CH 13

Near ten o’clock in the evening, looking out through the French windows, crowds of densely packed dark clouds flocked over from the Northwest, swallowing half the sky so tightly that not a ray of light could be spilled out. 

Takeout boxes littered the table. Perhaps the delivery address was somewhat awe-inspiring, that even the love-stickers seeking praise were well-pasted in a timid manner. 

In this villa, besides the gardener and the driver who would come to pick up Lu Shangjin, there were neither cleaning aunties, chefs, nor servants who could take care of Lu Shangjin’s daily life. That had always been Yan Yi’s job. After they broke up, Yan Yi had appeared in front of him again with a resume in his hand, his eyes shining brightly as he asked to be employed as the butler of the villa. 

That little rabbit had always known how to act coquettish; puckering his butt and nestling on the sofa. He would continue to lie on the side in disappointment when he didn’t receive his touch, looking at him with clear eyes, until Lu Shangjin put his hand on his head to pat him and knead the ears hanging cutely in his hair.   

After breaking up, he stuck to him again, but he became proper and restrained. 

In fact, if he paid more attention, he could still see the glimmering light in his eyes, like a star that received a wish from a believer, brightly shining enthusiastically. 

Lu Shangjin waited for the response from the other end of the conversation. He leaned against the sofa with his legs crossed and his leather shoes occasionally tapping the ground impatiently. 

Running away from home, this little rabbit had the ability to go against him. 

There was a long silence on the phone. Lu Shangjin wasn’t busy right now, so he could afford Yan Yi with some patience. 

Thirty boxes of Timothy hay were stacked on the floor next to the sofa. He couldn’t name the type of hay before, but his assistant said it was rabbit snacks bought from the pet store. 

He wanted Yan Yi to come home quickly, wanted to see him holding his gift in surprise and thank him. Lu Shangjin would feel very pleased at that expression. 

It was unclear whether any lingering feelings had been completely wiped out after breaking up. But whenever he saw Yan Yi, he would think about the flesh and blood of the A3 glands, and be incapable of restraining the rejection in his heart as he cruelly wanted to get rid of him from his world. 

And when he was gone, he couldn’t contain his thoughts. 

He admitted that when he heard Yan Yi almost breaking down crying while begging, ‘Why do you not love me anymore’, his heart had truly hurt. The little rabbit never begged anyone, but had lowered his head to him more than once. Before, he absolutely couldn’t bear to hear his humble and fragile voice. 

If he was still that eighteen year old boy, he would hold him in his arms without hesitation and kiss him, using sufficient soothing pheromones to protect Yan Yi and let him sleep in his arms the whole night until his back turned sore from not moving for a long time. Even then, he wouldn’t dare to let go in fear of waking the little rabbit sleeping peacefully in his arms. 

What feelings could withstand the test of more than ten years? He was tired and annoyed at one terrible thing after another. 

There were plenty of rabbits and many substitutes, he didn’t need to suffer so much for love. 

Hence, he would be attracted to more sweet omegas, sexually indulge with his friends, and shelve away the treasure that he held in the palm of his hand from his past, isolating him from his own word. Even if Yan Yi wanted to integrate into Lu Shangjin’s social circle, it would be futile. 

Lu Shangjin knew that the reason things had come to such an unmanageable mess today was because of Lu Lin, not Yan Yi. Lu Lin was downright an abnormal homicidal maniac. With a family of peregrine falcons who could suck blood for him at any time, it was his means of terrorism that thoroughly destroyed Lu Shangjin’s feelings for Yan Yi, which was already on unbroken thin ice. He was furious and betrayed about Yan Yi going to a club and being intimate with another alpha, but only he knew that it was just an excuse to break up. 

Their feelings had faded, but it was only faded. Yan Yi remained as the untouchable treasure in his heart- It was Lu Lin who fired a shot at the center of the thin platform that had already been tossed about by the wind and rain, blowing off the lingering love that could barely continue with his own hands. 

Since then, Lu Shangjin subconsciously regarded his rejection towards Yan Yi as a blackmail chip against Lu Lin. The innocent lop-eared rabbit unknowingly became the funerary object of the dysfunctional father-son relationship, wearing away Yan Yi’s devotion that never seemed to burn out. 

Really, it couldn’t burn out. Look at that hopping little rabbit. Even if you lift up his ears and toss them around, he would still lie back in his original position, then quietly and obediently hide in a corner and look at you. 

Lu Shangjin sighed and crushed the last cigarette butt. 

“Come back and have the operation, be good.”

The voice on the phone was a little weak, “Jin ge, do you like hamsters that much? If I pinch my ears, they’ll look like a hamster’s too.” 

The ashtray was suddenly knocked to the ground by Lu Shangjin, the falling cigarette ashes staining the corner of his pants. With an explosive burst, Lu Shangjin’s patience was completely exhausted. He said furiously to the receiver, “How much interest do you think I have in a rodent?! Fine, Yan Yi, don’t come back. I’ll see how long you can last outside.” 

After hanging up, he threw his phone firmly and smashed against the neatly stacked boxes of rabbit snacks into a mess, haphazardly scattering scraps of hay onto the floor. He was so used to being sought after, and lost patience from enduring disobedience. 

He just didn’t know that rabbits were very timid. Under the placid expression, he might have already been overwhelmed with fear, quietly hiding in a corner with nowhere to escape. 

——

Yan Yi leaned against the blanket and looked at the black screen in a daze. 

He was waiting for Lu Shangjin to just tell him to go home, not go home for the operation. 

He was looking forward to changing his glands with a higher fit for Lu Shangjin, but why did the other party take his sacrifice for granted and regarded it as something justifiable? The third-grade differentiated glands were not biologically obtained. He had paid a painful and bloody price for it, he even felt pity towards himself. 

An omega who stood on top of the pyramid was reduced to become such a sorry mess, why couldn’t Lu Shangjin just ask him more about his health? 

Lacking spirit in his eyes, he stared at his pale and slender hand dazedly. 

When Lu Lin had pressed this hand into the high-speed juicer, he had been very clear-headed. 

The rapidly spinning razor blades were so sharp that he only felt pain a few seconds later. 

What kind of pain was that?

It was so painful that he didn’t dare to remember it. He saw himself in the lens of Lu Lin’s Phnom Penh glasses, his expression so distorted that he couldn’t even recognize himself. 

Lu Lin hoped that his third-grade differentiative ability was ‘limb regeneration’, and had injected a great amount of lizard alpha pheromones, but the desperate differentiation primer only made him differentiate into ‘transience’. 

He was one of the many soldiers trained as the Lu family’s cutting-edge weaponry, and he had become the one and only elite. 

When he was subjected to the most harsh and painful differentiation guidance, Lu Shangjin was probably attending school. He had heard Lu Shangjin play the piano in the piano room, and still remembered the melody, Croatian Rhapsody. The warm and romantic tune was like a life-saving rope that dragged him out of a muddy swamp, making his pulse and heart beat for that boy from then on. 

He just didn’t want to admit that Lu Shangjin and Lu Lin weren’t good company. 

In the past, his wish was to quietly sit on the wooden bench and listen to Lu Shangjin play a song for him. He had made the same wish on his birthday every year. 

But wishes wouldn’t come true once they’re said aloud. He didn’t want to say it before, and indulgently wanted Lu Shangjin to guess what was on his mind. Now, he didn’t dare to say it, afraid it will really not come true. 

He was also very tired. He took out his notebook and deducted Lu Shangjin by one point. If he was reduced to zero, Yan Yi really didn’t want to love him anymore. 

He was always used to giving himself a chance. As he was watching a video, he impatiently waited for it to load. He told himself he wouldn’t wait anymore after counting to five. After counting, it still didn’t load. His heart said, count another five then. 

He was very, very tired. For a long time, he hadn’t been as youthful and passionate as he was back in those days. 

“I’m already an old rabbit.” He dully thought. 

These middle-aged vigorous nostalgic fantasies, he should wake up quickly. 

The screen suddenly lit up; it was that number again. Yan Yi picked up the call with drooping eyes. 

“Are you still unwell?” The alpha knew he was pregnant, but as always paid attention to him, “Where are you? Give me the address, I’ll go to you.” 

The abandoned old rabbit didn’t deserve such a persistent pursuer. Yan Yi didn’t feel the overwhelming flattery, and only didn’t want to deal with it as he grew more exhausted. 

“Your voice sounds hoarse, did you catch a cold or did you cry recently?” The alpha asked carefully. 

The young alpha’s voice carried a trace of arrogant tenderness, with a tone that was afraid of offending while expressing a kind of disharmonious loveliness; the voice of a young master risking his pride. 

Yan Yi didn’t bring any pyjamas. After taking off his pants and coat, he was left only in a thin cream-coloured sweater that softly covered his thighs and hid his palms, only exposing his fingers. With his legs crossed, he leaned against the headboard and held a soft pillow in his arms to protect the baby in his belly. 

He sighed and had to summon a little energy to face this telephone affair. He asked directly, “How old are you?”

The alpha was clearly caught off guard and hesitated to answer.

“Twen… twenty four.”

Yan Yi asked again, “What’s your name?”

The omega who faced unrequited love thoroughly examined the household registration book. He had also unexpectedly gotten a little taste of sweetness and peace of mind, so he replied excitedly, “Xia Jingtian.” Completely losing the low tone of feigning to be steady and mature, but remained gentle. 

Yan Yi smiled, “Little kid.” 

However, he was too tired to even lift the corners of his mouth. The scar in his heart had just been lifted, still painfully dripping with blood.