“Sasakawa-san is amazing, right? Do you really get a lot of money from that?”
In her dream, a classmate from middle school appeared.
At that time, she was already working, which made her stand out in the class.
She received curious glances. Admiring gazes were directed at her. She was asked about her income and looked at with eyes that seemed to be begging for something.
“Well, a little, I guess.”
When she answered like that, she was first asked to buy them juice, then snacks, then accessories and cosmetics. The amount of money her friends demanded increased over time.
Spending nearly half the year working, she couldn’t share memories with her classmates.
Leaving school early wasn’t unusual for her, and she couldn’t fully participate in club activities. She received special treatment by teachers and resented by some students.
Money was what made up for it.
Despite knowing it was wrong, she couldn’t say no when asked.
She could see that if she did, she would be isolated.
“…!”
The sudden sound of rain woke her up.
It was the second period, math class. She had fallen asleep due to a combination of not understanding the subject and fatigue. As a result, she had a dream about her past, and it left her feeling terrible.
At the moment, she was living a healthy high school life.
However, because of her experience in middle school, she couldn’t establish deep relationships. Even if someone tried to befriend her, she would hesitate.
(“…Speaking of Fujimura, is his nose okay?”)
She glanced sideways. The boy who had helped her this morning was expressionless, scribbling with his mechanical pencil.
He always pretended to sleep and never talked to anyone. He was a strange guy.
She had to thank him.
(“To thank him…”)
She thought that if she didn’t spend money on him, he wouldn’t be satisfied.
If she was known as someone who couldn’t even repay the favor of being saved, no one would talk to her anymore.
“Ha…”
She sighed softly and looked out the window.
The thick clouds covering the sky locked away all the light and only let the rain pour down.
♠
After the incident with the blond-haired guy, he was cautious when he went to school, thinking that Ayano might talk to him, but she had been talking to her usual friends since morning and hadn’t paid any attention to him.
When he thought about it, it was only natural.
Although he had helped her from the pick-up attempt, that alone wouldn’t make her become friends with him. As a top-tier extrovert in the class, she was probably used to this kind of thing.
He mocked himself for being overly self-conscious and felt relieved that his quiet days were protected.
This was fine. They lived in different worlds, after all.
“Ah, Fujimura!”
As the chime signaling the end of the fourth period rang, and his classmates began to buzz about lunchtime.
Ayano’s hands landed on Kyosuke’s desk with a thud. He reflexively raised his face, and their eyes met in her clear gaze.
“Do you want to go to the cafeteria? I’ll treat you as a thank you for this morning.”
“…Huh? What?”
Curious gazes from around them pierced him.
Unconcerned about the attention, Ayano said, “Let’s go!” and pulled Kyosuke by the back of his neck out of the classroom as if catching a cat.
“W-wait a minute.”
Kyosuke broke free from her grip and put some distance between them.
What should he do? What should he say?
Going back in silence would be unnatural and leave a bad impression. He wanted to say that he had his lunch, but he hadn’t brought anything since he had planned to go to the cafeteria today.
He had to be careful. If he was rumored to be a rude person, his badge of being “the quiet and well-behaved one in the class” would be taken away.
“What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong… well, you see…”
“You don’t have to hold back. I have money.”
“That’s not the point.”
She had a job, so treating him to a meal would be no big deal.
He wasn’t worried about that. He just simply didn’t want to be involved with her.
“…You don’t have to thank me or anything. I got the tissues. Use the money you’ve earned for yourself, Sasagawa-san. Being treated will only cause me trouble.”
Feeling smug about his own words, Kyosuke secretly grinned.
This wouldn’t be unnatural. Even if he went back to the classroom like this, she wouldn’t think anything of it. As for the meal, he would just have to endure until he got home.
(“…hmm?”)
Ayano’s face darkened slightly, and Kyosuke furrowed his brow.
With a puzzled and confused expression, she moved her gaze restlessly like a lost child and swayed her body uneasily.
“Um, but… I have to thank you.”
“Huh? No, I said it’s fine.”
“But, but… you won’t be satisfied unless I spend money, right?”
“…”
“Everyone else was like that…”
“……I don’t know what you’ve been talking about since earlier, but gratitude isn’t a matter of money. And who is ‘everyone’? Don’t lump me in with them.”
Letting out a small sigh, he said, “Well, that’s that,” and turned on his heel.
The moment he took a step forward, he was suddenly pulled back and almost tripped. Ayano had grabbed the hem of his uniform.
“Is…is there something else?”
Cold sweat formed on his forehead, wondering if he had upset her.
“…What should I do?”
Lacking confidence but with a hint of joy on her cheeks, Ayano whispered softly.
“What do you mean, what should you do?”
“How to eat with Fujimura.”
“Huh?”
“If I don’t treat you, then how can I get Fujimura to eat with me?”
“…Can’t I just go back to the classroom to get my wallet?”
“………Oh, right.”
In response to her absurd question, he inadvertently replied normally.
Ayano nodded in understanding. Then, blushing and looking embarrassed, she scratched her head and crossed her arms behind her back, emphasizing her shapely figure.
“Okay, then. I’ll wait for you.”
Her voice was now thin and unconfident, completely different from when she had spoken to him in the classroom.
Kyosuke didn’t quite understand, but he was free now. He turned on his heel and hurried back to the classroom.
There was nothing to it. He just needed to leave her alone.
If asked later, he could say he had a stomachache and went to the infirmary. He didn’t know what would be said if someone saw him eating with Ayano.
“…”
He suddenly thought of her expression from earlier.
Why was she so unconfident? Most boys would follow her without hesitation if she invited them. Even girls wouldn’t refuse. Why, when she wasn’t an outcast like him?
(Well, I am hungry. I won’t make it through the afternoon if I don’t eat.)
He reassured himself, nodding repeatedly.
Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed that the rain that had been falling since morning had completely stopped.
“Is that all you’re having…?”
There was a single small bowl of mini kitsune udon.
Despite her being a girl, Kyosuke couldn’t help but murmur at her rather meager meal.
“I usually eat mostly vegetables, but today’s a day when I can have carbs.”
Saying that, she slurped her udon noodles. Maintaining her figure was probably part of her job. He honestly admired her stoic attitude.
Kyosuke also began to eat slowly, but his appetite wasn’t great.
The reason was the gazes from those around them.
Most of the people in the space looked at her at least once, and then glanced at Kyosuke as if he was an afterthought. As expected, he was attracting attention, and it was unbearably uncomfortable.
“Is it not good?”
Ayano tilted her head and asked. He must have been making a terribly difficult face.
“No, it’s not that…”
“You’re lying. It must not taste good. You’re making that face.”
“I was born with this face.”
“Geez, you’re hopeless.”
As she said that, she put down her chopsticks and held out her hand.
Looking at her, her udon bowl was already empty.
“Should I eat it for you?”
She wiggled her fingers. It seemed she wanted him to hand her a spoon.
“…You just want to eat it, don’t you, Sasagawa-san?”
“No, that’s not it! Look, they say there are seven gods in every grain of rice! It’s a waste to leave it, you know?”
“Order your own. You don’t have to take mine.”
“Well, that’s… I need a good reason, otherwise I feel guilty…um…”
“You really do just want to eat it, don’t you?”
While he had praised her as stoic, she seemed to be quite easygoing in some ways.
Kyosuke opened his mouth wide and shoveled curry rice into it. From the rice to the curry roux, curry was a block of carbohydrates. Ayano watched him with envy, her face like a hungry Chihuahua.
“…Ah, I might not be able to finish this. I wish someone would just take a bite…”
“Yes, I’ll eat it!”
Ayano raised her hand with enthusiasm as if she was about to pounce on the overly monotonous help. It hurt his conscience to leave the plate empty, and it was unpleasant to eat while being stared at.
“Well then, let’s eat.”
The bite was too large to be called just a mouthful.
Chewing with her mouth full, puffing out hot air, two grains of rice stuck to the corners of Ayano’s mouth. For an ordinary person, it would just look silly, but for her, it naturally turned into a picturesque scene.
“Seriously…”
He let out a sigh as she returned the plate, from which a third of its content had been taken away.
As he picked up his spoon to resume his meal, a thought crossed his mind.
(Does this mean…)
Using the same tableware Ayano had used meant something more intimate.
Unconsciously, his eyes were drawn to Ayano’s lips, where her red tongue flicked out to lick the remaining sauce.
That sight made his cheeks flush with heat. Scolding himself internally for thinking such a disgusting thought, he felt embarrassed.
(As expected of a social butterfly, not caring at all.)
The spoon originally belonged to Kyosuke. Ayano must have known this but didn’t seem to care at all.
“…You can eat the rest of this.”
“Eh? Really?”
It wasn’t that he was a clean freak.
For Kyosuke, continuing to eat while being conscious of an indirect kiss was too high of a hurdle. It was better to just give her the rest of the food.
“Fujimura, you’re so wasteful.”
“No more curry, even if you flatter me.”
“I didn’t mean it like that. It’s just that you don’t talk to anyone.”
“It’s fine. No one benefits from talking to me.”
“Eh? I find it fun, though.”
“…Enough with the flattery.”
As he responded with a slightly prickly tone, Ayano lowered her gaze, her face showing a hint of shadow.
“Sasagawa-san, you have many friends. You don’t need to bother with someone like me.”
The moment he blurted that out with a slightly bitter tone, he realized that he had raised his voice more than he intended, and was overwhelmed by a suffocating sensation. When was the last time he had unleashed his emotions on someone like this?
“Um, well, that’s how it is.”
Kyosuke stood up and fled from the scene.
This was for the best. After talking with her, he understood that Ayano was a good person. She probably wouldn’t spread rumors about him just because he pushed her away like this.
“…”
Taking advantage of her good nature made him feel sick.
Instead of going to the classroom, he headed to the infirmary, dragging his heavy head along.
He laid on the bed, entrusting his consciousness, and before he realized it, it was after school.
The rain, which had stopped once, had started again.
For now, he returned to the classroom to pick up his bag and saw two girls chatting while sharing snacks. They were the usual duo that Ayano often talked to. They glanced at Kyosuke but resumed their conversation with disinterested faces.
Ayano often talked about the duo. They glanced at Kyosuke but resumed their conversation with indifferent faces.
“Do you think Sasagawa-san looks down on us?”
“Yeah, I feel like she’s building a wall between us.”
Their hands, which had reached for their bags, stopped abruptly. Kyosuke directed his gaze at them. The way they picked at their snack food and licked the crumbs off their fingers seemed oddly repulsive.
“She’s ugly and annoying, right?”
“Totally. She acts like she’s so superior.”
Hastily grabbing his bag, Kyosuke hurried out of the classroom. He wanted to get away from them as quickly as possible. Their conversation looped in his head over and over again. Word for word, without a single mistake. His memory, which never seemed to work during class, was now suddenly showing off its power.
He quickly walked towards the entrance, put on his shoes, and grabbed his umbrella. He wanted to go home right away. If he could just eat something, play some games, watch TV, and fall asleep at some random moment, he might be able to forget about it.
Feeling an unpleasant sweat running down his back, Kyosuke hurried out the door.
“Ah, Fujimura-kun!”
Her voice cut through the sound of the pouring rain, vibrating his eardrums. When he looked over, he saw Ayano standing there.
“Weren’t you feeling sick? Are you okay?”
“…Yeah, I guess.”
He mumbled a response as he opened his umbrella.
“Are you waiting for a friend?”
“No, it looks like someone took my umbrella by mistake. It’s just a plastic one, so maybe they got confused.”
As she said this, she cracked a wry smile. Kyosuke looked at his own umbrella. It might be a bit cramped, but it could shelter both of them.
“Achoo!”
A cute sneeze accompanied the mucus dripping from Ayano’s nose. She laughed shyly and said, “I wonder if I caught a cold,” as she took out a tissue and wiped her nose.
“I’ll wait for the rain to stop. See you later.”
She waved her hand slightly and snorted. Just earlier in the cafeteria, he had told her not to meddle. Perhaps she was respecting his wishes.
“…Okay.”
He gripped the handle of his umbrella tightly and turned his back to Ayano.
Each step felt uncomfortable even though there was no water in his shoes. The sound of rain hitting the plastic was grating on his ears.
(“What did she even do…?”)
The girls’ words from the classroom still occupied his thoughts.
If they had talked to her for a bit, they would have realized that Ayano wasn’t the type to look down on others. They would have seen that she was bright, simple-minded, a little foolish, and fun to be around.
Why couldn’t they understand what he himself could see?
If it was jealousy over her beauty, that was absurd too.
Ayano had mentioned being on a diet. Those girls, who spent their time idly snacking, had no right to be jealous.
She was diligent in her work, attended school, and studied.
Yet he had thoughtlessly pushed her away, caused her discomfort, and made her worry.
What on earth was he doing?
Kyosuke stopped walking and let out a heavy sigh.
♥
The rain showed no signs of letting up, and it seemed likely to continue until the following morning. When would I be able to return home? Living alone, I couldn’t ask my parents to pick me up. I had enough money to call a taxi, but I didn’t want to be seen and have others gossip about me. My house wasn’t that far away, but the idea of running through this rain was discouraging.
“…?”
Perhaps they had forgotten something. A student in a school uniform entered through the school gate. A slender body and short stature. My vision was unclear due to the rain, but as the student approached, their silhouette became more distinct. It was a familiar male student.
“Here, I found this in my bag. You can use it.”
In the midst of the poor footing, he had been jogging. Kyosuke said this, out of breath, holding a folding umbrella in one hand.
“…There’s a tag on it. Did you go out of your way to buy it?”
“N-no, I bought it and never used it!”
“Hmmm…”
Kyosuke said, blushing, and pushed the folding umbrella into my hands.
“…Well, I’ll be going then. See you tomorrow.”
As Kyosuke turned on his heels to leave, Ayano reached out her hand. His sleeve was wet from the rain.
“I-“
Before she could think, her lips moved
“Let’s go home together.”
Even if he preferred to be alone, Ayano was convinced that if she didn’t assert herself now, she would regret it later.
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