Volume 1 - CH 30.2

Act 1-30.2: Self-Proclaimed Immortal Divine Beast

―65000 years after the start of the game.

Even though I managed to clear a hundred floors in the last ten thousand years, my clearing speed had become far slower than before. Before, I could say that the reason for this was that I took my sweet time collecting monsters into my subjugation picture book from the 1st floor to the 600th floor. All I did after that was advance without any need to retrace my steps. Capturing the floors wasn’t a problem. The reason for this ten-thousand-year-long delay in clearing another hundred floors was just that this dungeon is too fu*king huge.

Keeping this aside, I just arrived on the 700th floor with Faf.

The 700th floor was a bright red ground with no vegetation in sight. Its sky was dyed red like the color of blood.

A giant red bird was enshrined in the center of this seemingly never-ending red scenery.

『Hou! A face I’ve never seen before. You managed to reach this floor, huh! Nameless One, it seems something has happened outside. Since that’s the case…』

That strange bird suddenly started talking to himself, lost in his own world.

Crap! I can’t measure this strange bird’s strength. Rather, what’s the difference between this strange bird and the other birds on this floor? But then, this might be due to the effect of the 【Glove of Sealing God】. I mean, I’m always having a hard time properly measuring my opponents’ strength nowadays.

「U~hn, Faf, what do you think about this fellow?」

「He seems like he would be delicious if we grill him, nodesu!」

Faf said with saliva dripping down from the tips of her lips. Her reaction never betrays my expectations.

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Yes. Faf is a glutton, and her favorite meat happens to be chicken meat. But, what I wanted to hear wasn’t that.

「Faf, you have to remember that you’re a girl. Always eating meat isn’t good for your body. Especially, if you try to eat that suspicious-looking, low-quality product bird before us, you might get a stomach ache, you know.」

「U~h, but it looks so delicious, nodesu.」

Faf had a dejected look on her face as she put her index finger on her lips.

「I will cook a nice meal for you once we get back to the upper ground, so please be patient for now.」

I gently reminded her while patting her head.

「Yes, nodesu!」

Faf cheerfully replied while pushing up her right fist. Yup, good girl.

『L-Low quality product you say!』

「Yeah well, it’s just a figure of speech. I mean, it’ll take a long time to explain the details.」

I tried to pacify that noisy strange bird while cleaning my ear with my left pinky finger. However, the bird frowned instead.

『UNFORGIVABLE! Such disrespect to this divine bird, the Phoenix, is simply UNFORGIVABLE!』

The strange bird flapped its wings and flew out from his shrine.

『Ha~h, another one, huh! Poor thing! Trial: Defeat 【Phoenix】! Begin!』

It was the usual female voice in my head. However, she didn’t speak in her usual inorganic voice; for some reason, her voice was filled with pity.

「Leave it to Faf, nodesu!」

Faf wiped the drool on her lips, then knocked her knuckles together.

Faf-san, hello Faf-san, your heart’s voice just leaked out, you know. Do you really want to eat that strange bird?

「No, leave him to me.」

「E~h, nodesu!」

After hearing Faf’s dissatisfied voice, I offered something she really wanted right now.

「Be patient! We’re going to have a lot of grilled chicken tonight.」

「Uuh, understood, nodesu.」

Even with my assurance, Faf still chewed her thumb regretfully.

『DON’T LOOK DOWN ON MEEEEEEE!!』

The strange bird let out an angry roar toward heaven. The next moment, a pillar of fire fell toward us from above.

Faf erased that fire pillar with a casual sweep of her hand as if she were swatting an annoying bug. As for me, since I had the heat assimilation skill, the fire pillar got absorbed into my body.

『What the!? My fla―』

Ignoring his speech, I bisected the strange bird with Raikiri. I thought that I had cleared the trial by bisecting the strange bird, but the usual announcement of the completion of my trial didn’t resound this time.

『KUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! It’s futile! Absolutely futile!!』

The strange bird’s figure was restored into his previous, uninjured state as he let out a deafening laugh.

「Uhm, that slash should’ve bisected him. Why does he seem to be okay?」

I mean, one would definitely die when someone cuts one in half.

『IT’S FUTILE! I’m immortal, undying!! I’m an immortal divine bird!! As if the likes of you―』

I tried to burn his head and limbs to ashes with Raikiri’s thunder.

「It seems he’s the real deal. Now then, let’s test your endurance.」

『YOU BA*TARD! How dare you interru―』

This time, I butchered his entire body. The next moment, a blazing pillar of fire arose from his butchered body parts, and the strange bird became whole again.

『Stop attacking me when I’m still talking!』

He got away from me as soon as his body rose into the sky again, glaring at me with undisguised bloodlust in his eyes.

『WELL WHATEVER! How’s that! Do you understand my power now! I’m immortal! I’m an immortal divine bird who governs rebirth and will be reborn no matter how many times you kill me!』

In short, that strange bird’s proud speech that had a hint of sarcasm indicated he was an immortal. Although I had met several beings who could resurrect after their death, this was the first time I met a being who could resurrect infinitely.

「KUHAHAHAHAHA!」

I unintentionally let out a delightful laugh.

THIS IS IT! YOU’RE THE BEST, STRANGE BIRD! If you’re telling the truth, it means that I can’t win against you with a normal, frontal attack! Naturally, I can probably win with ease if I use that skill, but it has been more than ten thousand years since I met an opponent who I couldn’t defeat with brute force.

『Do you understand now that you cannot defeat this immortal me?』

The strange bird proudly declared as if to dispel his irritation.

「GREAT! You are the best!」

『Poor bird…』

Thus, I started slaughtering the strange bird with the greatest delight I had ever felt while hearing a woman’s voice muttering something in my head.

Five hours later.

I had chopped that strange bird until he became nothing more than the finest pieces of meat.

『Confirming the subjugation of the Phoenix. You have cleared the trial.』

The female voice resounding in my head sounded rather slovenly this time.

「Eh?」

No, what the heck is this? He didn’t even last for a quarter of a day. I mean, is that all you got after all that bragging about immortal this, immortal that. At a time like this, you should show your godd*mn guts, shi*ty bird!

No matter how much I shouted in my heart, the transparent board that appeared before my eyes betrayed my last expectations.

『The Phoenix’s soul has appeared. Do you want to capture it with your subjugation picture book?』

DA*MIT! That fu*king big-mouthed, gutless strange bird was lying to me! Immortal, my as*s! Since he claimed to be immortal, he should’ve at least preserved for ten more years before giving up like a sissy!　

My resentment toward that gutless bird was as big as I expected. That strange bird, if I didn’t beat his rotten guts, he would keep acting like a spoiled kid inside the subjugation picture book.

I captured the Phoenix’s soul with the subjugation picture book.

「Master, Faf is famished.」

Faf’s pouting voice brought me out of my train of thoughts.

「Ah, sorry! I’ll immediately prepare the food. Today’s dinner will be your favorite grilled and skewered chicken.」

「Ya~y, nanodesu!」

Faf happily jumped with a delighted look on her face.

「Sure enough, Faf’s stomach can’t endure ten years of hunger.」

Thus, we returned to the surface while talking to each other.