CH 177

It was nostalgic.

In the morning, I left the house to part ways with Kaede on the way and walked to school alone.

After arriving in the classroom, I spent some time listening to music before heading continuing with the classes.

During lunch break, I ate Kaede’s special bento in a secluded place, and then went to my afternoon class.

There wasn’t anything to do in the student council, and when I heard the bell that marks the end of classes, I headed back home.

This should have been my normal routine just a short while ago, but I feel uncomfortable. It is evident that I had begun to get used to the noisy daily routine.

Most of the places I walk, scenes from my past come to mind as memories.

I began to take different paths to avoid them.

Human memories are not something that can be erased at will.

Even though I knew it was a useless action, but unnecessary thoughts were only stressful for me now.

In a park by the river, elementary school children were playing baseball.

Their faces were bright.

It is for the best.

One by one, as they approach adulthood, they will lose their innocence. 

Their minds become more mature, they look around them, and they get used to blending in with the crowd.

When I look at the kids in front of me, I even wonder if we really are growing up.

Abandoning something, abandoning our innocence, is that what it means to grow up?

Isn’t it just dyeing a blank canvas black, but not really growing up in any way?

Well, such mentality is useless.

As I resumed my halted steps, a pair of boys and a girl ran in front of me and then passed by.

They did not look alike in appearance, so I wondered if they were childhood friends.

As I turned and looked away from them, I caught sight of a girl in the same uniform as me.

“It brings back memories… we used to play like that too.”

“…I think I was just being dragged around.”

Looking in the same direction as me, Shizuku told me nostalgically.

For a moment, I wondered why she was walking this way, but I didn’t need to think about the answer to that obvious question.

My house is right across the street to hers, and when I’m not walking through my normal path, my route home is constricted.

She must have guessed that I was going home from this path, even though it was a bit of a detour.

I stood there until the boys were completely out of sight, and then I looked forward.

Shizuku walked next to me, shoulder to shoulder, at the same pace.

“…”

“…”

We looked at each other and at the scenery around us several times, but never spoke a word.

I wonder how long it’s been since I’ve walked with her this way.

Shizuku just smiled at me.

As if to say, no words are needed.

We continued along the river, and just before entering the residential area, we stopped in front of an old house.

The house is rusted in places and there is no sign of it now, but it used to be a candy store.

That store, run by an elderly couple, was not exactly prosperous.

However, they said they enjoyed seeing the kids, so they stayed in business for decades until we were in junior high school.

But as the town’s population dwindled and the number of children began to decrease, the store, which had a bit of history, closed its doors a few years ago.

On the last day of business, Shizuku, Kaede, and I visited the store, which remains strongly in my memory.

I remember that I bought a lot of sweets when I came to this store, even though I usually don’t waste money.

I spent money less often in the past than I do now so my savings revolved around this shop.

Rather, I was even running the whole damn finances of this candy store.

…I’m kidding, of course.

The allowance of a child isn’t much.

Shizuku let out a chuckle at my words, and her eyes narrowed.

“But the things you bought were always things that Kaede and I liked. Were you thinking of giving them if we asked for them?”

“…Don’t remember.”

I don’t want you to revisit my petty young mind.

Well, maybe I wanted to show a brother’s kindness and a childhood friend how cool I was, even though I was a little boy back then, too.

Now it’s a long time ago, a forgotten past.

Did she come here to reminisce?

No, of course not.

“You’re mad, right…?”

“What…”

“The sports festival …I invited you, but I couldn’t say anything.”

You’re concerned about that?

I have told you before that I don’t get angry about such things.

However, it might have been stuck deep in her chest like a fish bone.

“You can’t blame yourself for not being able to say in that situation …didn’t I say I didn’t care the last time I was there…?”

“But, …in the end, I wasn’t any different from before.”

“I don’t care what people think anymore” is what she said sometime ago.

This was the trigger for her own decision to change, and it was an issue that she had always held in her heart.

However, if it were that easy to change, the world would be a better place and there would be less trouble.

It takes time for people to change.

It is challenging to take the first step, and even then there’s is a difficult path ahead.

A path that I hate and want to go back to.

She and I were just approaching the first of these.

She and I turned back.

I can’t say that it was a bad choice for me.

However, it was a bad choice for Shizuku, and she herself seemed to regret it.

“You know how they say you should cherish your high school friends… so it’s fine for you to think it’s better that your classmates don’t have a bad image of you.”

“…Lies are told in such a way that the other person can’t understand. …I told you, didn’t I? Minato-kun is a person who can’t lie.”

“…”

Shizuku shook her head while saying those words.

It may seem like she’s repeating herself, but the time is a scary thing.

The more time you have, the more likely you are to come up with an answer that is close to what the other person is thinking.

I turned my head to the side to look away from her self-harming smile.

We continued on our way away from the old building and entered a familiar neighborhood.

We go through the main street and pass by a park that we often see.

We stopped in front of the road that separated the Shinra and Kanazaki families and stood facing each other.

“The sports festival is getting that way because of me, but I’m still going to give you my answer.”

“…I don’t think you need to be concerned about that.”

Her eyes seemed to have an answer already.

I let out a slight breath of relief at those words and stepped onto the Shinra household.

The moment I unlocked the front door and pulled open the door, Shizuku spoke.

“Minato-kun! …I’m not going to be in an event with anyone other than you.”

I wonder what the girl who turned around and smiled at me was thinking when she spoke those words.

It will be a little while before we know the answer to that question.