CH 77

When are you going to tell me…

He spoke as if he knew everything. No one knew that Elysia was suffering from PTSD except for herself. While it wasn’t really the case, the Countess, who had seen it in her childhood, knew only that she was sensitive to blood.

“…What are you talking about?”

So, Damon would never know why since it was a secret only she knew. It was something she couldn’t tell anyone. Who would believe the crazy idea of remembering her previous life? Besides, even more, they wouldn’t believe the idea that this place was inside a book.

“Does the wife want me to know nothing?”

“Yes…?”

Elysia kept getting confused by Damon’s attitude of acting like someone who knew everything. These were things he would never know unless he dug into her head.

There was only one time she didn’t faint for the first time after she saw a drop of blood. It was when she ran into that man she didn’t know who as he was lying in an alley the night she fled the County.

“I hate it when you get sick where I can’t see you.”

She was taken aback by the warm touch on her cheek. It was a touch that conveyed a careful feeling and desperation as if she were about to break.

He could easily fool anyone who didn’t know anything. Perhaps, she would have been cheated on a long time ago had she been someone else. Even if she didn’t try so hard, Damon had a deceiving appearance.

“I’m fine…”

Even she, who knew everything, trembled, so it was obvious how he would appear to others. Elysia was so blinded by the sweetness that she wanted to close her eyes and ears.

She had an urge not to worry about anything as she felt the urge just to let him trick her into doing whatever he wanted. Especially his blue eyes, whenever she saw those eyes, she felt strange…. the look in his knowing eyes made her want to open her mouth and tell him everything without realizing it.

“It’s not normal to be so pale and unable to breathe.”

“I…”

The hand that had been carefully caressing her cheek covered her entire face before she knew it. If he gave it even a little bit of strength, she would suffocate and die.

She didn’t know why that came to mind at a moment like this, and she suddenly couldn’t stop thinking. At the time, she was distracted and didn’t realize it though it was actually the first time. How could she be fine even after seeing so much blood like that then?

“Your Grace…”

“Yes. If the wife wouldn’t tell me, I can wait patiently.”

“I’m not hiding anything.”

The two are completely different people, so why did she keep thinking of the man from that day? If it were Damon, he’d never lie there bleeding. No one could have hurt him that much. That was impossible.

On the other hand, that man had been badly wounded by someone, and he was close to dying, although he strangely healed right away.

“If the wife is like that, then I’ll let it be. I always believe in Elysia.”

Lies.

He didn’t really believe her. In the first place, Damon Raphael never trusted others. Even if her memory of the setting was old, that was certain. He didn’t acknowledge anyone but himself, and he didn’t treat others as an equal.

Such a person believed her…

“Yes, so do I.”

“Still, don’t get sick where I can’t see you.”

“Yes, I won’t.”

Elysia didn’t think her marriage to him would be true. She expected it to be filled with lies all over, but she didn’t know that she would spit out words that she didn’t even mean like this. Even though it wasn’t really for each other, they lied so naturally.

“Because the wife doesn’t seem to be able to rest properly when I’m here… I’ll just leave.”

At those words, she didn’t bother holding him back.

Indeed, as Damon said, if he were here, her whole body would be so tense that she couldn’t rest because she couldn’t help but watch his eyes even when she exhaled.

“See you in a little while.”

“Yes.”

Thinking that even the tone of regret was a lie made her feel at ease.

Elysia let out a long sigh of relief only after he had completely left the room. Little by little, her shrunken body straightened out, and her tension began to relax.

“Haa… I finally can breathe.”

Even though she pretended to be okay in his presence, she almost screamed when he grabbed her face as she was so frightened that she thought she would die.

“That man… Will he be okay?”

Again, the man who came to mind at the most unexpected moment was not leaving her mind. Why did she see Damon and think of him? Even at the moment when he might die…

It was strange.

Did she think that man was beaten by Damon? No, it wasn’t. If it was for that reason, there were many other people as well.

The meeting with the man was mysterious from the beginning… To meet a man who had fallen pooled in blood where she was heading. In addition, she should have passed out normally as well, yet she did not faint.

Far from fainting, she tried to save him. If it were blood, her whole body would tremble, and she couldn’t stay sane.

“I also confirmed that everything was fine… he will be fine.”

She had checked that the man’s wounds were healing, perhaps he didn’t die since he had that much tough life force. Nonetheless, she wondered how she didn’t faint. Even if she was immune, it was limited to a small amount of blood. Elysia couldn’t help but faint at the sight of a large amount of blood.

“…Why didn’t I faint?”

Although she asked herself, she couldn’t figure out why. She didn’t even know why she was fine… well, she wasn’t exactly fine.

Memories of the past flashed back once more, and Elysia was afraid.

Still, even as she shuddered, she tried to save the man. She didn’t even know him, and she just came across him by accident.

Was it because she projected her dying self in the manly figure? Rather than collapsing in fear, it seems that she struggled to save her own life. She didn’t want him to die, and she hoped that he would not lose his life like her, who was dying in vain.

“It has nothing to do with me.”

She shook her head as the man continued to haunt her. She had done enough, so the rest was up to him. Her situation was not comfortable enough to worry about a man whom she didn’t even know.

Damon was out though no one came looking for her. It seemed that he gave some orders.

How long has it been since she was able to relax like this?

Until now, Elysia hadn’t been able to properly rest in the Grand Duchy. Since she was nervous because she didn’t know when or where Damon would appear, her eyes kept on straining to keep watch. Even when she was alone in her room, she always kept her tension o edge.

“I can’t…”

The thought that she shouldn’t be ignored or belittled made her anxious. It must have been a lot of stress on her. While Elysia shook her head at the feeling that her eyes were closing, she couldn’t shake her sleep.

Barely getting enough sleep each night also contributed to her tiredness. She was stiff with tension because of Damon, and she barely fell asleep until dawn.

Elysia struggled as she felt her body slowly leaning over, but her body was already buried in the bed.

* * *

“ Elysia.”

Feeling someone shaking her and waking her up, Elysia frowned and waved her hand. She had been sleeping well after a long time, so she didn’t want to be disturbed.

“Wife.”

“Um…”

Sleepy and tired, she pulled the blanket all the way over her head, hoping that the person would leave her alone. Soon came a low chuckle of laughter above her head. Strangely, it was a sound that put her at ease.

“I want you to keep sleeping, but….”

‘Then go ahead, let me sleep.’

Her body, barely asleep, refused to wake up since it had not slept properly for several days and demanded to continue to sleep. Elysia didn’t even realize where this place was.

“I don’t want to wake you up because you’re cute though I have to.”

Who kept calling her cute? Even as she began to wonder, she still didn’t want to open her eyes.

“Wake up, Elysia.”

The sound of the voice whispering in her ear was strange. She even wanted to set it as an alarm tone. It was the first time she had heard such a good voice, and she even wondered if the face would be as handsome as the voice.

“Elysia.”

She loved her name getting called so much that she didn’t want to wake up. Elysia was terrified that it would disappear if she opened her eyes.

“Now, wake up.”

“No…”

Elysia furrowed her brow as much as she could see as her body was lifted up forcefully. She was finally able to sleep after several days.

“Da, no… Your Grace?”

It wasn’t until she opened her eyes that she realized where this place was. She couldn’t believe how much she whined at Damon. It was a miracle that she survived.

“Sorry. I made a mistake…”

“No, it’s fine. I had fun.”

She didn’t know what was fun to him, but she just realized that she had made the biggest mistake. Drunk in her sleep, Elysia thought she was in the past—not herself living in the County, but mistaken herself for Han Seol-ah, an ordinary office worker.

“Why…”

How long she was asleep, it was already dark around her. The sun was still up until she fell asleep… She seemed to have been asleep for quite some time.

“I wanted you to keep sleeping like this, but then you would skip meals twice.”

It seemed that it was why he woke her up to eat. While she was annoyed that she was woken up by something like that, she couldn’t be angry.

“If the wife skips more than two meals, you’ll be sick right away.”

A damaged gastrointestinal system was evident when consecutive meals were skipped. She immediately felt bloated in her stomach, and she couldn’t digest properly, yet that was something only she knew.