like it?]

[Of course you do~]

It’s too simple, but it’s certainly true, and I agreed with him.

But I know that there is another big reason because I have seen Towa up until now.

Perhaps he gave up after staring at me so intently, he let out a small breath and continued his words.

[Uhm…… It’s because of my mother]

[Akemi-san?]

Akemi, that’s the name of Towa-kun’s mother.

I’ve only talked to her a little bit when I would go to Towa’s house with Shu, but we would often see each other when we went to watch soccer games, so naturally we hit it off.

She had a youthful appearance that made it hard to believe she had a junior high school son, but at first I had the impression that she was a bit flamboyant and scary, but after talking to her, I realized that she was a foolish parent who loved Towa very much.

[Towa. Heel-lift it out of there!]

[This is not like a manga, I can’t do it that well!]

Akemi was a lively woman, and I loved talking with her.

It may sound like an unfilial thing to say, but more than once I wished I had a mother like Akemi.

Akemi is such a wonderful woman, and she is the kind and strong woman that I would like to be like in the future.

[Uhm….I want you to keep it a secret, Ayana. Don’t tell my mother because it would be embarrassing.]

[I understand.]

Towa-kun scratched his cheeks and looked a little uncomfortable saying it.

I guess he was embarrassed about what he was about to tell me, but I wondered what the reason was.

As I waited patiently, Towa-kun spoke slowly.

[You know I don’t have a father in my house. ……he was in an accident a long time ago.]

[Ah, …….]

I had never heard any details about Towa-kun’s family situation, and I knew there was a reason because I had never seen anything about his father for a long time.

Neither Towa nor Akemi talked about his father at all, so I guessed and didn’t ask. …… I see, Towa’s father died in an accident.

[I’m sorry.]

I felt sorry for making him talk about such a thing, even if it was just out of curiosity.

I bowed my head and apologized, and Towa-kun patted me on the head and told me not to worry about it, but I felt really bad about this kind of topic.

[I’m going to continue. My mother loved my father very much. So it’s no surprise that she was very depressed, but because I was there, she recovered quickly …… I thought she was a really strong mother. But sometimes she would remember him, and I used to see her crying at night in front of the altar.]

Towa seemed to be having a hard time remembering what happened back then.

I wanted to tell him that we didn’t have to talk anymore, that he didn’t have to relive the pain, but I still wanted to know more about him.

[Mom certainly got back on her feet. But it is also true that her smile has decreased, and it was hard for me to see her trying to act so strong-minded like that.]

As far as I know, Akemi always has a beautiful smile on her face.

I don’t think her smile has decreased, but I have a hunch that what he is about to tell me is probably the reason why Akemi has smiled again.

[That’s when I happened to get interested in soccer a little bit. I joined a club and started practicing and playing in games. …… Then my mom started smiling more when she came to cheer me on. She started smiling again, as much as she did when my dad was around.]

[….. maybe that’s why]

Towa nodded and nodded.

[I probably wouldn’t have had to play soccer, but anyway, as a son, if my mom laughs when she sees me working hard, I want to keep playing, right? Well, I came to like soccer a lot while I was doing it, so it’s a win-win situation.]

[…… I see]

I have never tried to do anything for my family, and I can say with certainty that I never will.

I don’t see any value in the existence of a family, but I thought it was very precious and cool that Towa was trying to do his best for his mother.

[So …… that …… is what that’s about.]

Towa-kun seemed embarrassed to talk about this kind of thing, or maybe his face got redder and more shy as he got later in the day, but he was so cute like that, and my heart started pounding as I watched him.

Towa-kun expanded my world that day.

I have spent a lot of time with him since then, getting to know him better and better, and today I learned something about him that I didn’t know before.

[What’s wrong? Your face is all red……]

[Fufu, I guess so. Because I got to know even more of the wonderful parts of Towa-kun.]

I am embarrassed……I am really embarrassed, but I have no choice but to admit it now.

I love Towa-kun, I love him so much that I can’t help it.

I think I may have liked him from the day I first met him. But I will keep this feeling in my heart for now.

This is a very important time for Towa-kun, and that is why I will just stand by his side and support him.

[Speaking of, why are you using honorifics nowadays?]

[Oh, it’s because…]

As Towa-kun said, I mainly use honorifics these days.

The reason is simple, it’s like a protective wall towards my family, because even if they’re my family, if I speak to them in polite language, I can still see them as strangers.

I also ended up using polite language with Towa-kun, but I can remove it if I want to, but I’ve become used to it, so it might take a while to stop using it.

[…..So that’s the reason]

But since Towa-kun is very kind, there was no way I could honestly say that I wanted to keep my distance from my family members, so I felt sorry but I used a reason that sounded like it.

Then, he gave me a thumbs up and opened his mouth.

[I know there’s a lot going on, but I think honorifics are good for girls.]

I laughed heartily at Towa-kun who said it so coolly and smartly.

It’s strange how spending time with Towa-kun like this makes my worries seem so small.

It doesn’t mean that my rejection is trivial, but because I enjoy every day so much that I don’t care when I am around Towa-kun.

[It’s almost time to go ……. Good luck, Towa-kun.]

Time passed, and the day when Towa-kun’s hard work would finally be rewarded was approaching.

I supported Towa-kun to the extent that I could, and Towa-kun tried his best to cheer me and Akemi up.

Towa-kun, who is still in junior high school, worked hard with such a precious desire to see Akemi’s smile, and his hard work should definitely have been rewarded.

[SHU!!]

[…… eh?]

But …… fate was too cruel.

[……Towa…… kun?]

His years of hard work and care had been snatched away in an instant.

When I saw Towa-kun fall down unconscious, my heart was pounding with blood and I was doubtful if he was even alive, and I was really afraid to think about that …… if he was gone.

[……TOWA-KUN!!]

Still, the worst was averted.

But on that day, I learned more about the ugliness of human beings.

[You know, we don’t need you. Shu has Ayana, and Ayana has Shu. You must have been punished because of your presence.]

Shu-kun’s mother …… that filth uttered this.

[It is fine just with Onii-chan and Ayane nee-chan. I don’t want to have him around.]

Shut up, shut up, you’re the one that needs to go away.

[Towa can’t make it to the tournament …… haha]

Why are you laughing? It’s your fault Towa-kun got into an accident!

[I knew from that moment on that he was a disgusting child. With a mother like that, it’s no wonder he’s not getting a good education.]

I have the same blood as this person, and just thinking about it makes me sick.

I put my hand on my chest, which made me want to vomit, and I noticed that it was slightly damp and I knew it was tears that Towa-kun had shed.

Towa-kun was doing his best just to make Akemi smile, and something in me changed when she easily brushed aside such precious thoughts with her words.

[Those people are not people. Those people are…..Those people are!]

I could no longer believe that they were the same people.

[….It hurts….]

My heart creaked as I watched Towa-kun trying his best to rehabilitate himself so that his body could move.

I was so happy that Towa-kun was so kind to me and cared about me even though he should have had his hands full with himself. …… But I was a shallow lump for being so happy about Towa-kun’s kindness.

And then I heard.

[I …… like Ayana. I want Towa to support me in this. You are my best friend, so I wanted to be the first to tell you.]

When I came to visit Towa-kun as usual, I was there when Shu-kun was saying this to Towa-kun.

I was hidden by the suddenness of the moment, but the words brought back vividly to my mind the look on Shu-kun’s face as he laughed at the sight of Towa-kun’s suspiciously disheveled appearance.

[…..You gotta be kidding me……..you gotta be kidding me, YOU GOTTA BE F*CKING KIDDING WITH ME!]

That family, how much do they have to make me sick?

My heart, which tried to be indifferent, turned …… black with hatred.