CH 88

“…”

I was lying on my bed in the same filthy room as yesterday.

As I didn’t even have the willpower to take off my weapon and armor, I was still fully equipped.

The bed might get dirty because of that, but it was already like that before, so I don’t think I’ll get scolded too much for that.

I had no memory of how I came back after my match yesterday.

The reactions of the aristocrats at the arena left a deeper wound in my heart than I expected.

I wasn’t going to feel sorry for myself about not being an aristocrat.

But even if I knew that in my head, my heart still belonged to aristocracy.

I thought I would be acknowledged if I showed results.

I might have even expected to be able to return to aristocracy, as long as I showed promising results.

This is how it turned out.

I was now a fallen aristocrat, and nothing would change that regardless of the results I produced.

It’s no longer possible for me to become an aristocrat.

I can no longer return to that warm life I lead as a child, surrounded by father and mother.

“…I thought I had already given up.”

I started remembering my parents.

My mother was my father’s lawful wife, who also excelled at magic.

Father and mother truly loved me back when I was a child.

They would buy me anything I wanted.

They would always spend time with me on my birthdays, end of the year, or any other milestone.

Father would always show me his light magic if I asked him.

Mother too, would show me her fire magic at every opportunity.

They would sleep in the same bed as me if I pleaded.

They would even read me picture books till I went to sleep.

(When was it? When their eyes stopped seeing me)

Father’s attention went to my elder brother, born from his concubine in the same year as me, who was proficient in magic; while mother’s attention went to my five years younger brother, leaving me nothing.

It all started after the age of 10, when I started my magic training and couldn’t show any results at all.

I should have been able to activate magic within a few months, yet after one year, three years, I couldn’t even use the most basic [Body Strengthening].

Gradually, they began to treat me as if I wasn’t there, and a year ago, right before I left the house even the servants would ignore me.

After leaving home, I was picked up by my aunt, Margravine-sama, and made the head of the pioneering village.

(I thought since I finally found bonds outside, I could forget that my family existed…)

Even if those were the thought inside my head, my heart still wanted to return to when I was a child.

“…I miss you. Kili, Milia.”

I thought about my friends back at the village, one after another.

“Reno, Sui.”

I could feel my frozen heart thaw a little, just by remembering their faces.

I gripped the necklace hanging from my neck.

That alone made my heart even warmer.

“…Lain.”

*Knock* *knock*

While remembering everyone from the village, I heard a knock on the door.

I rose from my bed and looked at its direction.

“Who is it?”

There was no response.

The door gets knocked on again.

Looking out the window, the sun was setting and the sky was turning red.

The match was held early in the morning, so I must have spent a considerable amount of time on the bed.

It’s probably right before dinner time, so it’s not strange for someone to come and let me know.

I haven’t told anyone I’m staying at this inn.

In fact, I didn’t even know anyone from the capital.

“Could it be, Lain?”

Lain might have gotten worried about me and came visiting.

That’s it.

He was acting suspicious while handing me this necklace.

Maybe it had a mechanism which let him know if I ever got depressed.

In that case, he could easily find my location using it.

He would even manage to do something about the distance from here to the village.

After all, he came from a faraway country who’s name I hadn’t even heard before.

That’s it.

That has to be it.

I open the door in a rush.

“La…in?”

The person standing in front of my door wasn’t Lain, but a girl with an aristocratic air around her.