When people are alive, there will always be various illusions like [She likes me back!], [I don’t need to study; it’s common sense!], etc.
When Lu Yibei plunged the knife into the tree, his opponent forced him into a dreamscape.
When he woke up, before he had time to see the situation before him, he felt a sense of tightness before realising that he was tied up.
That damned magpie tied him up with the network cable in his house, followed by a layer of scotch tape.
It’s a miracle he was still alive after offending a fallen god.
He cursed himself for being so reckless when dealing with a god.
He found himself in the living room downstairs now. The magpie must have taken him downstairs when he fainted.
The whole living room looked as if a storm had just gone through it: broken glass, scratched wallpaper, decorations and paintings scattered across the ground, a TV with a big hole in it…
Whatever he looked at, he frowned.
But what about the magpie?
Just as he was thinking, a girl’s voice sounded in his ears.
“Are you awake?”
A face wearing a hideous mask appeared from behind him and congratulated him: “The operation is a success; you’re a full-fledged woman now!”
His heart skipped a beat as he checked his body from the corner of his eye. Shifting his thighs a little, he breathed out a sigh of relief.
Besides, even without surgery, it wasn’t that big anyways.
“Thank you,” Yibei thanked.
“I know how to take care of my patients, so don’t worry,” the girl said, and at the same time, she put pieces of his charm into her mouth through the gaps of the mask, as if she were eating cookies.
Seeing this, he felt his heart like a needle, “Those…”
“Wait, who the hell are you?” he asked. “What are you doing in my house? How did you get inside?”
“You have a lot of energy for somebody who just stabbed a god.”
He was stunned for a moment, and his neck turned stiffly to look at the girl as his pupils seemed strange. “No… you…”
Seeing this, the girl smiled as she patted the still-bleeding wound on her shoulder and said, “That’s right. It is me.”
She ate another piece of the charm and swallowed slowly. Immediately, there was a green gleam on her shoulder, and her wound healed little by little.
“Not bad. You’re good at making these.”
As a chef, he would be quite happy to hear somebody praise his cooking, but…
‘Those are my spells! Don’t talk about it like a delicious snack, okay?’
The girl suddenly let out a muffled groan; her eyebrows were furrowed together as if she were experiencing great pain.
A faint smell of blood permeated his nostrils, and he was stunned for a moment, seeing golden blood ooze out of the girl’s shoulder.
“Damn it,” the girl breathed out sharply. “What kind of knife is that knife of yours? You’d best tell me the truth, or…”
A surge of condensed psychic energy locked onto him between the areas of his thighs.
His face paled slightly, and he hurriedly explained, “N-no! I’m the worst at lying. My father hates liars; I will never lie.”
The girl in front of him must be Jumang, if not a direct reincarnation or derivative of Jumang.
And he could sense she was powerful. If she wanted to, he would die in a single thought.
“I’ll tell you everything!” Yibei pleaded. “I’ll make sacrifices and burn candles for you every spring! I’ll even burn money for you!”
“Stop it,” the girl interrupted. “Were you always this talkative? What’s the use of burning money anyway? All it does is cause air pollution.”
At least modern urban legends are environmentally friendly.
“What if I plant a tree every year in your name?”
“Yes! That would be great,” the girl agreed but realised that the topic of the conversation had strayed too far. Her eyes drifted to the kitchen knife on the coffee table, and she saw the cold light that beamed off of it that made her wound emit a dull pain.
“Answer the question! What kind of knife is that?”
She pretended to be strong and growled at Yibei, but she couldn’t hide the vain air in her words.
“Okay… But could you please untie me first?”
“No!”
“O-okay, my knife, it isn’t much, but my father-“
The girl interjected immediately, “The Ancestral Dragon Blade.”
“Uh, no.”
“Ancestor’s Eternal Edict?”
“What are you talking about?”
“Zul’Gurub’s Omen?”
‘Isn’t that from a game? How does that exist in real life?’
“Actually, it’s my family’s ancestral kitchen knife.”
The girl’s eyes twitched, and her complexion became eerie. “You don’t want to cooperate with me at all, do you? It seems like I have to give you a little pain before you tell me the truth.”
To be honest, the thought of a great god like her being stabbed by a kitchen knife was ridiculous.
Thinking about this, she stretched out a finger, imbuing it with a blue light, and pointed it at Yibei, saying, “I see you were writing an article about Jumang just now.”
“Yes! Jumang, I worship thee! Amen!”
“Stop that,” the girl continued. “Do you know what else Jumang rules over?”
He shook his head.
“He’s in charge of vitality, which means reproduction. You see this little light on my hand, and do you see where it’s pointing?”
She pointed towards his crotch area, and the light grew brighter.
“So… You want to fuck me?” Yibei blurted it out.
The girl’s complexion became darker, and she moved her fingers closer to his lower regions.
“W-wait!” he shouted in a panic. “O’ Great God, please spare me! I’m telling the truth.”
He suddenly felt very wrong. All he knew was that his kitchen knife was very powerful.
He suddenly felt that he had a little understanding of the girl’s feelings; being such a powerful entity, you must be subdued by an equally powerful, grand weapon.
Being subdued by a kitchen knife, of all things, he figured he had to come up with a different name for the knife.
Because her fingers were getting closer and closer to his lower regions.
For a while, he tried his best to search for an impressive artefact in his memory but couldn’t find anything suitable to name his kitchen knife.
Knock! Knock!
Just as he was racking his brains to think, there was a knock on the door.
The girl visibly jumped, and her finger accidentally touched his crotch without realising it.
And despair washed over him.
“This is literally just light on my fingers to scare you. It’s useless.”
“Oh.”
Knock! Knock!
The gentle knocks turned violent, and seeing this, the girl gave Yibei a look, and he shouted at the door, “Who is it?”
“Open the door! It’s… your neighbours!”
Beyond the voice, a muffled voice could be heard saying, “Get out of the way! We’re breaking in!”
