CH 3.34

“…!”

She took a deep breath, opening her eyes and her vision was greeted with her fingertips. Her hand, which in her dream was whipping, wanting to touch something, sadly landed on the bed without grasping anything. It was surely a loud sleep talk one.

She smiled bitterly and lifted herself up before wrapping her head in her hands. A severe headache arose as if something sharp had been poked through her head.

“Ugh!”

Her stomach ached so much, and nausea came running out. She hurriedly covered her mouth with one of her hands, tumbling down from her bed. Lowering her head without much energy, she clutched an empty bowl on the little table beside her bed.

“Ugh, ugh!”

It was probably because she hadn’t eaten much the day before and only sour gastric juice came out. No, to be precise, it was gastric juice mixed with blood.

“…”

Rosé sat down as she watched the red blood spread to the bottom of the bowl.

“… I am already like this. No, this can’t be. It can’t be. There is still time…”

She stammered as if eaten by her terror, and murmured firmly.

Her heart tightened, stifling in fear. She never forgot. She was not insensitive that she forgot her short lifespan. Whereas she just wanted to escape from that truth.

Otherwise, she is too scared, too afraid, too terrified to bear it.

Before she dies, she had wanted to see the man and her child she loved. She had been on a road recklessly aiming for that hope which might led the sky to feel sorry for her, meeting and even got to be near them unexpectedly, even have the honor to breathe in the same space with them.

Her heart should not have any more wishes as they have been fulfilled.

But that was not all.

As she watched her child beside her, she became greedier. For that chance, the desire of being with her child became bigger and bigger. Her greedy was so much that she even wanted Haven and her child to get closer; creating the bond of a real family.

A little longer, the desire to stay by their side and just stay like that.

But the blood she had just vomited seemed to be laughing at herself. Do you think that would be possible? Do you think heaven will allow it?

… It was as if her blood ridiculed her in her dream.

She knew the Haven in her dream was not real. Rather, the dream who appeared must have been caused by her inner consciousness. It must have been just because he wanted to laugh at her wish.

All she can do is do chores around her child.

She is a helpless mother.

“Hooh…”

She had been in a tricky situation ever since the visit of the Queen and the Duchess, which seemed to have resulted to her health to deteriorate.

“Calm down. Don’t be weak.”

Rosé pushed herself, slapped both of her cheeks, and raised her heavy body. Her pajamas were damp, probably from sweating while sleeping. She was in a hurry to wash herself and change her clothes.

Until the late Queen and Duchess go, she needs to be by her side to reassure the child even a bit…

It was then. There was a sudden knock on the door.

She started the morning earlier than the other maids, so it was still too early for anyone to find her room. Rosé hesitated, wondering what was going on, then put on a thin shawl over her pajamas and approached the door, asking cautiously.

“… Who is it?”

“… Nanny?”

The owner of the voice heard from beyond the door was the nanny.

‘Wh, why is the Nanny here… did something happen to Flitta during the night?’

All sorts of thoughts ran through Rosé’s head. She hurriedly opened the door in her concern for her child.

“What happened? Did something happen to the Princess….”

As soon as Rosé opened the door, she asked in an urgent tone without even having time to greet the nanny. Contrary to her worries, however, the nanny’s expression was the same as usual.

“If something happens to the princess, are you saying you can do anything? Do you think I came here to ask you to solve something that if I, myself, can’t help?”

After the nanny cut off without listening to Rosé’s words, she asked with a mocking tone. As if the remnants of last night hadn’t been resolved, the nanny’s gaze at her was fierce.

“No, I just…”

“Prepare and go up to the bedroom of the late queen.”

“… Yes?”

Rosé hurriedly tried to explain her side, but in the end, she looked at the nanny, baffled at her unexpected words.

“What do you mean, Nanny? Why am I under Her Royal Highness…”

“If she commands you, you will do as she says. Why are you babbling so much?”

“Bu, but….”

“Today, Her Highness Queen Sun appointed you as her maid to serve.”

“… Yes?”

Rosé’s eyes widened as she listened to the nanny. Nanny watched her eyes flicker before she opened her mouth again.

“It is an honor to be her maid so hurry up. If it were not for the grace of the late King, how dare you make the Queen wait for a lowly like you…”

“Wa, wait a minute, Nanny!”

Rosé cut off the nanny’s words in the middle. Then she shook her head slowly.

“I’m sorry, but that’s difficult. When the princess wakes up, I have to wash her face and attend to her in the morning.”

“How arrogant you are!”

The nanny listened to Rosé and snorted at her. Then she continued, pressing her forehead with her index finger.

“Is there no one there other than you that works under the Grand Duke? Are you the only maid who will wait on the princess?”

“That’s not what I mean.”

“It’s been a while since you became the princess’s exclusive maid, your nose have soar through the sky.”

The nanny sarcastically pressed Rosé’s forehead again with her index finger. The wind staggered Rosé and backed away. The nurse’s face crumpled when she saw the red hand mark left on her white forehead.

Her fair skin was what every woman dreams of. Old or young, like anyone who wants to be beautiful. That’s why the nanny felt jealous of Rosé’s pure white skin. Skin like that was not for a lowly maid.

‘That’s why she’s playing tricks on the Grand Duke. Because she believes on her fair skin.’

The nanny’s gaze at Rosé grew fiercer. She ordered in a harsher tone than before.

“You don’t have to worry about the Princess, just only need to obey my order.”

“But Nanny.”

Rosé tried to refuse again. To her, the only person more important than anyone else was Flitta; her child.

It was better to brush her child’s hair and wash her body even if the Queen Seon, or someone nobler, told her to take care of her. Flitta was the most important thing in the world for her. To watch Flitta’s small mouth chew while helping her to eat and wipe the food around her mouth.

“Are my words funny? No, are you going to disobey the words of Her Majesty the Queen?”

The voice of the nanny, who had no way of knowing Rosé’s feelings, arouse. Even if she knew, it wouldn’t change anything.

Rosé stopped for a moment, and after silently opening her mouth a few times, she immediately bit it shut. Her slender shoulders drooped just like that.

Queen Seon.

As long as that name mentioned, there was nothing she could do for herself. She said that the former queen directly pointed her out, but how could defy her order?

“… Order received.”

“Perfect! That’s what it should be. Anyway, hurry up and go to Her Highness’ bedroom. Because I have to finish preparing to wait on you before Her Majesty the Queen wakes up.”

The nanny snorted at her and continued her words with her bracing voice, and then she turned around as if she had finished what she had to say. Rosé looked at her back for a moment before sighing.

* * *

As she pulled her red curls into a thin braid and was about to tie her ribbon, a cold voice sounded.

“Again.”

“… I am sorry.”

Rosé hurriedly lowered her head. The fingers that had been untangling her braided hair once again became stiff and unwilling to move. She untied her hair and gently cupped her hands.

“You don’t even know how to properly touch my hair, and yet you’re the princess’s exclusive maid.”

I heard someone whispering behind me. It was the voice of another maid waiting to serve Queen Seon. The previous day, the maid said she had taken care of Queen Seon herself. But today, she suddenly took the role, so as a maid, she would think that her work was taken away.

Rosé sighed as she recalled the maid staring at her with her fierce gaze. She was already being ostracized by her employees, and she have a hunch that it will be worse in the future. That doesn’t mean she can do anything.

She swallowed her wry smile and kneaded her hands, then began braiding the former queen’s hair again.

Before long, however, the languid voice of the former queen interrupted her again.

“Ah, I don’t like this. Do it again.”

(TN’s: This…. hooh!)

“… Yes.”

Maybe it’s a relief that she told Rosé to do it again before tying the ribbon this time. No, it was something that would be repeated many times in the future anyway, so it wouldn’t matter. Nevertheless, Rosé felt somewhat frustrated and answered a beat late.

“The answer is strange. Why, you don’t you want to?”

As if she had noticed the momentary hesitation, the former queen in the mirror looked straight at Rosé, who was standing behind her, and asked. As soon as Rosé ran into Queen Seon’s golden eyes, she immediately lowered her head.

“I dare not, Your Highness. I will do it again.”

“You seem to be dissatisfied with me for finding fault with you?”

“N, no. I don’t dare think so, Your Highness.”

Rosé shook her head and denied the words of the Queen Seon. However, Queen Seon stared at Rosé in the mirror, then twisted the corners of her lips and continued.

“But why do I think you are lying? No matter how I look at it, it seems to make me uncomfortable.”