CH 1.1

The neighbourhood where Sejin lived was the place where the sun reached the fastest. It was so close to the sky that you could reach it with just your hand, so the seasons came the earliest. Even if they lived in a place overlooking the world, the locals longed for the lower neighbourhood. So they went to work from dawn and worked until late at night, but their poverty only grew deeper and deeper.

Sejin lived alone with his older brother. Their father was hit by a brick at a construction site and was bedridden in the hospital like a vegetative person for several months. Their mother was busy lamenting her condition over alcohol and tobacco companions, so she didn’t have time to take care of their father. He had even witnessed his mother holding a bottle of wine while in her womb.

On Christmas, it was chilling to the bones, his mother, who was drunk that day too, was found frozen to death on the street in the neighbourhood. After that, Christmas became a nightmare for Sejin.

“Beautiful. As beautiful as your mother. But don’t take after the fate of your mother who was caught committing adultery and froze to death.”

A grandmother, who sat on a backstreet bench, babbled as she showed her only a couple of teeth left. She expressed her concerns about everything about Sejin; that misfortune happened in succession, and his cursed fate of being a foolish brother’s younger brother.

Sejin was not worried about the future, nor was he angry about the reality he was in now. He was just out of breath every day and had no time to worry about the future. When the grandmother motioned for him to come forward while holding out a piece of candy, he frowned and speeded up his walking.

Sejin’s house was in the middle of a sloping neighbourhood. Like any other house, it was closely attached to the house next door, and cement was applied to the gap between the slanted roof and cracked walls. When he opened the door, the glass supported by tape rattled. He took off his shoes and walked in, and a faint smell of exhaustion wrinkled the tip of his nose. When he passed the kitchen and entered the room, he saw his brother sitting in a daze. He walked straight ahead and picked up the blanket. As expected, a catastrophe had happened in his brother’s tracksuit.

“Ah, seriously! When did you take off the diaper? You were wearing it until I came, weren’t you?”

The older brother had the look of a dog that had been kicked.

“… I don’t like it. It’s wet and it hurts…”

The older brother was 21 years old, but he spoke formally to his middle school aged brother. He didn’t go to college or work. Without a diaper, he would make the whole room a sea of ​​urine, and if someone didn’t take care of it, it would stink for days and days. The older brother had a room with only bedding and hangers, and in his world, the younger brother was the most feared guardian. The locals called such an older brother a fool. Sejin hated people who called him that, and was ashamed of his older brother who was called that.

The church choir sister had said that his older brother had a heartbreaking illness. And that he was trapped in his own world and that he missed the time of his treatment, so the disease had deepened. Sejin was sorry that he didn’t know that and criticised him, but it didn’t change that he didn’t help.

When Sejin glared at him fiercely, the other touched his greasy hair and avoided his gaze. He dragged his brother into the kitchen. He took off his pants and poured cold water to the bottom.

“It’s cold! It’s cold!”

“So who’s going to take off the diaper? There is no hot water because the gas is cut off and the boiler is broken… Hey! Aren’t you coming here?!”

The older brother could not stand the ice-cold water and ran to the corner of the kitchen. Even if he was coerced with candy, he stuck to the wall and didn’t seem to be coming forward. Sejin pointed his finger at the cupboard.

“Oh? A rat! That’s a rat’s tail in the pot, isn’t it?”

As his brother’s nerves focused on the cupboard, Sejin did not miss the chance and splashed the water. The older brother started crying, and Sejin laughed.

Apparently, his father would have flirted with the ladies in the neighbourhood with his dependable and decent appearance when he was young — One of them was his mother — The older brother resembled his father in appearance, but his mental illness had tarnished his good looks. A man with a mind that fell behind his body was not welcomed anywhere. Even on behalf of his older brother, Sejin matured beyond his age.

Suddenly, Sejin frowned. He was wiping his brother’s lower body with a towel, which was frozen in cold water, but suddenly his brother’s thing increased in volume. At that moment, he quickly pulled up the pants and underwear that were on his brother’s ankles. A large hand gripped Sejin’s head and rubbed something wet against his cheeks and lips. It was his brother’s penis. The older brother gasped and tried to push his penis into his younger brother’s mouth. This was why he had to be careful every time. Sejin’s fists slammed into his brother’s pelvis and his abdomen.

“Ah! Urgh! Let go! Crazy bastard!”

“Heuk! Heuk… !!”

Sejin bit his mouth hard to keep the genitals from entering. He struggled with his head held hostage, but he was helpless in the face of brutal power. The breath on his head grew more ravenous, his genitals wriggling towards his aim. Sejin groped the floor, grabbed the washbasin, and swung it around without looking. With the loud hitting sound, his brother’s lower body fell. He held his shoulder and looked like he was crying.

“Ouch… It hurts…”

He murmured, not suiting his beastly behaviour. Sejin wiped his face, which was dirty with mucus, and threw a fierce glare at him.

“If you do this one more time, I know how to tell the police to cut off the wiener!”

The older brother, with tears in his eyes, pleaded that he was wrong. His penis still soared towards unresolved desires. He had never been in a relationship before, and never will be. The penis was a useless ornament to him. Suddenly, a cruel thought flashed through his head. Sejin poured a gourd of water onto his lower body.

The brother washed his face and then they ate ramen together. They were given a subsidy from the state, but it was difficult to make do with, and the rice distributed by the church ran out, and he had to make meals with ramen noodles until next week. Sejin watched his brother slurping his noodles. The fact that someone needed him was a crushing burden on his shoulders, but it was also a reason he had to be strong.

Since he was the only one who could enter that closed world, he felt a sense of superiority, even though he felt sorry for his older brother. His brother, who had already emptied the bowl of ramen, was scratching the empty bowl. Sometimes when he sees his brother, he wants to kick him out bare, but he also wants to stroke his head. Sejin bit the chopsticks.

“Who do you like the most in the world?”

“Sejin. I like my brother the most.”

“Only during times like this?”

“I like Sejin the most.”

His older brother shook his head. It was a simple pleasure to force this choice. Sejin pretends not to win, and he pours his share of ramen into his brother’s bowl. “Thank you.”, said his brother who bowed his head. He wiped the sweat from his brother’s forehead with the back of his hand, and before he opened his eyes again, Sejin ate the leftover ramen quickly. After a couple of chopsticks, the bowl quickly became empty, and the hungry stomach was rejuvenated.

“You bastard! How dare you talk to your mother like this?!”

“Are you crazy, Mom? Didn’t I tell you to get rid of them all?! Are you trying to make me go crazy?!”

“Ahh…! This bastard! What are you doing?! Chaewoo, what are you doing?! Calm down a little, brother!”

The sound of glass breaking and the sound of slapping could be heard across the wall. It was probably Chaewoo and his people again. Hearing the sound of Chaewoo’s older brother making a fuss, Sejin went to a corner and put up his ears. He was a neighbour who lived across the street from a few houses, and the only family members were his mom and his high school brother. They created an unapproachable air, so they didn’t hang out with anyone in the neighbourhood. The strange thing was that people came and went in and out of such an isolated house every day. The visitors looked sick, but when they came out of Chaewoo’s house, they became rejuvenated. On the other hand, Chaewoo and his brother seemed increasingly unhappy.

It wasn’t long before Sejin found out the incredible secret.