778 Grief

"Everything is just…too much," Jin Liwei said as his entire body became more taut. He resembled an agitated beast while continuing to stalk inside their bedroom.

Iris could only watch him, knowing that he was grieving for the loss of his sworn brother, the real Lu Zihao, who died in a ski accident far away in a foreign country.

He stopped all of a sudden and faced her. "The one inside my fifth brother…he's really your brother?"

She nodded.

"Are you glad that your brother is alive inside my fifth brother?"

Her eyes filled with tears but she couldn't lie to him about this, so she nodded.

The trembling of his body intensified and his jaw hardened. Contrary to her expectations, however, he also nodded and said in a harsh voice, "Good!"

"G-good?" she asked in confusion.

"Your brother…he has Fifth Brother's memories? Just like how you also have Long Xiulan's memories?"

She nodded.

"That's good," he repeated. "Fifth Brother might be...d-dead but at least his memories are still alive even if another person now owns them including his body."

"Oh, Liwei."

"And he's your brother. I should be thankful that it's not a random stranger. If he's your brother, I'm sure that he's a good person just like you. I can trust him with my fifth brother's body and memories."

Guilt filled her after hearing him say that her brother was a good person. Well, her brother was indeed a good person to her but not necessarily to other people. The truth was that Nikolai Vetrov was regarded by many as the devil incarnate himself, a terror to humanity. She didn't know how to tell Jin Liwei that such a terrifying man now owned his sworn brother's body.

"I know all this now…but fuck." Jin Liwei dropped to a sitting position on the chaise longue. His whole body was bent forward in a defeated pose. He rubbed his face hard before finally covering his eyes with his hands.

The sight caused a great, twisting pain in Iris' heart. She climbed off the bed and hurried towards him, not caring about the medicinal smell on his body. She stood in front of him and pulled him in an embrace. 

His arms immediately wrapped around her waist, hugging her so hard that it was almost painful. However, she didn't complain but took it instead. Her man was hurting. If she could share his pain even for just a little, then she would gladly offer herself. He pressed his face against her stomach and not long after, she felt warm dampness soaking the front of her nightdress.

She didn't notice that she had began singing a soothing Italian song. Her voice was a little husky due to it being dry from all the crying and emotional conversation they had. Despite this, her tone still sounded crystal clear and the melody flowed throughout the entire room like a calming river. It didn't only soothe him but herself as well until the medicinal scent wafting from him didn't bother her anymore.

After some time, Jin Liwei rubbed his face on her nightdress before withdrawing. His eyes were red and swollen and the front of her nightdress was damp but she didn't comment anything about it. 

"Feel better?" she whispered while continuing to caress his hair.

"En."

She leaned down and gave his lips a soft, gentle kiss.

"Let's sleep now, okay?"

"En."

She pulled him up by the hand. He followed her like a big child and allowed her to tuck him stomach down on the bed. She lay down right beside him. 

Her nose seemed to have gotten immune to the medicinal scent on him. Or perhaps it got too impaired by the foul smell because she also couldn't smell anything anymore. She didn't care about any of this, though. All she cared about at the moment was comforting her grieving man.

She continued singing the Italian aria to him like a lullaby. His arm was wrapped over her, his tight embrace indicating his need for her to stay with him. They looked at each other, both with red, swollen eyes.

Moments later, his eyes began to droop close. She continued singing the same Italian aria over and over, waiting for him to fall asleep. It was usually her who would fall asleep first, but this time, she wanted to let him sleep first.

"That song," he murmured in a sleepy voice.

She stopped singing. "Hm? What about the song, darling?"

"That song, it's beautiful. I like it."

"I'm glad you like it," she said and kissed his shoulder. "Now go to sleep."

"En."

He yawned and closed his eyes. But he still spoke. "Sounds familiar…"

"What sounds familiar?"

"That beautiful song."

She caressed his hair, hoping that her gentle ministrations would ease him into a restful sleep. While doing so, she still satisfied his interest about the song. "It's a classic Italian aria. Not very popular among the general public but most classical musicians should be able to recognize it. Maybe you've heard it from a classic concert or an opera before."

"Hmm…"

"I personally love it," she said.

"Me, too," he murmured. "I love it now because you sang it for me."

"I'll sing it for you whenever you want me to."

"En. Good night, love."

"Good night, darling."

She smiled as she lay there watching him sleep. Gratitude for her man filled her. The beginning of her confession had been painfully rough but everything still ended well for her. Jin Liwei accepted her for who she was and continued to love her despite the absurdity of her rebirth. Now she had to help him through his grief of losing his fifth brother whose body her own brother now occupied.

"Thank you," she whispered to him. "And I love you."

Her eyes also became heavy and soon she joined him to sleep.