Canaren soared high and in one breath, she landed right above the entrance to the prison. Armed knights and wizards were guarding the surroundings with bloody eyes. She didn’t have time to explain her circumstances to each one of them. She took a deep breath and tightened her stomach.
“Please move away!”
“Who just… Ahhh!”
The group of people were startled by the fast-falling woman above their head. Beyond the broken door was a dark spiral staircase. Canaren fell as if being sucked into a circular open space.
She slowed down just before she hit the floor, but her reaction prevented her from landing properly. It was best to wrap her body with her wings. Like that, she rolled across the floor.
“…Ouch!”
Her wings were scratched here and there, but there were no major wounds. She brushed the dirt away. The cold, damp air made the gloomy landscape more gloomy.
All the prisons blocked by iron bars were empty. There were puddles of blood all over the hollow floor. The thought of finding Yulif made her unable to feel fear. She bravely walked down the hallway. The stairs appeared again. As she stepped onto the stairs, she heard a hum from below.
“Lord!”
It was Derek’s voice. Canaren descended the stairs as if rolling down. Yulif, who she had been searching for so long, was lying on the cold prison floor. Several people were around him, talking. Derek looked like he was about to cry.
“Oh…”
Canaren’s vision narrowed and all she could see now was Yulif. Frantically, she ran over and hugged Yulif’s head. His complexion was bad. It was so bad that she couldn’t bear to say it was bad. He had no color, as if he had been covered in white paint. Canaren patted his cheek with his eyes. Closed. Please, please!
“Yulif, calm down. Please calm down. It’s me Yulif, look at me.”
“When I die, my body will disappear. Don’t erect a gravestone. Canaren will be sad.”
“What, what are you talking about? Dying? Yulif, don’t lie. You said you won’t die. You’re a great wizard. You are… You won’t die, you told me!”
Canaren’s tears fell on Yulif’s eyelids, on his nose, on his pale cracked lips. Her desperate cry was so heartbreaking that even the hearts of Derek and Duke Theodore broke. Duke Theodore closed his eyes softly.
“Yulif… sorry. I was wrong. I will not suffocate you again. I won’t ask you to love me. If you tell me to stay in the castle for the rest of my life, I will do it. So please, open your eyes. Yes?”
“I want you to look after her, see that she’s happy and doing well.”
“No, no… I’m not sure I can live happily without you. You can live happily with me. Why are you talking like that when I’m here, why the hell!”
“He’s saying that to me… I guess he thinks I’m the only one next to him.”
Derek muttered, holding back his tears. Canaren turned her head to Derek. She thought that it was strange to have a conversation that kept going off and on since before. Yulif… now…
“He can’t hear me…?”
“…Well, I don’t know. I’m pretty sure he doesn’t have any sense of pain or touch, but beyond that… sorry. I’m sorry, Madam Canaren.”
Eventually, Derek broke down in tears. Tears were dripping down from Canaren’s eyes as she shook in confusion and helplessness. Her gaze alternated between Yulif and Derek.
Her voice couldn’t reach Yulif. Yulif didn’t even know she was here. Since when? Why? Why did Yulif, who was the strongest wizard in the empire, become like this? Since when did Derek and Roana know?
‘Why did you hide it from me Yulif, why…’
“Don’t let her die after me. If that would be the case, erase her memory.”
“…Ah…”
She didn’t know anything. What was certain, however, was that Yulif knew this was going to happen from the beginning, and he tried to hide it until the end for fear that she would die after him. The actions of Yulif, which had not been understood for a long time, flashed through her mind as if flipping through the pages of a book.
He smiled sweetly and then pushed her away with a cold hand. He said he didn’t need love, he said he didn’t need her heart, but he told her to stay by his side. Because he didn’t want her to be taken away by the emperor. No, that was an excuse. Because he couldn’t love her. Because, because…
“You’d rather erase my memory.”
“…How, how can you do that?”
‘You’re afraid I will die after you. I don’t want to live in a world without you.’
“…Ugh, why…”
It felt like her heart was burning. It felt like it was being torn apart. It felt like it was freezing. It seemed to have fallen over the deep darkness.
Ugh. Her chest. Her heart hurts so much. Pain. She couldn’t breathe. The hot lump that filled her throat and didn’t even give a hole for a handful of breath to pass through was not tears, but blood spurting from her shattered heart.
It hurts. It hurts so much. However, Canaren couldn’t even be in pain to her heart’s content, thinking that Yulif would have felt more pain than this in a place she didn’t know.
‘Erase my memory. Why are you even trying to save me? Do not die. Live. You can live with me. Why are you giving up on life already? You told me not to give up. You said never to die. Why are you going first?’
Canaren laid Yulif’s head on her lap. Yulif reached out his hand as if reacting to it. She took his hand in a hurry. And she wiped away his tears. ‘Look at this, Yulif is not weak. Don’t die.’ She… she could save him. She spoke to Derek with twinkling eyes.
“Everyone, why are you still? We have to save Yulif. Look at this. He just raised your hand. He has. Call a healing wizard. This is the Imperial Palace, there are many wizards. If you bring them all, they can help Yulif. Yes?”
“…Madam Canaren, that’s not it.”
“She doesn’t have to sacrifice anything for me… Yes.”
Sacrifice…?
After uttering an unexpected sentence, Yulif took a harsh breath and closed his mouth. Canaren shouted at Derek who stood still as if nailed to the spot to hurry up and get a healing wizard.
Then she dropped Yulif’s pocket watch, which had been buried in her clothes. The lid was opened as if the button was pressed as it bumped into Yulif’s chest. Then…
The pocket watch began to glow. A bright and colorful light that had never been seen before flashed and colored Canaren’s vision.
*******
‘Where am I?’
Canaren looked around, but couldn’t see anything except the mysterious aurora that hung like a curtain. The little weight on her knees disappeared. Yulif! Canaren tried to find Yulif, but no voice came out. Her body didn’t even exist and she was floating like a ghost. She felt as if she was dreaming.
“Try it again. Yes?”
“I wish I had done this much.”
“Yulif is smart. You can learn it quickly. Only once. Just once.”
This is my voice… But something is slightly different.
Two people suddenly appeared in front of a puzzled Canaren. One was Yulif, and the other… was herself. However, unlike her current voice, this Canaren exuded a slightly different atmosphere than her now. She was a little older, a little more mature, a little more calm. And… She seemed to have given up or resigned from something.
“Listen carefully and say it. 「To you, from the east.”
“……「You, the, east」 Hang on. I can’t.”
“When are you going to talk to me in Hwira?”
“I’ve memorized all the letters, so do it in writing. What do you mean by the words you just taught me?”
“You don’t know? If you follow me diligently, I might be able to teach you.”
The woman playfully closed her eyes. Yulif looked at her closely, and finally smiled as he sighed. Canaren’s heart was pounding at his natural smile. She was confused.
Where the hell was this? It seemed to be the scene when Yulif first learned their language. It’s too much to be a dream… It’s so realistic. His voice, his eyes, his actions, everything is vivid.
For a moment there was silence and darkness. As they retreated, the setting flickered like a scene of a play. It was a blood-soaked audience. Behind the ornately decorated throne hung two pairs of wings. White, large, blood-soaked. Even if no one told her, Canaren knew. Those wings were her own.
“Feed it to Yulif yourself, or put a sword in his heart. Then I’ll save the villagers. One life would save dozens. My last mercy. Come on, go.”
The emperor forced a vial and a dagger into the woman’s hand. She approached Yulif with tears in her eyes. Yulif was kneeling on the floor with an expression full of pain.
She kissed Yulif like that. It was a short kiss. And then, a beautiful smile and a gentle confession.
「I love you.」
She poured the poison from the vial into her mouth. Yulif took her as she collapsed and held her in his arms. Arghhhhh…! The bloody roar of a beast shook Canaren’s heart and soul.
What is she seeing? Is it a nightmare? What a terrifying and vivid nightmare. Canaren, who wanted to cover her ears, but had no physical body, just waited for the end of Yulif’s scream.
Unexpectedly. She remembered what Yulif had said. Yulif’s answer to her question, ‘Why don’t you marry your beloved?’
“She’s dead.”
“I killed her.”
“You look like her.”
Something he had said a long time ago came to mind. The answer to the question: She was surprised to see him fluent in Hwira.
“I will become the wind that blows from the east towards you.”
“I want to meet her.”
“There are things I couldn’t say.”
“Even if we meet again, it’s something I can’t say.”
The scattered fragments gathered and became a single truth within Canaren.
If… If what she saw wasn’t a dream. If it was reality. Nonsense, but if that’s true.
The person that was killed, the person Yulif loved.
Canaren. She was his beloved.
