CH 53

Warning: suicide 

Lu Shangjin silently put the spoon back into the soup bowl before holding Yan Yi’s armpits and letting him sit astride his lap. 

Yan Yi tilted his head to the side. 

“Look at me.” Lu Shangjin held Yan Yi’s face and made him look into his eyes, “Baby, do you recognize me?”

Yan Yi looked at him with his mouth slightly open, his gaze slack, not knowing if he was even looking into Lu Shangjin’s eyes. 

Feeling his heart ache from Yan Yi’s trance-like appearance, Lu Shangjin held his back and pulled him forward, kissing the corner of his lips. 

Yan Yi lowered his eyelids as his little rabbit ears idly flung towards Lu Shangjin’s face. 

He stared at the ring on Lu Shangjin’s left hand and froze for a moment, whispering to himself, “Lu Shangjin…”

Lu Shangjin’s shoulders perked up. He caressed his back with some excitement. “It’s me.”

“Lu Shangjin…” Yan Yi covered his little tummy as though he was fending against sudden pain and hunched his body uncomfortably like a cooked shrimp. It felt as if a hand was pressing desperately on his stomach. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry baby.” Lu Shangjin scooped up the half-cooled winter melon soup and fed it to him, “We’ll go upstairs to rest after eating.”

Yan Yi suddenly lifted his eyelashes, revealing a deeply wounded look. He suddenly raised his hand to knock the spoon out of Lu Shangjin’s hand and lifted the bowl of soup.

The soup splattered onto the floor as the wooden bowl rolled a few meters away in solitude.

“I don’t like Lu Shangjin.” Yan Yi got down from Lu Shangjin, who was frozen in place, before heading back to the storage room to look for the closet. 

Lu Shangjin remained silent in the chair for a while. He then lit a cigarette, finishing it in a few puffs, before squatting down to clean up the scattered dishes and soup on the floor. 

The closet in the storage room was closed tightly. Yan Yi nestled within and felt around inside the pillow, pulling out a phone with a little bit of battery life left. 

He scrolled through Weibo in boredom. 

Yuan Mi, who was the only celebrity he followed, recently posted an announcement. It was a picture of a marriage certificate with an alpha, and also another picture with two people in it. 

Yan Yi recalled carefully for a long time and vaguely remembered that he had once hated this person. 

His fingertips touched the picture of the marriage certificate repeatedly before saving it to his photo album. 

A screenshot of a video call was saved in the photo album. It was of an alpha wearing a cross-neck bathrobe, smiling gently at the camera. 

“Lu Shangjin…” Yan Yi held his phone and looked at it for a very, very long time. The alpha had profound eyebrows and eyes. He had touched it countless times, but now he had forgotten the reason why. 

His head hurt terribly.

After the paralyzing toxins wore off, all the memories, both disoriented and vivid, flooded into his head. He once again remembered some of the agonizing memories that would haunt him for the rest of his life. 

The humble love of that omega in his mind. 

Lu Shangjin pressed the omega underneath him from behind, forcibly pinning him against the french window, guiding him with a deep, sexy voice in his ear, “Bend your waist a little more, ass up, spread your legs.”

The omega put his hands on the glass and closed his eyes, trying to console himself with deception. This place was so isolated, no one would see the look of him being held down at the waist by the man in the suit behind him.

Lu Shangjin reached out and lifted his jaw, ordering in a low voice, “Open your eyes.”

The omega shivered slightly. Lu Shangjin’s right hand reached in front of him, fiercely clutching the white and slender neck until the omega couldn’t help but clutch his neck with both hands, trying to break the iron clamps that were making him suffer in suffocation, “…Xiansheng, I…can’t breathe…”

The powerful alpha’s scent enveloped him. As an omega who had no fight against such an oppressive scent, he shivered and supported himself against the glass window, his trembling legs barely holding up the weight of his body. 

Lu Shangjin looked at him in a vile manner as he weakly begged for mercy, looking at his tears and restlessness. Time and again, he crudely suppressed him with the alpha’s innate domineering scent and gently kissed the soft rabbit ears that couldn’t help but droop down, stroking the root of his fluffy tail. 

The submissive gene of the omega made him really like being obedient to Lu Shangjin in his heart, but because Lu Shangjin didn’t love him anymore, he suffered terribly every time he entered. 

Even so, he still wanted to have Lu Shangjin as his alpha.

Yan Yi extended his hand towards him, trying to pull the omega who was suffering to his side as he watched him sadly, “No—come here, stupid rabbit.” 

Lu Shangjin kissed the glands at the back of the omega’s neck, the sweet scent of the milk-candy pheromones softly seducing him. He couldn’t resist kissing the back of his neck. 

Voice choking and trembling, the omega said absent-mindedly as another thrust came, “Xiansheng, bite it, mark me, let me be your omega…”

Instead, Lu Shangjin kissed his lips and blocked all his words back into his mouth, kissing him with his skillful tongue until the omega became hard again, wearily kneeling by the french window and waiting for him to come in again. 

Lu Shangjin lit a cigarette and took a drag, slowly exhaling out a mouthful of white mist. At the next moment, the cigarette butt, which was still flicking with sparks, was pressed against the omega’s thigh. 

Even when pierced by machine gun bullets, it was not as painful as being burned by this little faint spark. Because it was Lu Shangjin, he didn’t dare evade it. 

“Stop it…” Yan Yi knelt down and blocked the skin of the omega’s legs with his hands, desperately trying to protect him from being burned, “Don’t endure it anymore…there’s no end to it.”

The omega’s tail trembled with pain, confined in Lu Shangjin’s arms and prohibited from moving around. The red hot end of the cigarette on his pale skin gave off a burning smell. The omega’s eyes filled with tears, twitching as he apologized and begged for mercy, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, Xiansheng, I was wrong!”

Lu Shangjin threw the cigarette butt and kissed the soft rabbit ears, instructing in a low voice, “My apologies for causing you pain, but now you’re just a butler in my house. I hope you don’t forget again that I hate questions about marking.” 

“Yes…” The omega knelt on the cold hard floor. Hearing his phone ring, Lu Shangjin took the call and threw the condom in front of the omega before walking out of the office. 

“It’s too tight, I can’t use it. Go and get a suitable one, then take some medicine so you don’t give me any trouble.”

After the office door shut coldly, the omega curled up in exhaustion on his side and laid on the floor. He struggled to pick up the torn yet unused condom and put it away in the pocket of the suit thrown on the floor. He then got up, put his clothes on and took the car keys home. 

There were band-aids in the car, and he tore one off to put it on the burn mark on his thigh.

Yan Yi knew that he had always put a box of band-aids in his car.

Because lop-eared rabbits were fragile and easily injured, and his alpha would always hurt him carelessly. 

He tried hard to pick out the meaning of the heartache in Lu Shangjin’s eyes. 

Yan Yi grabbed the omega’s collar and asked sadly, “What’s wrong with you…don’t you know how to love yourself?”

The omega paused, knitted his brows and smiled. He gently interlocked his fingers with Yan Yi’s right hand, their wedding rings colliding, “I love him…I’m waiting for him to come back and love me.”

“Will I be able to wait? Actually I’m…a little tired.” That rabbit omega smiled at him wearily.

Yan Yi forcefully pressed on the sharp pain in his temples, trying to prevent the unbearable memories from awakening, “No…that’s not me, that’s not me…”

The omega in his memory was so lowly and humble that it scared him. He couldn’t wait to break into his memory and shoot himself in the head at that time, when he had been accommodating for the sake of what was best. 

Yan Yi buried his head under the pillow and shivered. It seemed like the pair of forearms was entwining around his waist in a tightening hold again, firmly pressing on his stomach as blood dripped from between his legs, causing a terrifying pain in his heart and lower abdomen.  

“…Don’t come near me…I’m not…” Yan Yi rolled in the closet with his head in his arms, “Don’t remember it…”

When he opened his eyes, he was panicked to see Shao Wenjing’s hands wrapped around his wrists, the pupils of his eyes shining with metallic luster as he licked his lips and smiled, “The A3 gland really is strong.”

Lu Lin was also grabbing his ankles and smiled darkly at him, “It’s inducing the differentiation of limb regeneration, you should succeed in it, endure it a little…”

Yan Yi hit the closet wall with a thud and fell out with his head down first.

He suddenly fell into a warm embrace. 

Lu Shangjin caught him from underneath and smoothly carried the little rabbit up. He touched his arm comfortingly and whispered in his ear, “Don’t be afraid, ge is here.”

Yan Yi looked at him absently, his cheeks stained with tears. 

“Don’t cry anymore, don’t think about anything anymore, I’ve sent someone to buy pumpkins, eat some later.” Lu Shangjin held him as he wiped his tears. 

Yan Yi curled up in Lu Shangjin’s arms and grasped his collar tightly, his nose flared nervously and his dark pupils trembled. 

“Why didn’t you mark me…I’m not afraid…not afraid of gland hunters, not afraid of Lu Lin…I’m A3…PBB’s strongest lop-eared rabbit, I don’t need your…hypocritical protection…”

“You…hit me…so hard…say that—you’re tired of me and you hate me…say it, tell me quickly.” 

He was afraid. 

This look broke Lu Shangjin’s heart.

“I was blinded by the degree of fit, I was being vain, I was seeking pleasure, I’m not sick of you…but I really can’t mark you right now.” Lu Shangjin held him tightly, making a gesture of a gentle small bite on the side of the little rabbit’s neck, leaving a faint imprint. 

The little rabbit suddenly went quiet and looked down, trying hard to see the mark as he touched it carefully. 

The mark on Yan Yi’s glands had already been washed away once. Even if there was an alpha with a high degree of compatibility fit, it might not cover it successfully. His glands simply couldn’t bear to be tossed around with tests that had unknown results. 

The assistant had just brought in the pumpkin, when Lu Shangjin stroked his hair, “Wait for me, I’ll be back soon.”

He then took advantage of the space of time while Yan Yi’s spirit was temporarily stabilized to pick up the pumpkin delivered by the assistant.

Yan Yi sat quietly in the storage room.

After waiting for a while, he suddenly smiled faintly and lightly swayed his legs, lowering his head and carefully touching the faint teeth marks on his neck. 

Just to comfort him temporarily, Lu Shangjin had gently bit him as a mark. 

The closet was facing a mirror. Yan Yi stumbled and jumped out, trembling as he walked over to it.

The faint teeth marks on his neck had disappeared. 

The warmth on Yan Yi’s face had also slowly faded in temperature. 

The cold and indifferent voice in his ear lingered, “Our compatibility fit is so low, Yan Yan, so low…”

“Yan Yan…”

Lu Shangjin came back with a small pumpkin in his hand, intending to carry Yan Yi to the kitchen. As he pushed open the door of the storage room, his hands shook with surprise. 

Yan Yi was sitting in the closet, holding a gun in his hand, which he had hidden from who knew where, with the muzzle pointed to his glands. 

The little pumpkin rolled away from his feet. 

“Bang!”

Without a silencer, the gunshot was deafening. 

“Yan Yan-!!!” His accompanying ability “seize” instantly consumed all of Lu Shangjin’s glandular energy. He grabbed Yan Yi right out of the closet, holding him tight and fell to the ground. 

A bloody line streaked against the ground.

A stream of thick and sticky plasma flowed out all over along the glands from the back of his neck, like a pool of blown up red wine. 

The gun made a crisp rattling sound when it fell onto the ground. Yan Yi’s fingers loosened as the corners of his lips lifted slightly in a relieved smile.
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