CH 70

To tell the truth, standing in front of him now, Yan Yi was roughly the same as what Lu Shangjin had expected. Just calmer than he imagined.

He had been ready to be slapped in the face, yet all he got was a mild and quiet question, and it produced a more desolate panic. 

When he leaned against the car door to light his cigarette, the sparks reflected in his downcast grey eyes, illuminating the loneliness in them even more clearly.

Lu Shangjin wanted to raise his hand to touch him. His fingertips moved slightly, restrained and clenched in his palm.

He deliberated over a dozen apologies and persuasions in his heart, but what he said out loud was, “……Come home and I’ll make you a midnight snack.”

The corners of Yan Yi’s lips pulled up as he looked down at the flashing spark between his fingers, “Go home, go back to our home?” 

“It’s our new home, don’t you remember? In a couple of days someone will come to modify the standing wall in the study.” Lu Shangjin explained in a low voice and knocked on the glass to ask the driver to go, lest he heard more than he should.

Yan Yi’s eyes were clouded over with a layer of  emotional struggle.

He did remember Lu Shangjin’s considerate care for the past year, the fond love he pampered him with, as gentle as fine rain that fell on his cheeks in early spring when he was seventeen. 

He even vividly remembered him humbly begging Yan Yi not to leave him in his sleep.

“I trusted you once before.” Yan Yi did his best to relax his tense shoulders.

Yan Yi’s coldness made Lu Shangjin’s hair stand on end, further confirming his most feared suspicion—that Yan Yi liked him with all his heart, simply because of Lu Shangjin’s mark on his body.

Lu Shangjin turned his head to look away, desperately trying to conceal his pain.

An oppressive aura nearby was quietly closing in on them.

The two simultaneously sensed the approaching danger and subconsciously turned their backs to each other, their muzzles pointing in different directions.

“Don’t get so close.” Yan Yi frowned. The way he instinctually entrusted his back to the other party like it was second nature hadn’t disappeared.

There was a subtle difference from his previous partner. Lu Shangjin’s posture was more like protecting Yan Yi in the narrow space behind him.

“Get into the car first.” Lu Shangjin reached back from behind to gather him. No one could hurt the little rabbit again, and neither could the little rabbit afford to get hurt again.

Yan Yi pulled open the door of the driver’s seat and quickly sat in. Lu Shangjin rolled over and landed on the other side, getting into the passenger seat, before skillfully fastening the seat belt and pulling out an AK47 from under the seat.

“Don’t be scared, you won’t get hurt when I’m next to you.” Lu Shangjin looked down to check the magazine. His right hand that was loading it kept trembling, scattering bullets to his feet. He hurriedly picked them up to push into the magazine.

“Is there…something wrong with your hand?” Yan Yi averted his line of sight to glance at him. 

“Nothing wrong.” He hugged the AK and leaned back wearily in his chair, barely pulling out an easy smile, “Are you concerned about me?”

Yan Yi bit the end of the cigarette butt that was almost finished and reversed the direction, increasing the speed to 102, and dashed off like lightning.

Smoke slowly trailed from his teeth. Yan Yi focused on racing, occasionally dusting the ashes into the ashtray, “I’m now a weak omega, I can’t help.”

There was a deafening sound of impact on the rear windshield, and a bullet mark was scratched into the bulletproof glass.

He wanted to say a few more words at first, but Lu Shangin squeezed out a “fuck” between his teeth, pressing open the shooting sunroof of the modified Bentley to poke out the upper half of his body and shoot at the van that was in hot pursuit behind them.

On the other hand, Yan Yi skillfully controlled the direction, allowing Lu Shangjin to find the opportunity to shoot steadily while he was driving at an extreme speed.

Two drone bombs buzzed and circled after them, positioning themselves before swooping down toward the speeding Bentley.

“Yan Yan! Get out!”

The terrifying roar sounded like thunder. Yan Yi was thrown out by force, and at the moment he was in the air, the Bentley, still speeding forward, exploded into a ball of fire in front of him.

Lu Shangjin wrapped him in his coat and rolled when he landed, his back hitting the ground heavily.

Yan Yi laid on his body and stared dazedly at the eyes of the alpha beneath him. Suddenly, the back of his head was pressed to his chest by the alpha’s large hand, as the light scent of Narcissus plunged into his nose.

The severity and fickleness were reduced from the alpha’s slightly raised eyebrows, and replaced by an unimaginable gentle steadiness. 

Without time to linger, Lu Shangjin rolled over and picked Yan Yi up, leading him through the narrow crack of the building.

Yan Yi wrapped his arms around Lu Shangjin’s neck, picked up Lu Shangjin’s MP433 with both hands, and pointed it at the drone chasing overhead behind them. The bullets fired in quick succession, hitting the detonator accurately.

With two loud bangs, the drones exploded into two huge black clouds and fell onto the road behind them, exploding with bursts of asphalt and gravel.

Lu Shangjin’s right hand was trembling as he changed direction while holding Yan Yi. He muttered words of comfort, feeling for Yan Yi’s hand and holding it in his palm, caressing the juncture between his thumb and index finger that was hurt by the recoil force for his sake. 

A tiny current rolled through his heart. Yan Yi bit hard on his lower lip.

After escaping back to the villa, Lu Shangjin immediately turned on the highest protection level of the villa’s security system to attract attention, then drove away quietly from the back passage of the underground garage with a dusty old Volkswagen.

When he stumbled into and locked the door of their new home, Lu Shangjin hugged Yan Yi and sat down on the sofa, panting violently.

Yan Yi swept away the hand resting on him and went to the kitchen to boil a pot of hot water before pouring a cup and putting it in front of him. Without saying a word, he stepped on the wooden stairs to the second floor, locked himself in the bedroom, and never came out again.

Lu Shangjin turned over, gasping as he buried his face in the sofa cushions. With difficulty, he used his left hand to feel for his phone to notify Bi Ruijing and Xia Pingtian of the attack today.

Only after waiting for the trembling of his right fingers to lessen did he drag his tired feet up to the second floor. He held his knuckles up to the closed bedroom door and hung them there for a moment before he slowly lowered them. 

Pet dogs often looked forward to following their owners up to their bedroom in order to feel safe in a private space and to confirm their acceptance.

Lu Shangjin held his empty heart and silently endured the pain.

“I’ll go make something for you to eat. It’s uncomfortable to sleep on an empty stomach.” 

A bowl of pumpkin porridge and a plate of scrambled eggs with cucumber was brought to the table. The young master, who used to keep his ten fingers out of the water, was now moving skillfully and agilely in the kitchen.

Lu Shangjin sat alone at the table and waited for a while. The porridge was cooled just enough to taste before he sent a message to Yan Yi to come down and eat.

After that, he didn’t know what else to do. He laid on the table quietly, gently rubbing his right shoulder, then fished out a carry-on painkiller from his pocket and poured it into his mouth. 

The pill stuck to his dry throat and it took several gulps of water to swallow it down. He didn’t bother pressing it down further even when his mouth was full of the bitter taste. 

In the bedroom lit only by a dim wall lamp, Yan Yi pillowed his hand as he nestled sideways on the pillow, idly flipping through the phone album in his phone. 

Three or four hundred travel photos filled his screen and he flipped through them one by one. Occasionally, his gaze would linger on a certain photo. The alpha lying on the beach with him was holding his shoulder in a somewhat childish manner, no different from a couple in love. 

He originally thought he would be sleepy after flipping through for a while, but after a whole hour or so later, Yan Yi was still awake.

After flipping through the travel photos, he saw a group photo taken at home. In the background was the bed where he was now lying. 

He zoomed in to look at the Tuzki drawn on the glands on Lu Shangjin’s nape by a marker.

How could the alpha who was willing to let him run wild by himself be Lu Shangjin?

Yan Yi got up to get the glass of water on the table. There was a somewhat old paper crane hanging from the neck of the vintage desk lamp on the table. Hanging from a thin line under the paper crane was a piece of paper with familiar handwriting that read: The first gift I got from baby bunny.

A burst of unbearable agitation suddenly rose in his heart.  Yan Yi gritted his teeth and yanked off that paper crane, clutching it in his hand and throwing it into the paper basket fiercely.

He utterly detested the fake deep affection that rendered him more than willing to be cheated out of everything again and again. 

Yan Yi pulled out the backpack from the closet, picked up a few changes of clothes, and stuffed them into it. He suddenly remembered there were still some of his things downstairs, so he took the backpack and pulled open the bedroom door.

Lu Shangjin was startled, carrying a bowl of golden pumpkin porridge that had been reheated for who knew how many times. Standing awkwardly outside the bedroom door, he was nearly knocked over by Yan Yi.

Yan Yi looked at the bowl of porridge in his hand and froze for a moment, before leaning to the side and walking out of the bedroom through the gap next to him.

Lu Shangjin saw him carrying a bag, and from the open zipper, he could see a change of clean underwear and shirt.

He didn’t stop Yan Yi, but slowly walked into the bedroom and put the bowl of porridge on the table. Seeing the torn thread on the neck of the table lamp, he fell into a daze for a while. 

He then bent over and rummaged through the paper basket, picked out the crumpled paper crane, and put it in the palm of his hand, flattening it. He spread out the two wings that Yan Yi creased from clutching it and tied the torn threads back together.

His right hand wasn’t very obedient. It took him five minutes of concentration to tie the paper crane back in its original place.

Turning back, Yan Yi leaned against the door with his backpack hanging over one shoulder, holding his arms and looking at him. His eyes lingered for a moment on the paper crane that was tied back on then turned to the side impatiently. 

Lu Shangjin opened his mouth, but his throat was choked up and he couldn’t say anything.

Yan Yi asked, “Where did you keep all my things?”

Before leaving the house, Lu Shangjin had hidden all of Yan Yi’s things. Rather than being afraid that he would go, he was more afraid that Yan Yi would go too quickly and decisively.

Lu Shangjin looked at him helplessly, rubbing the sweat on his palm, and explained in a low voice, “I’m sorry…about that abortion, I was too reckless and too paranoid ……”

Yan Yi pushed Lu Shangjin aside and searched in the drawer under the bed. He found a bag of bits and pieces of little things, opening the seal to look, then putting it all away in his backpack. 

He turned to leave, but his arm was grabbed and the alpha came up from behind him, his cold, sweaty hands helplessly wrapped around his waist.

“It’s dangerous outside. It’s too late- midnight…too cold…” Lu Shangjin choked on a sob and kissed his hair, “You sleep here, I won’t come in.”

The look in Yan Yi’s eyes stagnated for a few seconds, determined to break his fingers away. Lu Shangjin’s right hand seemed to exert little strength and was easily forced open.

Lu Shangjin panicked and fished out a piece of paper folded into a square from his pocket. He carefully flattened it and handed it to Yan Yi with his trembling right hand.

“You said you’d still love me when you’re twenty-seven, you wrote it to me.” Lu Shangjin looked at him desperately and longingly, as if looking at the last match in his hand that was about to burn out.

Like being pricked by a needle, Yan Yi shivered. He grabbed the piece of paper from his hand and tore it to pieces, then slapped it back into Lu Shangjin’s hand, “I broke my promise, go sue me then!”

Lu Shangjin’s vision blurred for a moment, and when it became clear again, he only saw the door of their home being slammed shut.

He stood alone in the sudden silence of his bedroom, like a family dog abandoned in the countryside at night, waiting helplessly for the lights of a car that wouldn’t turn back.

It was difficult to get a car in the middle of the night. Yan Yi walked along the highway aimlessly, his heart tied with numerous chaotically tangled woollen threads. He wanted to try hard to pull them apart, but the more they tangled, the more they tightened, making his heart hurt. 

Suddenly, his vision darkened. Yan Yi knelt down on a pile of stones by the roadside, and laid down painfully on his side, covering the vague ache in his abdomen. Cold sweat seeped from the corners of his forehead down his cheeks.

The moment he was about to lose consciousness, his body was caught in a warm embrace. Strong forearms wrapped around the bend of his knees and lifted him up, his forehead pressed against an alpha’s broad chest.

Yan Yi preferred the light scent of narcissus flowing into his nose and glands coming from the green belt on the roadside rather than this person holding him.

He felt that this wave of narcissus pheromones was extremely unstable, but was unable to open his eyes. He was dimly aware that he had been put in the back seat of a car, and later lost even this bit of clear consciousness.

At 8 o’clock in the morning, Dr. Zhong clocked in.

As soon as he entered the hall, he saw Lu Shangjin sitting on the bench waiting anxiously.

“Good morning xian-sheng, has something happened?” Dr. Zhong glanced at his watch, “Last night’s emergency?” 

Lu Shangjin nodded and said in a hoarse voice, “He completely recovered last night, but his emotional state and mood are not considered stable.”

He hasn’t allowed me to go up to see him yet.

The elevator doors opened a crack.

Lu Shangjin stood up and quickly went over to help Yan Yi walk out.

Yan Yi’s face was pale, and his steps were more erratic than when he had just been sent to the hospital. He held him in a trance like he had lost his soul, and didn’t say a word.

“What’s wrong, what did the doctor say?” Lu Shangjin’s heart was twisting tighter and tighter. Looking at Yan Yi’s appearance, he was afraid that he had come down with a serious illness.

“Glandular disease? Leaving a lingering effect? Where do you feel discomfort?” Lu Shangjin was so anxious that he circled around him, and finally couldn’t help but block him. He held Yan Yi’s shoulders with both hands and leaned down to stare at him, “Tell me!”

Yan Yi violently pushed him away with a slap to his face, loud enough that it nearly echoed through the hall.

“You’re a beast.” He said. 

Lu Shangjin stood in front of him, his face burning with pain, but at a loss for what to do, he couldn’t be bothered to touch it. He picked up the scattered examination report and glanced down at the ten lines. Pausing in surprise, he then took a breath to read it carefully.

His eyes rested on the blurred image for a long time before slowly moving to the list of data below.

The doctor said that the fetus was all right and was in its third trimester.

“…” Lu Shangjin’s lips trembled and his vision blurred.

He suddenly picked Yan Yi up and ran into the elevator, asking the doctor and nurse all the way back in the consultation room.

The old doctor who just gave Yan Yi an ultrasound saw the alpha rushing into the consultation room recklessly and frowned, “You still not taking him home to take good care of him? What are you running for?”

Yan Yi pushed away the hand tightly wrapped around his waist and tilted his line of sight to the window without speaking.

The old doctor lowered his glasses and looked up at the couple. He always felt that the atmosphere between the two was odd. Thinking they were another young couple who only knew how to seek pleasure without caring for their bodies or taking precautions, he coughed with contempt:

“Xian-sheng, having an abortion now is very damaging to the body, and the omega’s glands had been operated on before. One cannot guarantee the supply of pheromones needed by the fetus. The alpha has to put all efforts into taking care.” 

Suddenly, under the astonished gaze of everyone in the consultation room, Lu Shangjin pulled out a palm-sized brand-new notebook from his pocket and concentrated on writing down the doctor’s instructions.

Sitting by the side, Yan Yi watched Lu Shangjin’s side profile looking down to take notes from the reflection of the glass, looking like a teenager preparing for the college entrance examination in a classroom. 

Water flowed into his heart, gently caressing the wounds that had been dried and cracked for a long time.