774 The Real Me

Although Iris' current physical condition looked worrisome, her shocking words completely stunned Jin Liwei until he stood there like a frozen statue with eyes and mouth wide open. He was unable to insist on taking her to the hospital.

She was still trembling a little but looked more steady now compared to when she couldn't stop crying earlier. It seemed that she had hit her stride once she started talking.

"Long Xiulan died during that car crash, the teenage pop singer Long Xiulan who used to chase Brother Chonglin around back then. The Long Xiulan you looked down on before meeting her in person and helped conceal the truth of her deadly car accident in order to protect your younger brother and his then fiancée, Fan Luo."

The frozen Jin Liwei finally showed some movements. He twitched at the mention of his past sin. Then he frowned and became pensive as her words registered in his mind.

She cleared her throat and licked her lips because her mouth was feeling dry. Despite this, she didn't dare take a water break. The need to tell him the truth felt more urgent—not the whole truth but the part about her at least. He deserved to know that much.

"It was only her body that was kept alive when she was in coma. Only her memories remained but the actual Long Xiulan was already gone. When she woke up—no, when I woke up, I became Long Xiulan."

She pressed a hand on her chest and looked at him with as much steadiness as she could muster at the moment. "Long Xiulan and I were two completely different people. Then we…we both died. For some reason, I was able to live again after my death but I'm not myself anymore. I became another person who already lived her own life before I…before I…" A furrow formed between her brows as she struggled to find a suitable word. "Before I replaced her."

Silence.

Jin Liwei looked at her up and down with a deep gaze that made her feel like it was piercing straight to her soul. Her heart was hammering inside her chest that it was difficult for her to match it with her breathing. She recognized it as an onset of a panic attack but strangely enough, her mind was feeling clearer by the second after she started talking even as her body was trying to collapse. It was such an odd sensation but she would take it any time over the crying mess that she had been earlier.

"So you're telling me…" Jin Liwei finally spoke again. His tone was careful and measured. "You're telling me that you're not the real Long Xiulan. That you were a completely different person before you woke up as her."

She nodded.

"You're Evelinka…Evelina?"

She couldn't help but smile when he called her name. Her real name. It was a small, bittersweet smile. "Yes. I am Evelina."

"The person I met in the hotel lobby back then…"

"It was me."

"The person who measured my penis…"

Her mouth twitched before she pointed a finger at herself.

"The person I fell in love with…"

She looked at him straight in the eyes and whispered, "It's me."

"Then my wife is…"

She stood up on shaky legs and placed both of her hands on her chest. "Your wife is me, Liwei. It has always been me."

His expression finally softened.

Seeing his expression, her smile widened, brightening her entire face, even though there were still traces of wariness and sadness in her expression. She wanted to walk over to him and hug him and kiss him but didn't—not yet—because she still wasn't sure if he believed her or not.

He sat on the edge of the bed and tapped his fingers on the mattress as he continued looking at her. "What you told me…that Xiulan and Evelina are completely different people…all of this…" He blew out a long breath. "This is a little hard for me to believe."

Her smile dimmed.

'So he doesn't believe me.'

She dropped her gaze to the floor as she felt another twinge in her heart, a little more painful this time, while her eyes burned and watered once again. 

'Of course, he doesn't. What I told him sounds impossible even to my own ears.'

Her dim smile turned wry. She wanted to laugh at herself.

"But," he said.

She returned her eyes on him and waited for what he was about to say next. 

"I do believe that the person I love is you, the one standing in front of me right now."

A hopeful spark brightened her dim smile.

"I still need to think about what you said about the real Xiulan dying and you replacing her after your own death," he continued. "This is all too much for my exhausted brain to process today. Everything just sounds so unbelievable that I'm not even sure anymore if I'm still awake right now or maybe I'm already sleeping and this is all just a dream."

"You're not dreaming, Liwei. This is very real."

He ran his hand through his hair, messing it up. "Part of me can't believe it because it sounds so unreal but the more I think about it, the more things begin to make sense. Although I have never met you in person before—I mean, I have never met Long Xiulan in person before, her personality and reputation were widely known by the public. She didn't really leave a good impression on people. 

"But then after waking up from that one-year coma, Iris Long suddenly changed a lot. Not only did her musical style took a drastic change but so did her entire personality. People said that it's merely a strategic image change to revive and prolong her showbiz career but I personally know that this is her—no, this is your real personality."

"Yes," she whispered. "This is the real me."