Volume 5 - CH 2
P. 50
P. 54
Like she feared, the coblynau wasn’t listening to Lydia’s denial at all.
“My ancestor had been personally asked by Lady Gwendolyn to watch over and take care of this moonstone. I call this one by the name Bow, and I can grasp what is happening to it like it’s a part of my body. So please feel reassured in my care.”
He picked up the ring that was on Lydia’s palm with both of his hands and checked it from all angles. When she thought the fairy looked done, he put it back on Lydia’s finger.
“Ahh, now it’s a perfect fit.”
What!? she thought and lifted her hand up, to see that the size of the ring - which should have been too big for her - was now resting comfortably around her finger. Not only that-
“It’s not coming off!” gasped Lydia.
“We can’t allow you to drop and lose it.”
“That’s not the point, please take it off.”
“The only one who can take it off is the Earl. There should be no point in taking it off in front of other men.”
Oh, you have to be joking!
Lydia tried with all the strength in her body to pull the ring off, but the fairy sat himself on the table, put a pipe in its mouth, made a satisfied look and started to have smoke, so she couldn’t convince him to change this.
P. 55
“By the way, My Lady Queen, I would like to pay my greetings to the Blue Knight Earl, may I ask where exactly he could be?”
“He isn’t here!”
“Oh, now, is the Earl living separate from My Lady Queen and making you live in such a shabby, small house like this?"
“Sorry for being small and shabby. That’s not the point; we aren’t married, so we don’t live together! So, don’t call me your Queen!”
Lydia was finally starting to become irritated.
“Ohh, so the two of you are still in your engagement period. No wonder this place didn’t look like the grand mansion of the Earl. But, still, your treatment is quite poor. If the two of you were to be engaged, then you would need the appropriate number of dresses and jewels. Oh, yes, I know, I will go and provide my counsel in that matter.”
“I don’t need that!”
Edgar would get overly-excited and definitely get carried away.
“Now, don’t go and do something without me asking for it. Or else, whether you are the manager of the moonstone or not, I’ll kick you out! Because I am a Fairy Doctor!”
When she was about to throw some hawthorn fruit at it, the Coblynau vanished with a poof.
She couldn’t go out in public with the engagement ring on her ring finger. It would also be too much hassle if her father were to notice it.
P. 56
Since morning, Lydia was hiding her left hand and ate her breakfast, but however much she tried, she couldn’t hold her fork as usual, so she ended up drinking only tea.
“Lydia, are you not feeling well?”
When she was the fastest one to put down her napkin, her father asked her with a worried look on his face.
“N-no, I’m fine. I just wanted to leave early today."
“Is there that much work piled up for you to do?”
“Well, more or less.”
She wanted to leave before he noticed the ring, so Lydia quickly stood up, but her father spoke to stop her.
“About the Earl Ashenbert-”
“Huh, what?”
“No, uh, I just happened to hear a rumor. That you and the Earl were courting….”
“Ohh, yes, he is surrounded with such rumors. Every woman he happens to meet, ends up being rumored to be courting him, so that proves rumors are just troublesome and really unreliable, aren’t they?”
Lydia rushed as she made up an excuse.
“……You’re right. There could be no such thing.”
“No such thing,” she echoed.
P. 57
“Well, how do you put it, I’m sure there are plenty of women who are fit for the Earl, but courting that doesn’t end with marriage is only a dishonor for the woman. I know that you can stand on your feet and think for yourself, so I don’t think you would be tricked, but-”
Lydia’s father let out a sigh and pushed up his round spectacles and continued his conversation.
“But, if in the case you had some kind of trouble, I want you to come to me for advice. I may be a father who lets you go free and don’t interfere and unreliable, but I am still your parent.”
Oh, she knew she was making him worry. But, she couldn’t let herself confess about the engagement. And, it wasn’t like she really wanted to get married, so that would just make him more worried with the misunderstanding that she may be fooled around with.
“Father, the one who I’m going to choose is a serious and earnest man like you.”
Of course, Lydiawas serious about that.
That’s why - although she didn’t hate Edgar - he wasn’t the type who could be her marriage partner.
I need to hurry up and make him take off the ring.
*
The name of the shop was Madam Eve Palace. It was rumored to be a building where the nobles could hide their mistresses, but only ones who knew the truth were the customers.
It was a business where newcomers needed to be recommended by a current customer to join, and Edgar had his name on the list of customers, and when he stepped out of his carriage in front of the store’s gates, he was immediately escorted into the building by one of the servants who practically came tumbling out.
Even though it was day, the rooms had their curtains closed and the hanging chandelier lit up the room so bright it was almost blinding to the eye.
P. 70
He walked along the deep crimson carpet that spread down the hallway into the back of the building and came to where he was looked down by a marble female statue that was lined up evenly.
The smoke that faintly filled the air made one’s mind grow dull as it made the mind fall under a trance. There must already be someone who had fallen under that sweet aroma and was basking in a daydream about his own harem that was always waiting for him beyond those quiet doors.
The one who was guiding him had changed to another before he had realized it, from the servant who also acted as a bodyguard to a woman who wore a thin cloth over her head.
Eventually, he and his female guide arrived before a double-door at the end of a hallway and the woman opened the door by turning its golden doorknobs for him as she humbly lowered her head.
Edgar stepped through the door.
The room inside was decorated with gold and silver ornaments and garnitures and was only lit by a faint lamp that left the room dark.
The colorfully patterned Persian rug was spread out on the floor decorating the space beneath his feet and the room had fine ebony chairs and tables that played the room down nice and calmly.
In the back of that room, a calico printed chintz curtain was hung, making a temporary wall and divided the room. He could see through the transparently thin cloth, and saw that there was a long and slender sofa on the other side.
He could also see that there was someone sitting on it.
Edgar approached that person who had long hair and a slender figure.
P. 71
*
P. 78
Edgar had left the Ashenbert mansion in the afternoon and returned in the evening.
Lydia wanted to make sure he would take off the ring before she had to go home so she invited herself to his salon again.
“Edgar! ……Uh.”
She lost her momentum because the expression on his face which was reflecting in the glass window he stood by was an near frightening stern look.
It was the cruel and heartless side of Edgar that Lydia was unable to understand.
“Um, if you’re busy, then I’ll come back later….”
“Lydia, you know there is no such thing as being so busy that I have to send you away,”
The man who turned around and said that was the usual Edgar with his irreverent, highhanded kind of smile.
“Did you come to have a last look of your fiancé’s face before you went home?”
“How many times do I have to say that’s wrong? More importantly, this ring…..”
“Can I hug you?”
“Huhh?”
Edgar was already standing in front of Lydia and didn’t show any signs of goofing around or joking, and just looked down at her longingly with his ash mauve eyes.
“N-no, you can’t.”
P. 79
P. 80
Lydia was made to say that mostly from reflex.
“Just one minute,” he negotiated.
“That’s too long.”
“Then thirty seconds.”
Surprisingly he didn’t appear to have any lust about him, but she felt like he just wanted to cuddle up to her like a small child, and that made Lydia say a reply that surprised even herself.
“……If it’s ten seconds, then,”
She wasn’t allowed a moment to take back her reply, as she was swept into his arms.
I wonder if he went through something painful.
While she thought that, she wished she could be of some help, but in the end, Lydia couldn’t release the tension in herself and remained stiff and rigid, so that might have not helped comfort him in any way.
She wasn’t sure if the ten seconds had passed or not, and Edgar didn’t show any signs like he was going to let go, and what made Lydia shift herself to hint to him to let go was the faint smell like an Eastern, Oriental aroma.
“Where did you go?”
“Paul’s studio.”
That’s a lie.
She was always refusing and couldn’t be a comfort to him, so she didn’t have a right to question where his whereabouts was like a lover.
P. 81
And yet, she felt disappointment for some reason and didn’t realize that she had let out a sigh.
“Lord Edgar, I heard that you were injured,” said Ermine, who came into the salon carrying a medicine case.
“What, injured? Is that true, Edgar?”
When she took a good look, there was a cut in the shoulder of his coat where blood was seeping out.
“Ohh, just a little. I was suddenly cut with a knife in an alley, but this is nothing. I don’t know who the person is, but that person must have gotten a much more serious injury.”
Raven must have been the one who did that.
If it was to protect his master, then he would release his warrior instincts and attack.
“Hey, isn’t the power of the diamond’s curse still working on you?” asked Lydia.
“Now that you say that, I think I did see a black cat,” recalled Edgar.
“Edgar, are you by chance frequently meeting with the…..uh, the person who you gave the diamond to?”
“If so, will the curse still stay with me?”
So you’re admitting that you’re meeting her?
Lydia was unrelated to that, yet she became irritated.
“At this rate, it will be very dangerous.”
P. 82
“If it would make you concerned for me, then it isn’t so bad to be cursed.”
You’re so quite to joke around.
“Lord Edgar, I would like to disinfect your wound, so please take off your clothes,” said Ermine crisply and made him sit in a chair.
“Lydia, would you give me a hand?”
“What!”
“It would be helpful if you unbuttoned this for me. My arm hurts so much I can’t move it.”
“You were moving it just fine a second ago!”
Why does a young girl in the first flush of her youth have to help a man take off his clothes?
She turned around her heels as she steamed in rage.
“If you keep joking around, I will pour a grateful amount of antiseptics on you.”
Lydia glanced over at Edgar out of the corner of her eye as he was scolded by Ermine and replied ‘Yes, yes, all right’ and did as he was told and left the room with that.
I wonder if Ermine isn’t that embarrassed with doing something like that.
Ermine seemed to be used to treating wounds, so most likely she must not mind if Edgar took off his clothes or not right in front of her.
Even if she was in the servant position to Edgar, Ermine appeared like she was allowed to say what she wanted, and so that made them look like they had a more relaxed, friendliness atmosphere between them.
P. 83
Lydia carried that feeling ever since the first time she met the two of them.
In order to escape from Prince, Edgar was a leader in front of his comrade and friends and Ermine had said before that that solitary position made him alone. But, if he had friends or allies who he could open up his weakness to, then she guessed that someone would be Ermine.
During the time he was in the most pain and anguish, the one who most likely supported Edgar was Ermine.
When she thought about that, Lydia had the feeling she was becoming depressed.
Edgar asked Lydia if he could hold her, but she felt like his treatment of her was careless and rough.
If it was Ermine, then she would answer him by putting her arms around him.
In this moment, in the room that Lydia came running out of, she imagined the sight of the two of them cuddling up next to each other, and dashed to her office.
She let out a sigh after realizing that she missed the opportunity to ask him to take off the ring.
*
"Lord Edgar, I have bad news,” said Ermine as she wrapped a bandage around his shoulder and arm.
“Jimmy has disappeared.”
P. 84
Edgar immediately had a bad image run through his mind.
“What do you mean?” he questioned.
“He apparently was eavesdropping on the conversation between the adults. They were making a plan to sneak into the estate of Duke Barkston as servants so they could get information about his movements, but Jimmy went ahead without telling anyone.”
“Then, he was captured?”
“It seems so. There was a fingernail-like object that was sent back to them, most likely from Ulysses. There is no way to determine if it is his or not,” added Ermine.
In a drastically swift second, Edgar’s mind went through numerous different ideas. But first, he wanted to verify something.
“Was that conversation the only one Jimmy heard?”
He asked that as he thought if Slade were to hear this, he would say Edgar was heartless.
“The one who knew about the most important information wasn’t in the group Jimmy was listening to, so he shouldn’t have heard anything about the plan.”
But still, he might have found out that Edgar was the one who had the ‘Nightmare.’
“Which means the problem at hand would be how Ulysses will use Jimmy from now.”
That could be something of a problem which could cause friction between Edgar and the ‘Scarlet Moon’ members.
While there was a young boy who would jump into danger from his devotion to Edgar, on the other hand, there were elder members who were concerned about that.
P. 85
Just as Slade had been saying, there might be quarrels that could arise within the organization.
Or that also could have been Ulysses’ intention, and so there was still a possibility that he would brutally butcher up Jimmy in order to stretch the gap between the ‘Scarlet Moon’ and Edgar.
“Ermine, I want to rescue him somehow.”
“I will gather information on where he might be held.”
But, in the corner of his mind, there was a feeling like there would be no hope of they boy being alive after falling into the hands of Ulysses.
And yet, Edgar felt disgusted and loathed at himself for not getting disturbed or hysterical about that.
When it was the time with Jean, or anyone else, even the incident with Ermine, he wondered if there was something wrong with him for not being able to become disordered or lose his calm.
Quickly finishing wrapping the bandage, Ermine opened up a new, clean shirt. As he took it, he remembered, out of the blue, about how he asked Lydia if he could embrace her.
It wasn’t enough. She wasn't opening up to him that easily.
At the start, he was only planning to keep her by his side without paying any attention to her feelings. If Edgar had Lydia with him, then he would be able to successfully continue being the Blue Knight Earl.
But, Lydia said his ‘seriousness’ wasn’t love at all.
He considered his feelings as love so he couldn’t understand what she meant.
P. 86
And yet, if forcing himself on her appeared like he was being unfaithful from her perspective, then he came to the conclusion that he shouldn’t pressure her for a simple kiss.
In regards to Lydia, it was true he was beginning to lose his confidence, but he had no intention of giving up. There was no need to hurry.
It was just, he was annoyed at being unsatisfied, and that made him lose the steadiness in his heart, and then, he started to feel like everything wasn’t going to go well, and that made him depressed.
P. 54
Like she feared, the coblynau wasn’t listening to Lydia’s denial at all.
“My ancestor had been personally asked by Lady Gwendolyn to watch over and take care of this moonstone. I call this one by the name Bow, and I can grasp what is happening to it like it’s a part of my body. So please feel reassured in my care.”
He picked up the ring that was on Lydia’s palm with both of his hands and checked it from all angles. When she thought the fairy looked done, he put it back on Lydia’s finger.
“Ahh, now it’s a perfect fit.”
What!? she thought and lifted her hand up, to see that the size of the ring - which should have been too big for her - was now resting comfortably around her finger. Not only that-
“It’s not coming off!” gasped Lydia.
“We can’t allow you to drop and lose it.”
“That’s not the point, please take it off.”
“The only one who can take it off is the Earl. There should be no point in taking it off in front of other men.”
Oh, you have to be joking!
Lydia tried with all the strength in her body to pull the ring off, but the fairy sat himself on the table, put a pipe in its mouth, made a satisfied look and started to have smoke, so she couldn’t convince him to change this.
P. 55
“By the way, My Lady Queen, I would like to pay my greetings to the Blue Knight Earl, may I ask where exactly he could be?”
“He isn’t here!”
“Oh, now, is the Earl living separate from My Lady Queen and making you live in such a shabby, small house like this?"
“Sorry for being small and shabby. That’s not the point; we aren’t married, so we don’t live together! So, don’t call me your Queen!”
Lydia was finally starting to become irritated.
“Ohh, so the two of you are still in your engagement period. No wonder this place didn’t look like the grand mansion of the Earl. But, still, your treatment is quite poor. If the two of you were to be engaged, then you would need the appropriate number of dresses and jewels. Oh, yes, I know, I will go and provide my counsel in that matter.”
“I don’t need that!”
Edgar would get overly-excited and definitely get carried away.
“Now, don’t go and do something without me asking for it. Or else, whether you are the manager of the moonstone or not, I’ll kick you out! Because I am a Fairy Doctor!”
When she was about to throw some hawthorn fruit at it, the Coblynau vanished with a poof.
She couldn’t go out in public with the engagement ring on her ring finger. It would also be too much hassle if her father were to notice it.
P. 56
Since morning, Lydia was hiding her left hand and ate her breakfast, but however much she tried, she couldn’t hold her fork as usual, so she ended up drinking only tea.
“Lydia, are you not feeling well?”
When she was the fastest one to put down her napkin, her father asked her with a worried look on his face.
“N-no, I’m fine. I just wanted to leave early today."
“Is there that much work piled up for you to do?”
“Well, more or less.”
She wanted to leave before he noticed the ring, so Lydia quickly stood up, but her father spoke to stop her.
“About the Earl Ashenbert-”
“Huh, what?”
“No, uh, I just happened to hear a rumor. That you and the Earl were courting….”
“Ohh, yes, he is surrounded with such rumors. Every woman he happens to meet, ends up being rumored to be courting him, so that proves rumors are just troublesome and really unreliable, aren’t they?”
Lydia rushed as she made up an excuse.
“……You’re right. There could be no such thing.”
“No such thing,” she echoed.
P. 57
“Well, how do you put it, I’m sure there are plenty of women who are fit for the Earl, but courting that doesn’t end with marriage is only a dishonor for the woman. I know that you can stand on your feet and think for yourself, so I don’t think you would be tricked, but-”
Lydia’s father let out a sigh and pushed up his round spectacles and continued his conversation.
“But, if in the case you had some kind of trouble, I want you to come to me for advice. I may be a father who lets you go free and don’t interfere and unreliable, but I am still your parent.”
Oh, she knew she was making him worry. But, she couldn’t let herself confess about the engagement. And, it wasn’t like she really wanted to get married, so that would just make him more worried with the misunderstanding that she may be fooled around with.
“Father, the one who I’m going to choose is a serious and earnest man like you.”
Of course, Lydiawas serious about that.
That’s why - although she didn’t hate Edgar - he wasn’t the type who could be her marriage partner.
I need to hurry up and make him take off the ring.
*
The name of the shop was Madam Eve Palace. It was rumored to be a building where the nobles could hide their mistresses, but only ones who knew the truth were the customers.
It was a business where newcomers needed to be recommended by a current customer to join, and Edgar had his name on the list of customers, and when he stepped out of his carriage in front of the store’s gates, he was immediately escorted into the building by one of the servants who practically came tumbling out.
Even though it was day, the rooms had their curtains closed and the hanging chandelier lit up the room so bright it was almost blinding to the eye.
P. 70
He walked along the deep crimson carpet that spread down the hallway into the back of the building and came to where he was looked down by a marble female statue that was lined up evenly.
The smoke that faintly filled the air made one’s mind grow dull as it made the mind fall under a trance. There must already be someone who had fallen under that sweet aroma and was basking in a daydream about his own harem that was always waiting for him beyond those quiet doors.
The one who was guiding him had changed to another before he had realized it, from the servant who also acted as a bodyguard to a woman who wore a thin cloth over her head.
Eventually, he and his female guide arrived before a double-door at the end of a hallway and the woman opened the door by turning its golden doorknobs for him as she humbly lowered her head.
Edgar stepped through the door.
The room inside was decorated with gold and silver ornaments and garnitures and was only lit by a faint lamp that left the room dark.
The colorfully patterned Persian rug was spread out on the floor decorating the space beneath his feet and the room had fine ebony chairs and tables that played the room down nice and calmly.
In the back of that room, a calico printed chintz curtain was hung, making a temporary wall and divided the room. He could see through the transparently thin cloth, and saw that there was a long and slender sofa on the other side.
He could also see that there was someone sitting on it.
Edgar approached that person who had long hair and a slender figure.
P. 71
*
P. 78
Edgar had left the Ashenbert mansion in the afternoon and returned in the evening.
Lydia wanted to make sure he would take off the ring before she had to go home so she invited herself to his salon again.
“Edgar! ……Uh.”
She lost her momentum because the expression on his face which was reflecting in the glass window he stood by was an near frightening stern look.
It was the cruel and heartless side of Edgar that Lydia was unable to understand.
“Um, if you’re busy, then I’ll come back later….”
“Lydia, you know there is no such thing as being so busy that I have to send you away,”
The man who turned around and said that was the usual Edgar with his irreverent, highhanded kind of smile.
“Did you come to have a last look of your fiancé’s face before you went home?”
“How many times do I have to say that’s wrong? More importantly, this ring…..”
“Can I hug you?”
“Huhh?”
Edgar was already standing in front of Lydia and didn’t show any signs of goofing around or joking, and just looked down at her longingly with his ash mauve eyes.
“N-no, you can’t.”
P. 79
P. 80
Lydia was made to say that mostly from reflex.
“Just one minute,” he negotiated.
“That’s too long.”
“Then thirty seconds.”
Surprisingly he didn’t appear to have any lust about him, but she felt like he just wanted to cuddle up to her like a small child, and that made Lydia say a reply that surprised even herself.
“……If it’s ten seconds, then,”
She wasn’t allowed a moment to take back her reply, as she was swept into his arms.
I wonder if he went through something painful.
While she thought that, she wished she could be of some help, but in the end, Lydia couldn’t release the tension in herself and remained stiff and rigid, so that might have not helped comfort him in any way.
She wasn’t sure if the ten seconds had passed or not, and Edgar didn’t show any signs like he was going to let go, and what made Lydia shift herself to hint to him to let go was the faint smell like an Eastern, Oriental aroma.
“Where did you go?”
“Paul’s studio.”
That’s a lie.
She was always refusing and couldn’t be a comfort to him, so she didn’t have a right to question where his whereabouts was like a lover.
P. 81
And yet, she felt disappointment for some reason and didn’t realize that she had let out a sigh.
“Lord Edgar, I heard that you were injured,” said Ermine, who came into the salon carrying a medicine case.
“What, injured? Is that true, Edgar?”
When she took a good look, there was a cut in the shoulder of his coat where blood was seeping out.
“Ohh, just a little. I was suddenly cut with a knife in an alley, but this is nothing. I don’t know who the person is, but that person must have gotten a much more serious injury.”
Raven must have been the one who did that.
If it was to protect his master, then he would release his warrior instincts and attack.
“Hey, isn’t the power of the diamond’s curse still working on you?” asked Lydia.
“Now that you say that, I think I did see a black cat,” recalled Edgar.
“Edgar, are you by chance frequently meeting with the…..uh, the person who you gave the diamond to?”
“If so, will the curse still stay with me?”
So you’re admitting that you’re meeting her?
Lydia was unrelated to that, yet she became irritated.
“At this rate, it will be very dangerous.”
P. 82
“If it would make you concerned for me, then it isn’t so bad to be cursed.”
You’re so quite to joke around.
“Lord Edgar, I would like to disinfect your wound, so please take off your clothes,” said Ermine crisply and made him sit in a chair.
“Lydia, would you give me a hand?”
“What!”
“It would be helpful if you unbuttoned this for me. My arm hurts so much I can’t move it.”
“You were moving it just fine a second ago!”
Why does a young girl in the first flush of her youth have to help a man take off his clothes?
She turned around her heels as she steamed in rage.
“If you keep joking around, I will pour a grateful amount of antiseptics on you.”
Lydia glanced over at Edgar out of the corner of her eye as he was scolded by Ermine and replied ‘Yes, yes, all right’ and did as he was told and left the room with that.
I wonder if Ermine isn’t that embarrassed with doing something like that.
Ermine seemed to be used to treating wounds, so most likely she must not mind if Edgar took off his clothes or not right in front of her.
Even if she was in the servant position to Edgar, Ermine appeared like she was allowed to say what she wanted, and so that made them look like they had a more relaxed, friendliness atmosphere between them.
P. 83
Lydia carried that feeling ever since the first time she met the two of them.
In order to escape from Prince, Edgar was a leader in front of his comrade and friends and Ermine had said before that that solitary position made him alone. But, if he had friends or allies who he could open up his weakness to, then she guessed that someone would be Ermine.
During the time he was in the most pain and anguish, the one who most likely supported Edgar was Ermine.
When she thought about that, Lydia had the feeling she was becoming depressed.
Edgar asked Lydia if he could hold her, but she felt like his treatment of her was careless and rough.
If it was Ermine, then she would answer him by putting her arms around him.
In this moment, in the room that Lydia came running out of, she imagined the sight of the two of them cuddling up next to each other, and dashed to her office.
She let out a sigh after realizing that she missed the opportunity to ask him to take off the ring.
*
"Lord Edgar, I have bad news,” said Ermine as she wrapped a bandage around his shoulder and arm.
“Jimmy has disappeared.”
P. 84
Edgar immediately had a bad image run through his mind.
“What do you mean?” he questioned.
“He apparently was eavesdropping on the conversation between the adults. They were making a plan to sneak into the estate of Duke Barkston as servants so they could get information about his movements, but Jimmy went ahead without telling anyone.”
“Then, he was captured?”
“It seems so. There was a fingernail-like object that was sent back to them, most likely from Ulysses. There is no way to determine if it is his or not,” added Ermine.
In a drastically swift second, Edgar’s mind went through numerous different ideas. But first, he wanted to verify something.
“Was that conversation the only one Jimmy heard?”
He asked that as he thought if Slade were to hear this, he would say Edgar was heartless.
“The one who knew about the most important information wasn’t in the group Jimmy was listening to, so he shouldn’t have heard anything about the plan.”
But still, he might have found out that Edgar was the one who had the ‘Nightmare.’
“Which means the problem at hand would be how Ulysses will use Jimmy from now.”
That could be something of a problem which could cause friction between Edgar and the ‘Scarlet Moon’ members.
While there was a young boy who would jump into danger from his devotion to Edgar, on the other hand, there were elder members who were concerned about that.
P. 85
Just as Slade had been saying, there might be quarrels that could arise within the organization.
Or that also could have been Ulysses’ intention, and so there was still a possibility that he would brutally butcher up Jimmy in order to stretch the gap between the ‘Scarlet Moon’ and Edgar.
“Ermine, I want to rescue him somehow.”
“I will gather information on where he might be held.”
But, in the corner of his mind, there was a feeling like there would be no hope of they boy being alive after falling into the hands of Ulysses.
And yet, Edgar felt disgusted and loathed at himself for not getting disturbed or hysterical about that.
When it was the time with Jean, or anyone else, even the incident with Ermine, he wondered if there was something wrong with him for not being able to become disordered or lose his calm.
Quickly finishing wrapping the bandage, Ermine opened up a new, clean shirt. As he took it, he remembered, out of the blue, about how he asked Lydia if he could embrace her.
It wasn’t enough. She wasn't opening up to him that easily.
At the start, he was only planning to keep her by his side without paying any attention to her feelings. If Edgar had Lydia with him, then he would be able to successfully continue being the Blue Knight Earl.
But, Lydia said his ‘seriousness’ wasn’t love at all.
He considered his feelings as love so he couldn’t understand what she meant.
P. 86
And yet, if forcing himself on her appeared like he was being unfaithful from her perspective, then he came to the conclusion that he shouldn’t pressure her for a simple kiss.
In regards to Lydia, it was true he was beginning to lose his confidence, but he had no intention of giving up. There was no need to hurry.
It was just, he was annoyed at being unsatisfied, and that made him lose the steadiness in his heart, and then, he started to feel like everything wasn’t going to go well, and that made him depressed.
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