CH 51

is current situation is very dangerous.”

Standing outside the one-way glass wall, Qi Chuan looked at Qi Han inside and said tentatively: “Generally, patients who have suffered a huge blow and collapsed within a short period of time will develop a serious tendency to self-destruct, mental confusion, psychological distortion and will be trapped in memories, unable to come out. We privately call it an imaginary nest.”

“If they don’t regain consciousness within two to three days, they may not be able to wake up again in their life.”

“Just like… me back then…” Fu Ge blinked slowly.

Qi Chuan was stunned for a few seconds and hummed, “You were… able to pull through on your own, without the help of any medicine. It is already a medical miracle. Qi Han’s condition might be even worse. His health is already very poor.”

Fu Ge smiled, raised his eyes despondently and looked at the man behind the glass window who had his hands and feet bound by chains.

He was on his knees, both hands suspended high in the air, his head hanging low as if it was no longer under his control, just a decoration stuck to his neck.

The gauze covering his right eye was half soaked with blood, and tears, dust and blood on his face dried together, winding towards his neck.

Several loops of dirty bandage were wrapped around his neck, and there was a round bloody mark on the right side of his Adam’s apple. That was the hole he had pierced with a pen, and the wound opened again. 

The supreme, untouchable President Qi was now a prisoner at the mercy of others, slumped in the corner like a pile of garbage.

It had been five hours since Fu Ge snatched him away from the gland hunters on the Linhai Highway and brought him here at the risk of harbouring a condemned prisoner, and Qi Han refused to be touched or even approached by anyone.

He would go berserk as soon as the doctor approached him, and only when there was no one in the room would he be quiet for a short time, staring at the corner next to the door with those cloudy, desperate eyes, without blinking.

This feeling was too familiar. Fu Ge knew that he was also looking at his hallucinations.

“It’s been only four days, and you can’t take it anymore…”

Fu Ge stuck his fingernails deep into his palms, his throat choking with bitterness, “I’ve lived this kind of life for three years…”

Qi Chuan thought for a while and advised him: “If you don’t want to take care of him, we can find a place where there is no one to dump him, or hand him over to the police directly. After all, he is now wanted by the whole country, so don’t get burned.”

“Then let’s dump him.”

Fu Ge said: “It only took me three days back then. If he can’t wake up within three days, let’s just… leave him alone.”

Qi Chuan was taken aback when he heard these words. His lips moved but he didn’t say anything else in the end.

“Do we need to give him medicine? With the aid of medicine and physical stimulation, he may wake up faster.”

“Aid of medicine?” Fu Ge raised his eyebrows almost imperceptibly. “Oral or intravenous? And what does physical stimulation mean?”

Qi Chuan said: “Intravenous. Physical stimulation is generally electric shock, or a certain stimulation of the tips of his fingers with needles.”

“What about the effect?”

“It varies from person to person.”

“No need.” After blurting out the words of refusal, Fu Ge pinched his palm and repeated: “You are not allowed to use any of it on him.”

The same glass windows, the same dark basement, the same iron chains that were so heavy that you couldn’t lift your hands and feet, and even the pose were exactly the same as that of Fu Ge who had been locked in the small house back then.

The lives of the two of them were completely reversed. Qi Han had tasted the torment and pain that Fu Ge had endured back then, but oddly enough, the young Beta was not happy.

Qi Han stared at that corner inside the room for three hours, and he stared at Qi Han from outside for three hours.

When he opened the door and walked in, his legs were numb, and the wind in the corridor almost blew through his bones.

“What are you looking at?” Fu Ge sat in a chair and asked, his face expressionless.

The listless Alpha didn’t seem to hear him. He just kept looking at the corner. Fu Ge asked again: “Ah Han, what are you looking at?”

The long-unheard name made Qi Han move his eyelids. He opened his mouth very, very slowly, and squeezed out a few words in his hoarse voice: “Looking at the kitchen, he is making fish for me, pan-fried little yellowtails, we caught them together…”

It was the first meal they had after moving to a new apartment five years ago.

The apartment was rented after they saved money together. Fu Ge sold paintings and Qi Han worked part-time. It took half a year to rent the best one in the area. To celebrate, the two went fishing together and came back to cook the fish.

Fu Ge’s cooking skills were ridiculously bad. He smashed all the bitter gall bladders of the little fish and fried them bitter, fishy and salty, but he would carefully pick out every bone, and Qi Han foolishly ate everything on his plate.

“Are you happy?” Fu Ge asked him coldly.

Qi Han smiled, and the cracked corners of his mouth bled: “Happy. Xiao Ge is the only one… who treats me well, particularly, particularly well. No matter how capricious I am, he will stay with me.”

“Really.” Fu Ge sneered, “But that’s all fake.”

Qi Han: “…what?”

As soon as he said that, Fu Ge got up abruptly, picked up a water cup on the table and slammed it into the corner. Qi Han shouted in horror: “Don’t!”

With a pop, the cup hit the little Beta wearing an apron. The glass shattered all over the floor, and the illusion suddenly disappeared.

Qi Han opened his eyes blankly, and after three seconds, he asked dumbly, “Where is gege…”

“Your gege is dead.”

Fu Ge approached step by step, lifted Qi Han’s chin, and said coldly: “You tortured him to death a long time ago.”

Qi Han shook his head, twisting his neck to avoid him, “No… it’s not like this… gege is not dead… he is back, we are already married…”

Fu Ge laughed suddenly. His suppressed laughter smothered in his throat sounded bizarre and pitiful.

“He’s back… you also know he’s back. But what if he’s not? He didn’t survive, he wasn’t rescued, he didn’t fight to his last breath to make it to the present!”

With a bang, the Alpha was pushed against the wall.

Fu Ge looked at his face and said word by word: “Then you’ll never know what really happened to him…”

“Died on the wedding day, died in those fourteen days, died in endless estrus, died on the operating table… these are all possible endings for him.”

“Oh yes, he was also pulled by his newlywed husband to accompany him to drink, and he was almost raped in the alley…”

The Beta let out a laugh, shaking so badly that his breathing was very shallow and thin, each word taking a huge amount of strength, “You know what? The place where it happened to me that night was only two blocks away from you. I cried and cried desperately, but you never came to save me from beginning to end. If Young Master Gu hadn’t arrived in time, I would have been torn apart…”

Qi Han shook his head in despair; his throat felt as if it was tightly choked, “I’m sorry… I… I didn’t know… I went to look for you too, I’d be there soon, I’d save you—”

“Right! You were there. I thought you came to save me…”

Fu Ge suddenly laughed, leaned down and stared straight at his lover with red eyes, “But you took off my clothes, choked me and forced me to answer how… I made out with them…”

“Do you still want to hear it? I can speak now, and I can tell you, detail by detail.”

“Don’t—” The Alpha wailed and collapsed on the floor, crawling backwards on his hands and feet, like a deflated ball. He shivered and scratched his arms, as he gasped and sobbed: “Don’t tell… I beg you to stop… please…”

“Why shouldn’t I tell? Don’t you want to hear it?”

Fu Ge walked towards him step by step. Such a thin and slender person was at this moment more cruel than King Yanluo in the tongue-pulling hell (the hell where people get their tongues pulled out; people get there for saying things they shouldn’t, among other things).

“They said: Yo, isn’t it Qi Han’s fiancée? Just married and already for sale, really found a good family.”

“Eighteen years old, so fresh. I wonder if you’re also so tender under your clothes. Your father is gone, it doesn’t matter, Uncles can take care of you.”

“Why don’t you scream out loud? It’s not fun if you don’t move and don’t cry. Look at you with your mouth open, like a dumb fish, how pathetic…”

“Stop talking!”

The iron chain slammed on the floor with a bang. Qi Han cowered against the wall, holding his head. His heart was already pierced and broken by Fu Ge’s words, and even breathing hurt as if his liver and guts were shattered.

“Kill me… you kill me… please kill me…”

The little Beta laughed scornfully, like a ghost with his beautiful eyebrows on his pale face, “Kill you? Nothing can be easier.”

He took out a knife in front of Qi Han, rolled up his sleeve and stabbed the sharp tip of the knife into his arm, cutting down inch by inch along the lines of his veins.

Blood gushed out like pomegranate juice, and Qi Han began to scream like crazy: “No! Don’t! Don’t do this… it hurts… it hurts… don’t stab gege! Don’t stab gege!”

He fell to his knees, his eyes filled with blood, tears sliding down his cheeks as he begged Fu Ge with all his might not to hurt himself.

But Fu Ge couldn’t hold on any longer.

Pain was the only thing that gave him strength to continue; love and courage were no longer worth anything.

He threw away the knife, took a tissue and pressed it to his arm casually, “Can’t take it anymore? I have something more fun.”

“My eighteen-year-old coming of age, the first joy of fish and water, was to comfort you in rut.”

Qi Han’s eyeballs trembled, and he shook his head very slightly as if his last breath was taken away.

He pressed himself against the wall and heard Fu Ge say, “When the atrophied inner cavity was forcibly opened, I passed out straight away from the pain, but because that person was you, I was willing to die of pain. Guess what happened?” 

The young Beta curled the corners of his mouth and repeated word by word: “You told me you weren’t even in rut and were just acting to torment me.”

“That was the time you left the lifetime mark on my body and then drove me out like a wretched dog when I needed comfort the most.”

The past was so vivid that Fu Ge’s back was cold when he thought of it even now.

“Do you know how Beta, who cannot use inhibitors, will spend the estrus period?”

“Do you know that the neighbours call Beta in estrus a bitch and a whore?”

“Do you know that removing the mark involves gouging out a layer of flesh from the inner cavity with a rotating steel knife?”

“Do you know that because the operation was not standardised, the anaesthetic wore off in the second half?”

The straightforward four-in-a-row questions hit him like a hammer; Qi Han half-opened his mouth, and there was a choking sound in his throat.

As if electrocuted, he raised his trembling hand and touched Fu Ge’s lower abdomen, his eyes almost bleeding, “The anaesthetic… wore off?”

“Right.”

“Did… did it hurt…”

Fu Ge smiled suddenly, “What do you think?”

He clearly felt his flesh being cut out piece by piece, his inner cavity was twisted into a pool of blood. He fainted from the pain countless times and woke up from the pain, yet he couldn’t make a sound because he didn’t have the strength to do so, much less open his eyes.

He was not born with a pain fetish, but his subconsciousness deceived him in the endless pain. No one protected him, and his body protected itself.

“Now you know where my lewd body has come from? Didn’t President Qi still take pleasure in it a few months ago, humiliating me to his heart’s content…”

Qi Han hung his head, and there was blood trickling from the corner of his mouth: “Is this… all that gege has endured in five years…”

Fu Ge said: “It’s just the tip of the iceberg.”

Qi Han glanced at the knife that had fallen at his feet and asked him, “If I die, you can live well, right?…”

Fu Ge also looked at the knife, his eyelids twitched, and he stammered: “Don’t… don’t flatter yourself, how important do you think you are to me?”

Qi Han’s mutilated heart collapsed, and he suddenly felt fear, “Gege, I beg you not to say any more…”

But Fu Ge didn’t let him go.

“Do you really think I loved you?”

Qi Han’s hand that reached for the knife gave a lurch.

Fu Ge clenched his fists fiercely, his heart feeling as if a knife twisted in it with every word he said: “Don’t be stupid. I have never loved you from beginning to end.”

“Love at first sight five years ago and getting back together five years later, it was all a lie.”

“Never, never, no one has ever loved you, let alone saved you.”

“I just saw that you were so lacking in love and so simple, longing for a home like a stray dog, and played with you.”

“President Qi, do you still take this joke seriously now?”

The Alpha, sitting with his head half-tilted, was motionless, and a stream of blood suddenly flowed out of his gauze-covered eye.

He no longer dared to recall what Fu Ge looked like five years ago, because the little Beta used one sentence of truth after another to make that boy bloody with his own hands.

He no longer dared to be trapped in the happiness of the past, unwilling to wake up, because Fu Ge used one lie after another to shatter the only two years and eight months of happiness he had ever had.

He was not qualified to live peacefully trapped in memories.

“Gege…”

Qi Han grabbed Fu Ge’s trouser leg before he left, clutching on the last gossamer strand of hope as he asked, “When I imprisoned you back then… when I imprisoned you, I said the same thing to you, right?…”

So you just wanted me to experience that taste too, you deliberately lied to me by saying that.

Fu Ge: “Yes, it’s just that what you said was false and what I said is true.”
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