I felt I had already become completely engrossed in the Emperor doting on me. Now if I did not see him for a little while, I felt uncomfortable in my heart, the longing feeling was also difficult to describe.
But lately the Emperor did not take me with him to morning court, but I had no idea why, because he was sick of me? But it didn’t seem like it, because as long as the two of us were alone together, the Emperor was still feeling me up, kissing me and cuddling me.
I also privately asked around for what was happening in the imperial court, but to my surprise, lately everyone was keeping their mouths rather tightly shut, especially Yuan Moshu. I fawned over him but he was still unwilling to tell me.
Zhou Xin was the same, since the last time that the Emperor had caught us, he was always avoiding me.
Today if I hadn’t gone to find him, perhaps, we would not have met again for a while.
“Zhou Xin, why have you been hiding from me lately?”
Zhou Xin looked flustered, and dragged me inside, “Liu Xiaoyu, do you want to get me killed? Did you really not know that the Emperor has decreed that he does not allow any palace maids or eunuchs to get close to you?”
Eh? The Emperor would actually lay down this kind of decree? ? ?
That’s right, I understood, the Emperor is the Son of Heaven, in the end, I was a eunuch who couldn’t climb up above my station.
Just as my heart was beginning to waver, He da-re came looking for me.
He looked just as handsome and elegant as ever, every time I saw him, he had his head raised high at the side of the Emperor. Regardless of societal views, they seemed very compatible – a wise ruler and a virtuous subject, soulmates since childhood.
But He-daren’s words made me truly fathom the enormous difference between him and I.
“Liu-gonggong, do you know who this official is?”
He da-ren was standing before me, his manner was imposing and pressing, making me feel like I couldn’t raise my head.
“This servant, this servant has seen He da-ren before.”
He stared at me, standing with his hands held behind him, “Liu-gonggong, this official will not beat around the bush. I’ve come to see you now in the hopes that you can act appropriately. The Emperor is your ruler and you are the Emperor’s subject, bewitching your ruler is unacceptable, taking the path of loyalty to the ruler is the righteous way.”
No, it wasn’t like that, I had never thought of wanting to bewitch the Emperor, I looked up and met his gaze, and when I saw the righteousness in his eyes, I was unable to speak.
“Right now, rumours are flying around up and down the imperial court saying that the Emperor is fawning over a eunuch and delaying official matters. The consorts and concubines in the imperial harem incredibly resentful, there are many of the low-ranking consorts and concubines who have yet to even see the Emperor, yet, there are disorderly noises heard every day from Yangxin Palace, Qianqing Palace and even Qinzheng Palace2Yangxin Palace is the Emperor’s personal palace, Qianqing Palace is where he reads his memorials etc and Qinzheng Palace is literally diligent affairs palace – so these are all places where the Emperor should not be “indulging” but working hard. Liu-gonggong, do you wish for the Emperor to bear a blackened name for all of eternity?”
“It’s not like that, He da-ren, this servant, this servant doesn’t wish for this…..” He da-ren’s words were too heavy, so heavy that I was unable to breathe, it was as if an invisible hand was ruthlessly squeezing my neck.
At this moment, He da-ren suddenly softened up, he patted my shoulder, “I will stop talking here, I believe that this official need not go on, the Emperor
？ He da-ren left, I watched his noble and arrogant rear view. I knew that he was truly doing this for the good of the Emperor, he was being sincere for the good of Shangqi but could I really turn the Emperor into an incompetent ruler? Could it be that that person was right all along from back then, I was someone who could damage the country and harm the people?
How could I possibly bear such a heavy accusation..
But why was I wrong to like the Emperor? All my life, the Emperor was the first person to dote on me like this, and to seek revenge when he knew that I had been bullied.
How could I possibly be willing to let go of this kind of person….
But I also did not want him to be spurned by everyone, what exactly should I do?
As I thought about this problem, I was unable to settle my mind.
I originally thought that when I saw the Emperor at lunch then everything would be better but he had been called away to Shoukang Palace to see the Empress Dowager.
It couldn’t be for the sake of Consort Shun again right….
I shook my head violently, and realised that I was indeed overly obsessed with the Emperor. Before I had said that I would ask about Xiao Chun being transferred over, but much time had passed since, I don’t know if Xiao Chun was mad at me now or not.
In fact, there were a few times that I had mentioned that I had a really good friend to the Emperor but everytime the Emperor distracted me and in the end the matter of Xiao Chun leaving the Palace Laundry Service had been continually put off.
This time, I needed to go and apologise to him, and then when I saw the Emperor next, I needed to immediately make it happen.
However, what caught me completely off guard, Xiao Chun was already no longer at the Palace Laundry Service.
I asked a little palace maid that I knew from before, she said that Xiao Chun had been transferred to Shoukang Palace, and he had already left about four or five days ago, but I knew nothing of it.
Then how come Xiao Chun also never came to tell me…..
I was slightly depressed about it and idly strolled back to Yangxin Palace.
When I got to the entrance, I bumped into Xiruo and pulled her to one side to ask about Xiao Chun.
Xiruo was very surprised, “What? You didn’t know?”
“En.”
“That’s weird, two days ago, Xiao Chun came to see me, and even brought me some small tangerines that the Empress Dowager had bestowed, it was so tasty.”
“Really?”
“That’s right, plus, he said that the Empress Dowager has been really good to him, and the servants of Shoukang Palace are also nice, what is it, did he not come to see you?”
Hearing Xiruo say that, I felt a bitterness in my heart, if that was true, then Xiao Chun was indeed mad at me right?
I shook my head, Xiruo immediately explained, “Xiaoyu, don’t overthink things, perhaps, you were busy at the time, plus nowadays, you’re greatly favoured, as long as the Emperor is in the palace, he always brings you along….”
Although Xiruo was trying to comfort me, the more I heard the more upset I got, was it the fact that I was too engrossed in receiving the Emperor’s favour that I had neglected my friends?
Alas, how come the stress was adding up…..
“Liu Xiaoyu?”
I heard the Emperor’s voice behind me, Xiruo immediately bowed, as did I.
When I saw the emperor, he winked at me with a smile as usual, I immediately felt a lot more free. Did I really like the Emperor to this degree?
After asking Xiruo to withdraw, Yuan Moshu flashed a small basket in his hand at me.
I immediately understood to take it and then I nodded at him, and followed behind the Emperor into the back courtyard to his sleeping quarters.
There were some peeled little tangerines inside. After the initial delight, I was reminded of Xiao Chun. These were probably brought back from the Empress Dowager’s palace. It should have been Xiao Chun who brought them over to me but….
Seeing me sigh, the Emperor embraced me from behind, “What is it my little goldfish, you’ve been picky with food lately, you don’t even want to eat tangerines?”
“No, not at all, Your Majesty, don’t make fun of this servant.”
“Then what is it, tell me.”
The Emperor turned me around to face him, I bit my lip, “Your Majesty, before I entered the palace, the fortune teller said that this servant would be someone who would damage the country and harm the people…….”
“Who said that!” The Emperor’s arms tightened around my body, “Liu Xiaoyu, what kind of nonsense have you heard?”
I jumped from fright, “Responding to Your Majesty, it’s not like that…..”
The Emperor picked up a segment of tangerine and placed it into my mouth, his eyes were like a torch as he stared at me, “Liu Xiaoyu, don’t listen to anything, and don’t be afraid of anything, just obediently stay by my side, got it?”
And then the Emperor’s kiss which melded with the sweet juices of tangerine already answered for me…..
