Chapter 157 Warnings, Madness And Emotions

- POV Freya -

[Stay on guard...]

*Always*

I had left my soldiers outside the great door because they could not go in with me. So I was walking slowly through this great corridor of pillars that was set before me in a special atmosphere. With each step I took, magical symbols appeared on them, lighting my way. Everything was very quiet, almost frozen in time, and I couldn't help but feel alone in another dimension.

In a few seconds, I entered a very large room, the only one in the pantheon, large and silent. Suddenly, the entire room lit up, revealing a display case in the middle with only one thing on it...a book. Only one object was in the room at that moment, and as I looked around, Kira's slightly irritated voice echoed in my mind.

[Don't tell me you did all this for a damn book ???]

*Wait a minute before you judge, I'm sure it's very important...*

In spite of the sentence I had just spoken, I myself was very surprised to find such a large room, so empty with only one object. In my mind, I had imagined a room filled with things, secrets, and magic, but I had never thought of a single book. As I walked towards the center, I felt my heart and breathing quicken as I climbed the few steps to finally find myself in front of that book.

It was quite large, a bit like a grimoire, its cover was black with red lines, sometimes thin, sometimes thick. It was quite simple and against all odds, it didn't tell me anything. I'd had a lot of familiarity with a lot of things since I'd arrived here and I honestly thought that this book would be the centerpiece. I didn't understand and as I put my hand on it, the system manifested itself.

[ Warning ! Unknown magic from this object has been detected ! Magic similar to that of your old system is trying to manipulate your mind ! ]

[ Warning ! The system has discovered a similar magic in the host's mind ! ]

[ Internal cleaning process enabled...36%...48%...66%...73%...88%...ERROR ]

*Eh ?*

[ Activating emergency safety process...40%...55%...67%... ]

[ Error ! The operation failed, the host is not yet able to fight against this unknown magic. Activate last resort before losing system ]

[ Activate "Force unlock host's mind" operation ! Warning : high risk of brain damage, host must remain conscious ! ]

*Wh...?...aaaaah !!*

As I was reading these notifications, an unimaginable pain was seizing my head without warning. At first it was bearable, but as time went on, the pain intensified and would not go away. Everything around me blurred, my vision flickered, my body spasmed and I shook as I had never shaken before. While I was going through all this, Kira's voice was shouting, but I could hardly hear her anymore.

[ FRE....Y...AAA !!!]

I had never been in so much pain, and everything I had been through was nothing compared to what was going through me and making it impossible for me to concentrate. It felt like acid was eating away at every part of my brain, mind and soul as I collapsed to the floor. I had no control over my body, I couldn't and only my pain and screams resonated within me and mattered.

The unbearable pain did not stop as my entire mind became an explosion of information that I could not yet decipher. Like dozens of red balls similar to the one I had seen, my soul seemed to be overwhelmed by it. I couldn't hold on anymore, I could feel my nails scratching my skin and yet I couldn't feel anything. My whole mind was focused on my head, which could burst at any moment.

[ Warning : unconsciousness imminent t! If the host loses consciousness, the damage will be irreversible and the system will fail !]

My vision was blurred, I felt like my eyes were going to pop out of their sockets and I couldn't read what the notifications were saying. Seconds were hours, everything lasted forever as I screamed...I was in pain and at that moment only death could deliver me. My eyes were crying blood, I was vomiting blood and even my ears were filled with it. Why was I going through this ? Why did I have to inflict such pain on myself ? Who ?

[ Alert ! Critical state of mind ! The host is losing her mind !]

[ Mind broken at 30% - the mind can still heal itself but if the host reaches 100% there will be no turning back ]

What was I doing there suffering ? Who was I doing all this for ? For me ? But who was I really ? As the pain slowly took over my mind, the pain prevented me from remembering the purpose of my life. I saw blurred images of people but I couldn't see who they were. There was a little girl and a woman but they were too far away for me to remember.

[ Mind broken at 46% ]

*Leave me...alone...*

I wanted this to stop, I wanted to be left alone and I felt tired, very tired. The pain was as intense as ever and the more time passed, the more I felt my mind breaking into a thousand pieces. Was I going to die ? I didn't know, but I was ready to accept death if it meant no more pain. The same two people appeared again in my almost extinguished mind, but this time accompanied by several others.

[ Mind broken at 58% ]

What did they want ? I felt as if I had forgotten something important, but I did not have the strength to remember. Everything was a blur, everything was pain, blood and despair, and as I fell to the ground, I didn't move, waiting for deliverance. I didn't even know who I was or what I was doing here so why fight ? What did I look like ? What was my name ? All this information seemed to go up in smoke, never to return.

[ Mind broken at 87%...90%... ]

I could feel that soon my mind would be gone and this pain with it and as my eyes closed and my body stopped shaking I smiled. Finally, in my soul I could see a white light, seemingly calling to me as if to reassure me. The further I went, the more the sensation in my body disappeared. I could no longer feel my feet, my legs, and as if I were disappearing completely, only my upper body remained.

[Mind broken at 96%...98%...]

Suddenly, as I was about to walk through that white light, a strange pain made me stop. It was not a headache for it was coming from my shoulder and as I barely opened my eyes I could see what had caused it. A black blade was stuck in it and I could see my blood flowing profusely from the wound. Whose weapon was it ? There was no one here, I was alone, and yet it had gone into my shoulder.

My eyes were half-closed and my vision was blurred and tinged with black but I could still see the sword start to move slightly. With an incredible effort, I looked up a little to see a small hand of ice holding the blade. Who was it ? As I wondered, a new wave of pain shot through me as I saw the blade come out and go back into my shoulder.

*What is it ? *

My gaze was fixed on that blade that seemed increasingly familiar as my eyes finally fell on a small thing hanging from the handle. The small ice hand was shaking but holding that thing as if it were something very precious. I didn't know how this hand got there or why, but at that moment it was pulling the object out and placing it on my chest, right at my heart.

After doing so, the little ice hand disappeared leaving me with this object, resting on my chest. It looked like a small white stuffed animal, tinged with a few drops of blood but strangely still pretty. I didn't want to close my eyes anymore, my mind ignoring the pain as I tried to move. This little thing made me extremely brave as I tried to sit up and get a closer look.

*A...wing ?...I...a lucky charm...I...Sh...Shiro...*

As I looked at this little thing tenderly, that name came out of my mouth like an unconscious whisper. Suddenly, the image I had in my mind of these two people began to become clearer and clearer. The little girl had pure white hair and eyes as purple as gem stones while the woman had flaming crimson hair and beautiful amber eyes.

[ Mind stabilization in progress... ]

[ Forced mind unlocking successful ]

[ The host L?????? now has full access to the space containing her memories which are yet to be discovered ]

Gradually, the pain gave way to my latest memories, which became more and more evident as the seconds passed. Everything came back to me, my mission, the crypt, the Commanders, our battles, the pantheon, and especially my wife, my daughter, and that icy hand. Now I understood perfectly what had happened as a worried voice screamed in my ears to burst my eardrums.

[...R...AA ! F...E..]

*I...*

[F...RE...Y....!! F...FRE...YAA...!! FREYA !!]

*Ki-Kira...*

[Oh my God Freya !! Are you alright ? You...you almost disappeared completely, you...you weren't yourself anymore you were screaming, your body was spasming and you were writhing in pain ! I...our...our bond was about to break and I felt my spirit dissipate along with yours...I...I was so scared ! Forgive me...forgive me for stabbing you twice I...I...I didn't know what to do, I was lost, I was scared and...I thought I was losing you...

As I tried to figure out what had just happened, my little sister's voice screamed in my mind in complete despair. She was speaking at an unbelievable speed, every word was full of distress and sadness. Her voice was shaking as it had never shaken before, and the more she spoke, the more the guilt Kira felt rubbed off on me.

...All those notifications that were ringing and...and saying you were losing your mind...you...I...I panicked and the only thing I could think to do was wake you up with your katana. Sorry....onee-san so...sorry ! I didn't want you to die...I didn't want to die I...]

My mind was still completely lost but the pain had stopped because the system process had stopped. I didn't feel much different but that was probably because I was in even worse shape than before. I had broken ribs, a sword stuck in my shoulder, my right side still had those bite marks and my head felt like it had been crushed by a huge stone.

*Kira...I'm sorry, I don't know what happened, I...don't apologize, please...it's not your fault...and you did the right thing. I...I'm fine...you saved my life, thank you little sister*

[I...I'm glad Freya...I was so scared...]

*Everything is fine now, please don't worry. And you, are you okay ?*

[Y-Yes I'm okay, I'm not the one who suffered... It looks like you almost had a disaster ! The system wasn't compatible and...and that mysterious magic almost brainwashed you, not to mention the forced unlocking that almost destroyed your brain cells and your mind !]

Despite my totally exhausted mental state, I still had the strength to understand what my sister had gone through and what she was explaining to me. On my side, I could not explain what had happened to me and at that moment, it all seemed so far away as if I had just had a bad dream. We didn't have time to say anything else as the notifications were ringing. It had all started because of this manipulative magic and the system was picking up where it left off.

[ Emergency security process resumes...73%...84%...96%...100% ]

[ Mind control has become impossible ]

[ Threat averted ! The item returned to its original state ! ]

As all these notifications rang in my mind, I pulled the katana that was still on my shoulder as I stood up. I staggered around trying to keep my upright, dignified and proud posture that I had all the time. A lot had happened and from what I understood, the information about my identity was now inside me. As I turned my head towards the object responsible for this incident, I could see that it had changed.

This time the cover was totally different because instead of being black and red it was white and red and a symbol was on it. It represented an eye as purple as mine and Shiro's and unlike before I felt something. In addition, there were two letters that appeared and that seemed mysterious to me. They were a large L and a large K in a very refined font.

___

L & K

Nightshade

___

Just below those two letters was a large name written in what seemed to be the language of demons. It said "Nightshade" and as I read the word and ran my fingers over each letter, my hand suddenly became wet. Drops were falling on it and on the cover as I wondered what was going on.

[O-Onee-san, you...]

My little sister's voice was soft for some reason and while I was lost for a few seconds, I finally understood. Those drops of water were coming from me...they were beading on my face before falling silently. I had no control and at that moment my eyes seemed to speak for themselves as for the second time in my life, tears streamed down my cheeks.

I didn't know yet what was in that mysterious book, but what was certain was that the name sounded to me like sweet music, both melancholy and tender. Standing alone in this large room, after having gone through such a mental ordeal...I was crying, without even knowing why, but I was crying.

[N/A: "Nightshade", is the name of a purple flower]

___

FULL STATUS

Name : Freya / L??????

Age : 0 years old / Mentally : 25 years old

Sex : Female

Course: Ice Demon Wolf of Chaos - Adult

Race : Imperial Demon

Unique title (locked): ???? - 10% [ To unlock it, the host must reach 100% ]

Titles : Blessed by Titania, Goddess of endless Chaos and eternal frozen Hell (crossed)

Dragon tamer

Ruthless slayer

Empress of the three colors (crossed)

Level : 45/70

Exp needed for next level: 0 / 46 000

HP : 31 600 / 170 000 MP : 32 610 / 85 000 BLOOD : 100 / 100

Strength: 560

Defense : 560

Agility : 566

Endurance: 563

Speed : 562

Intelligence: 560

Charisma: 500 (imperial she-wolf)

Attribute points to allocate : 600

Married to : Gaya

Daughter : Shiro

Empire (menu)

Subordinates: 1239

Humans killed: 153

Souls: 2/3

Elements: Ice / Chaos

Skills (all):

Attack - Demon Claws (Lvl 5)

- Bite of hell (Lvl 6)

- Infernal ice spikes (Lvl 6)

- Fighting techniques (Lvl max)

- Mastery of the katana (lvl max)

- Demonic Empress aura (lvl 6)

Defense - Ice demon wall (Lvl 6)

- Demonic Cloak (lvl 5)

Pain Resistance (lvl 5)

Attack/Defense - Domain of the Ice Empress "frozen wrath" (lvl 2) - (under condition)

Others - Humanoid form

Demonic form (linked to the title so incomplete) - 10%.

- Ice creation (Lvl 6)

- Storage of chaos (Lvl 4)

- Devouring Chaos (Lvl 5)

- L??????'s Threads of Blood (lvl 1)

- Analysis

- Second soul (Lvl max) - unique

- Telepathy