CH 23

༺ Child-Making Date With Luna (3) ༻  

Luna hesitated for a while before speaking in a shrill voice.

“Well, Ummm… Do you mind if we party regularly from now on? Until we raise our adventurer rank…”  

The anxious look she sent towards me was very pitiful. I had a brief idea about what Luna wanted from me after looking at that expression.

She wasn’t capable enough to take care of things alone. It’s not like there was anything wrong with her, it’s just that being ordinary in this savage world was the same as being useless.

“Hmm…”

I don’t think I can take care of anyone though. I had recently been freed from slavery myself and was already having trouble with just managing my daily life and expenses.

Well, being at a regular party with her meant I’d interact with her a lot more in the future… Such matters require a lot of thinking and shouldn’t be rushed.

I’m not depraved enough to pick a pink Chikorita as my starter Pokemon just because it was pretty and cute. Wasn’t this like deliberately playing on hard mode?

“Well, I don’t think…”, I don’t think that’s possible was what I was going to say, but…

I shut my mouth as a sudden pain assaulted me. It felt like my stomach was swelling and my intestines were twisting as if someone was playing twister with them. I don’t know what’s happening right now but I really need to hit the bathroom.

What? The pain suddenly disappeared when I closed my mouth…

Did I eat something rotten yesterday? Well, I haven’t drank alcohol in a long time too.

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The food in this world was lumped together and made by hands that most probably weren’t even properly sanitized. Staying healthy while consuming it would be stranger. 

Man, it has been a really long time since I experienced such acute abdominal pain. This shit ain’t normal, damn it.

Luna continued speaking while I was embarrassed by my sudden stomach ache.

“Aren’t we? You promised me yesterday. You said we would make children together and make a party together. We even swore an oath upon the Styx. You said you couldn’t remember earlier so I’m just reminding you.” 

“I swore upon Styx to party with you?”

“Yes.”

I looked at Luna’s restless and pleading expression that was reminiscent of an abandoned puppy’s. She didn’t seem to be lying to me from her reactions.

Shit, I never expected something like this to happen.

I chanted the accursed remark, quietly enough for no one to hear me.

“Long Live the Chaos-“

Ding- 

[Stats]

Name: Hassan

Level: 8 → 9

Strength: 3 → 4

Agility: 2

Stamina: 3

Task: 247 → 147

Condition: Styx’s Oath

Blessing: The Blessing of Chaos 》Imperfect Dexterity

I had once again leveled up, thanks to Luna’s totem. My growth which had been stagnant for the past two years was now explosive enough to leave others in awe.

However, what I should be thinking of right now should be the Styx’s Oath rather than the change in my level.

I had already been worried about why it hadn’t been cleared out despite helping Luna with the totems as promised.

I didn’t know I had promised more, way fucking more. Damn, no matter how drunk someone can be, making this kind of outlandish promise while drinking and partying is shocking.

I wonder if the pain that ran through my stomach earlier and made my sphincter rumble, as if it would burst at any moment, had something to do with me breaking the Styx’s Oath.

I had been trained by my father’s monstrous habits for as long as I can remember. So, I had a strong stomach that wouldn’t budge even against Jjangdoljjige. [1] 

Only a curse of this caliber could cause my insides which had never failed in two years of slavery in another world to be so upset.

Damn it, I’m suffering from a weird curse that forces me to keep my promises. Of course, it’s easy to answer her in this case…

I shut my eyes.

Aaaagghhh-    

It was a life crisis.    

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I really want to run to the nearest bathroom but I don’t think I can even stand up at this point.   

“You promised me, Hassan… Don’t tell me you aren’t going to keep it. Horrible things will happen if you break your promise.”

Luna’s voice was cracking, almost sobbing at the end. I felt like I was caught in a trap, only the pain in my abdomen, which was making my face turn blue, kept me from getting dizzy. 

Damn it!    

“Alright, I got it. Let’s form a party from now on.” 

“Really?” 

“Yeah!” 

I reluctantly shouted. The pain in my lower abdomen suddenly ceased as if it was never there, to begin with when I finally agreed to her request. I don’t know what this pain was, but it was freaking insane and intense

It was a pain I didn’t want to be subjected to ever again if I could. I think I would have soiled my pants on the way to the bathroom, had something gone wrong. 

While the contempt of being called “Barbaroy” was acceptable, the thought of me being called “Long Splitter Hassan” [2] was unacceptable.    

Ding-    

『Styx’s Oath has been fulfilled.』

『Task Value + 10』

It seems my Task Value could go up without the necessity of using manual therapy to heal people. At least, I got some knowledge out of this whole ordeal, although it wasn’t in a direction I very much liked.

I shouldn’t make promises from now on. Nor should I ever drink again.

“Please take good care of me from now on, Hassan…” 

Whether she knew of my inner turmoil or not, Luna’s smile shined ever so brightly. Well, her cute and cheerful look when she smiled so much, that her perfect pearly white teeth appeared, was nice to gaze at.

I didn’t have the confidence of protecting her from a goblin or beast attack as she thought I did, though.

She seemed to think of me as a ‘Superman’ kind of existence, a brilliant invulnerable warrior. But as I mentioned earlier I was just plain old Hassan who had just gotten out of slavery and was desperately trying to maintain my living.

**

We decided to share the Stargazy pie that Luna ordered.

I began shoving pieces of the pie in my mouth without tasting them. Eating in this world was more akin to a chore that one wanted to get done with it quickly rather than something to enjoy and lavish in.

Damn, what kind of ‘novelty’ bastard thought it would be a good idea to bake a pie by adding a fish in it, it was also worth noting that the fish wasn’t even grilled, obviously.

Who liked this tarnation so much that the idea of putting it on a menu became normal? Only a bastard would sell something this, and another bastard who had zero taste for food would buy this crap. What a savage cuisine!

“It tastes so good, Hassan… Can you imagine how great it would be if we were able to enjoy this delicacy every day?”    

“Huh, yeah, eat a lot.”  

“You’re such a great guy!” 

With my permission acquired, Luna started stuffing even bigger pieces of the Stargazy pie into her mouth. It reminded me of one of the stray cars that roamed in front of our house back in my world.

I heard that stray cats usually stuff their stomachs with food whenever they can because they don’t know if they’ll be able to find more food later. 

Even stray cats had moms to take care of them, though. Barbarians like us had no one to take care of us, so we have to eat as much as possible while we can.

“Is it really that good?”

“There’s still some left, do you want more?”

“No.” 

Dinner, which was the end of my daily routine was nearly over. I then spoke to Luna who was now sipping cheap Barley wine instead of a glass of water.

“So, all we talked about yesterday was child-making and forming a party, right?”

“Yes. Other than that, I also talked about why I became an adventurer. Did you forget that too?”

“Well, yes. Could you please tell it to me again?”

“In Ideope, everyone has to travel outside after their coming of age ceremony. Only then, can you be recognized as a full-fledged member of the island.”

A coming of age ceremony? That’s how I interpreted it at least. You had to leave the nest and travel to another country to be considered a true member, this worked similarly to Mornomonism, a heretical religion in my homeland.

I always wondered why foreigners would walk around wearing suits while preaching in English. It was said that playing missionary overseas was essential to be a member. 

While I was immersed in my thoughts, Luna began chatting without a break, like a parrot that had finally learned to speak. She was very happy that she got herself a meal and a regular party to go on adventures.

“Ideope is cursed by the gods. Children are not born well and crops do not grow much. That’s why we set out on a journey to get Knox’s Arils[3]. I heard it’s somewhere in the underground labyrinth. With that our island will be a little bit livelier!”

“Hmmm, curse- curse, that’s it. I’m just asking because you’re a party member, but have you been cursed before?”

“Huh? Did such a thing happen to me? I don’t have any recollection about that, though.”

Looking at her, the way she was avoiding my eyes told me all I needed to know. It just looks ridiculous to me who is already aware of all the curses riddling her body.

Is she trying to hide that she’s been cursed? Well, it makes a lot of sense, no one would want a cursed person in their party.

Luna, that Chikorita, was desperately trying to hide her flaws. Wasn’t this a bad way to start things off with your party member?

Anyway, it looks like I’ll be adventuring with Luna for a while. We’ll have to work together at least until she reaches the Bronze tier and I fulfill my promise.

We might be attacked by goblins or be surrounded by gangsters again. But even then, Luna’s presence would be of great assistance.

Exploration parties, especially fixed ones have their own strength which was the expectation of your allies’ help.

My former master, Elfriede, a silver-ranked adventurer, also had a bunch of goons she ordered around. Like a queen bee and her worker bees.

Well, even the worker bees in this case were skilled silver-ranked adventurers. It was a far cry from Luna, a useless Chikorita…

All in all, forming a party with her wasn’t necessarily a bad thing.

Didn’t she have a weird talent that allowed her to make weird totems that enhance my abilities?

I pushed the positive thinking circuits in my head to produce the maximum output. Sensing that they started overheating, I changed the subject and then addressed Luna.

“Um, Uh, yeah. Luna. I’m only saying this because we are partying together. There are actually requirements to fulfill if you want to become my party member.”

“Requirements?”

“Yeah, you should find someone else to party with if you can’t fulfill them…”

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“I’ll do it!”

I’m not done, girl. Can’t she at least wait until I’m finished before agreeing?

“Please, listen to the end. I’m not forcing you, okay? If you don’t like it just say so…”

“Okay!”

“Please, just listen until the end. Anyway, don’t get this the wrong way but… I may have to touch your body.”

“My-My body?”

Luna who had been cheerfully and vigorously agreeing without even listening to me until now suddenly trembled hard, along with her pink twin tails, in embarrassment. Well, that’s a pretty normal reaction, if you ask me.

I’d stutter in embarrassment too if someone asked me, “Hassan let me touch your body” or something like that.

My intentions, contrary to what they may seem like, were very transparent, however. I was just trying to rid her of her curses and gain some Task points on the occasion.

Dispelling the curse of weakness that was holding her down became a priority since we were going to work together. This will help her grow and advance in many ways.

“Um, It’s because of the blessing I have. I have my reasons for asking this of you.”

“Ah-!”

Luna, who was blushing suddenly nodded as if she understood what I was trying to convey to her.

“…Are you talking about that? The thing you did to the innkeeper?”

I have no clue what she’s on about. It looks like she had watched me treat others while drunk since she mentioned the innkeeper.

It’s good too. It will make my explanations shorter and reassure her that it’s not sexual harassment.

“Right. Then, let’s get it done before going to bed tonight.”

“…”

Luna had a troubled expression on her face after hearing my words and was noticeably hesitating.   

It must be difficult to give a definitive answer in this situation. Even if it was an act of treatment, she had to show her bare body to someone she had just met for a few days.

I somehow understood the turmoil she was going through so I patiently waited for her reply.

“Hey, do I have to? Can we not form a party if I don’t…?”

“It’s necessary, yes.”

“…Oh, I see. So do we do it tonight? Or now…?”

“I think the sooner we are done with it, the better.”

After curtly answering her, I recalled all the manual therapy I had done on people using the healing power of my blessing.

Up until now, I’ve treated the conditions of two persons already. I was a little muddle-headed at the time and didn’t know much about what was happening, though.

It’s better to try knowing more and do some testing with my abilities since I’ve got the opportunity now. We both had a lot to get from this. Luna’s curse will be lifted, and my task number will go up. It’s a win-win situation for both of us.

Time passed.

I’m now sitting on the bed of the room I rented.

I never thought I’d rent a double room in my life. 20 coppers per night was a really expensive fee but I had to do it since I couldn’t treat Luna in a 6-person room.

I already spent 30 coppers in this inn in the last twenty-four hours.

It would never hurt to have more money as a newly-released slave, so this spending was simply too much. I’ll have to take some time to reflect on my extravagant expenses these days.

Why isn’t she here yet?

Luna disappeared somewhere saying she had something to prepare. I’m kinda curious as to what these preparations were about.

Maybe the savages from Ideope had something akin to a “Pray before you get a massage” habit.

Just when I started getting really nervous about her delay.

Knock- Knock-

“Luna? Is that you?”

“Y-yes.”

“Come in, it’s open.”

Creak-   

I heard the crude doorknob move, and then the door opened with a coarse sound.

Beyond it, I could see the hesitantly standing Luna. I wonder if it was because I just had dinner or if it was because of the dark hallway but Luna looked like… wait!

“My god, why are you dripping wet?”

“I was at the well, sir. I washed my body and brushed my teeth. Was it bad that I did so?”

Hmm, her hair and body being wet wouldn’t cause a problem, probably.

“Well, come on in.”

“Ugh, yeah…”

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She wavered as she reluctantly answered my call and then closed the door after entering the room. She had a pleading expression on her face, like a puppy that was being sent to the vet.

At the same time, a sweet floral scent started spreading throughout the cramped room and began stimulating my nerves.

“What’s with the peppermint smell?”

“I washed my body with Menthe flower oil. It’s good for the teeth too…” 

“Ah.”    

It seems this world also had its equivalent of Shampoo and toothpaste. It was a sweet smell mixed with a somewhat refreshing and cool scent, that I could pick up without even trying. All in all, it felt very good.

“Well, just lie down on the bed.”

She flinched at my words.

She also started trembling with tears welling up in her eyes as if she was about to burst into tears. Soon after that, she began undoing her accessories and untying her ornaments, and removing her clothes.

Strip- Strip- 

Aiyo, what the fuck are you doing?

“Wait, why are you taking off your clothes?” 

“Y-You said you’d to me the same thing you did to the innkeeper…” 

More flesh was being revealed while she was talking but most shockingly… Damn, what the fuck did I do to the innkeeper?

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[1] Jjangdoljjige is a kind of Korean soy paste soup or something. This is basically a bad dish to have for young people, but old people tend to like it. All in all, it’s not a great thing for the stomach and is infamous for making you take the loo multiple times, hence the sentence and comparison.

[2] Long Splitter is basically a slang that refers to someone who soils their pants, basically someone who can’t control their bowel movements. The original translation was “Shit/poopy Hassan” but we localized it to fit the context as that part makes practically no sense.

[3] Pomegranate seeds, don’t ask us why, we don’t know yet too.

Hello again, I still can’t believe stargazy pies are a thing, who’s the bastard who even thought this was a good idea. Anyway, Luna is just as cute as ever and the chapter got a little steamier at the end… See y’all next chapter.

24/08/22 edit: What we previously translated as Barbaroy, might originate from the term Barbaros, it’s what ancient greeks called non-greeks. Not that important but I thought I’d point it out lol, just a cool piece of trivia. I’m probably gonna make more of this as we learn more about the divinities since the mythologies they’re inspired from are pretty neat.  Another cool thing is that we have now 5 reviews for the novel, big thanks to the reviewers and I’d love to see more, please click on the link above.