CH 130

“Listen to me seriously, Carynne. At the very least, if you want to live, then you shouldn’t lie.”

“I confessed already, and I’ll be executed for my crimes. Sir Raymond, why are you even here?”

“Because you did not kill.”

“Mmh… Sir Raymond.”

Thuk. With the heel of her shoe, Carynne hit Raymond’s leg across from her underneath the table. It didn’t hurt because the heel wasn’t pointed.

“The thing that strangled Crown Prince Gueuze in that place was my necklace. Can’t you put two and two together?”

“Crown Prince Gueuze was a serial killer, and he kidnapped you. You acted only out of self defense.”

Raymond’s rebuttal made Carynne scowl—she’s not amused.

“That’s the story you’re going with?”

“Yes.”

“Ah, good grief.”

Carynne swept her hair up with her fingers.

“I killed Prince Lewis and Donna, too.”

“The sword that had stabbed His Highness Lewis had been perched high on the wall, certainly beyond your reach. And as for Donna… She was already badly injured. You merely showed her mercy.”

“That’s not what happened though?”

“No, that is what happened. Tell me which part is wrong.”

“……”

Carynne blinked. And, after a moment’s thought, she looked up at Raymond, her chin still on her palm. Only her eyes moved.

“To be honest, my pride is a bit slighted. I couldn’t win against Crown Prince Gueuze.”

“…Is that so?”

“Yes, at that moment, I wished to be stronger… But after everything that happened, it’s just that in someone else’s eyes. What transpired could not reveal what kind of resentment I felt inside, or what I thought during the process. I merely look weak to you.”

Raymond listened to Carynne as she sighed, then he took out the documents he brought for her.

“Your lawyer will come visit you tomorrow. And the trial will be in three days.”

Carynne looked at Raymond, slightly fed-up.

“Gracious… Sir Raymond, you really haven’t given up yet?”

“Yes. Because you didn’t kill him. The trial hasn’t even begun yet.”

“Crown Prince Gueuze… No, just stop it. Sir Raymond, look. Look at me. What do you see?”

“I see a beautiful woman.”

At that, Carynne looked like she wanted to tear Raymond apart then and there.

“I told you to stop making lame jokes.”

“…I’ll try.”

“What do you think of Prince Lewis?”

“I think that he was lost too soon.”

Thinking about Prince Lewis made Raymond feel heartbroken. The boy looked up at him so much.

However, he needed to focus on someone that he could save now, in the present.

Carynne stared at Raymond.

“Sir Raymond, we can all start over. Me, you, Prince Lewis… Even Donna.”

“After you die?”

“I will live again. It doesn’t matter if you believe me or not. And you can’t convince me otherwise.”

Raymond didn’t say anything back. What he needed to make sure here was that Carynne wouldn’t talk. There in the court, in front of the judge, she could not say, ‘I killed them all. Give me the death penalty.’ This singular move would wipe out all other preparations.

The outcome wasn’t set, and they really wouldn’t know until they’d try everything. But Carynne herself had no will to live. Circumstantial evidence would not be able to beat a confession.

In order for the countless number of bodies to be attributed to the crown prince, it was crucial to get direct confessions from his subordinates. And that would be dealt with by Marquis Penceir.

They wouldn’t know until the end of the trial.

But in the end, the probability of success was zero, yet Raymond continued to cling to it.

“You think of life… in too much of an inconsequential manner.”

“Death is inconsequential, too.”

“…Why did you tell me to love you?”

“Because I want to die.”

At that, Raymond asked.

“Then, are you satisfied now?”

Carynne’s eyes went wide. She stared at Raymond’s expression. Raymond himself did not know what kind of face he was making. But he was sure of this: he felt utterly miserable.

“Sir Raymond, are you angry?”

“At least try to live, Carynne. Do not denigrate your own life.”

“Haa.”

Carynne sighed. And she lowered her eyes.

“In the end, you don’t believe me.”

“……”

“Sir Raymond, I’m not afraid of being sentenced to death. I’ll live again. Actually, I’m hoping for it more. This life was too chaotic, and your love is just… I don’t understand it. But I know that you’re trying.”

“Carynne.”

Carynne looked straight ahead once more. Her eyes met Raymond’s, and she straightened her posture.

She made up her mind.

“I will be executed. And it will all start over. Prince Lewis will be the rightful king next time. Donna will come back.”

“People don’t come back to life.”

“I know you don’t believe me, but can you at least pretend?”

It wasn’t him who should do the bare minimum of pretending—it was her.

Raymond clenched his hands into fists.

“I’m trying to save you right now. Can’t you see?”

“I’m trying, too. I want to give you a better future. I’m being as behaved as I can be.”

From the very beginning, she did not love anyone. She asked for love, but she did not love. Not even Raymond.

But he thought that it would be alright.

Because there would be plenty of time.

“Carynne, there’s no such thing as a world outside the novel. Your life will be over once you die.”

But no. There is no time.

“I sent all of your records to four professors just to check. You hold no new knowledge. You keep saying that you come from a world outside the novel you speak of, but that place does not exist.”

Carynne watched Raymond silently. Raymond felt as if there was something stabbing him from the inside.

“Reverend Dullan also said that those are all lies for the sake of curing you. You don’t live over and over again.”

“You… You don’t believe me… But the truth won’t change.”

Carynne groaned as she answered back.

Even until the bitter end, she would not look at the situation properly.

Raymond rose from his seat.

“Nothing you say is correct. My older brother died five days ago. I was in the middle of working. It was an accident. I couldn’t even go back to the estate because I was working together with Marquis Penceir. You didn’t know any of that. You never told me it would happen.”

“That… You, never once did you say…”

“Crown Prince Gueuze and Prince Lewis were brothers. Baron Ein wasn’t the culprit of the serial killings… You don’t know anything, Carynne.”

“Wait… Wait a second.”

Carynne gasped. It seemed as if she was finding it unbearable to hear what she didn’t want to hear.

“At the very least, don’t inflict the death penalty unto yourself with a confession. Think of me.”

Raymond thought,

Carynne doesn’t love me. She doesn’t even respect me. She wouldn’t do this to me if she ever did. To someone trying his hardest to save her, she wouldn’t talk to me like she doesn’t care.

“Think of it as courtesy towards me.”

Raymond left. Carynne was still bowing her head.

As Raymond walked through the door, the guard tried to talk to him, but he was in no mood to exchange any more words.

“……”

Raymond left the building. It was the middle of the night.

He needed to find a lawyer so that she could be persuaded again. Even if it’s just to keep her silent.

Raymond found it difficult to deal with Carynne.

His older brother died. It was a death with no meaning.

Prince Lewis was dead. It was a death that happened too early.

Donna was dead. It was a death that no one remembered.

Raymond hated that kind of death.

“But the trial hasn’t even begun yet.”

It’s not that there’s no possibility at all.

He would continue to hope. The evening sky was full of stars. Just like the day he confessed to her.

It hadn’t been long, but why did it feel like an eternity had passed since then?

Raymond leaned against the building’s outer wall and closed his eyes,

Helpless.

* * *

Carynne was aware that she had been turning a blind eye to reality thus far. Even if she had repeated to herself, several times, that she should focus on reality—but all of it was just an act of escapism.

Didn’t she already realize that from the beginning?

Yet she turned away. She was scared.

“You don’t know anything.”

It’s you who doesn’t know anything.

It’s far from the truth that Carynne lived by. It’s far from the things that Raymond did not know.

However it was that the world worked, none of that had anything to do with Carynne.

But what difference would that make?