Chapter 62

62 62. Regret

“Whose book?” Vanessa and Alex asked simultaneously. Lea said that the baby wasn’t William’s. “Lea’s pregnancy journal?”

William opened the book and turned the first page. He could easily recognize that the cursive handwriting belonged to Paula.

“Pregnancy book ...,” William muttered. “It’s Paula’s,” William said again in a whisper. He was trembling in fear. He was afraid that his dream was not a mere dream but a harsh reality. Paula was truly pregnant!

“Oh, William! Don’t open it, please!” Lisa shouted. She didn’t want William to find the truth about Paula’s affair.

“Lisa, he has to know about his wife’s true face!” Alex said nonchalantly. Lisa was going to argue but relented. She knew that he was right. William deserved to know the truth.

William’s brows furrowed, knowing his parents’ reaction. But, he kept it aside and turned the book’s second page. Unexpectedly, he found a photo of the pregnancy test, showing two red lines. That’s when William was sure about Paula’s pregnancy. He was shocked since he had always cared about protection.

***

November 2,

I had no idea how I got pregnant. My husband always uses protection. Was the condom broken and he didn’t tell me?

.....

As I remember, we never went all the way when we have no rubber or when I am ovulating. Did we ever have sex without protection by mistake? If yes, he must be pulled out before ejaculating.

***

“Oh! You should know that the pull-out method is too risky! If you fail to pull out or are late even for seconds, you will easily get your wife pregnant! Do you know how many sperm are in a drop of semen? More than twenty million!” Vanessa shouted in disbelief.

“Vanessa!” William snapped. “No peeping!”

“Oh, William and Paula were dum dum! If you don’t want a baby, you should think twice before doing stupid sex!” Vanessa continued her rant.

“I told you to stop!” William threw a pillow at his sister.

Vanessa ruffled her hair. She was so hysterical. “Why people have fuck unprotected and surprise when they got the baby in the bum?”

“Vanessa! Language, please!” Now, Lisa’s turn to scold her daughter.

“So, Paula’s baby is yours?” Alex was still confused. “Not Sam’s?”

William’s brows furrowed. “Sam’s?”

“Oh, that bastard made up a story!” Alex gritted his teeth, tightening his fists. “I will make him pay the price! How dare he tell me a lie!”

“Do you ... seriously believe that Paula was having an affair with that brat?” William mocked his parents.

“Oh, it’s rich coming from you,” Alex sneered, “as if you were not.”

William was feeling annoyed. He was about to leave everyone to read the book by himself in peace. He almost jumped back into his room when a piece of pink paper fell onto the floor. He knelt to pick up the paper and open it. It was a letter from Lea.

***

Dear William,

You’re a jerk! I regret wasting my precious years with you. I thought, even if you are married, you still love me and truly want to come back to me when you divorce your wife. But soon, when I first met Paula, I was scared of losing you. She looks smart and bright, who wouldn’t be captivated by her? And it turns out my worry comes true. You chose her and abandoned me.

I tried to win you back. However, I didn’t do it fairly. I wronged you and her, trying to get you separated from her. I didn’t tell you when she collapsed at the charity. I tried to make up a story that there was an affair between Samuel and her. I even came to the hotel after Samuel told me that you saw her again, telling her to back off and leaving a mocking note for you-adding a little amount of money-in her name.

The last thing was, I found her precious book and didn’t give it back to her. That’s why, please give her pregnancy agenda to her as soon as possible, before it’s too late. Don’t make me regret my action, giving you up to her. I hope you can live happily ever after with your family.

(Tell her I just took a glimpse of the book. Not read it. I couldn’t bear imagining your intimacy with her.)

Love, Lea

PS: I didn’t regret mocking you with the note. You deserve it!

***

William exhaled lightly. So, it was Lea who left the note. He gulped, feeling guilty for his ex. She was a kind girl, a goody two shoes. Because of him, she turned into a villain. He was glad that Lea repented and went back to her old self.

Lisa was on a rampage. She called Larissa and asked where Samuel was. Surely, that guy wouldn’t manage to escape from hard punishment this time.

“You already got what you want. Can I read this book by myself?”

William excused himself and locked himself inside his room. Knowing that Paula hid her pregnancy from him, made him feel uneasy. He wanted to read his wife’s book and sort his problems out.

He sat on the couch and turned to the next page. He saw a sonogram with Paula’s name printed on it. It was only a dot, but it could make his heart beat so fast.

Smiling at the picture he was saying, “Hi, baby! I am your dad!” He then continued to read the note.

***

November 3,

I was trying to tell him about my pregnancy but he said that I tricked him and wanted to tie him up in the marriage with the baby. Oh, jerk! If you don’t want the baby, I will keep the baby for myself.

***

“Crap!” William recalled that day when Lea told him she spent the night with another man. He was drinking that day.

Suddenly, faded memories flashed through his mind. He was drunk and forced Paula to satisfy his needs roughly. Something he never did to her. He tore her dress, leaving scratches on her body. He said bad things to her, insulting her in the worst way ever.

William burst into tears. He knew why his father-in-law said that Paula would divorce him no matter what. He didn’t expect that he was unforgivable.

He looked into the ultrasound photo and stroked it tenderly. “Hi, baby, please forgive me ....”