"...Ahem. Well, I suppose it's better than doing it in young lady’s house. It can't be helped."
I coughed falsely and defended myself. Physiological phenomena are inevitable, and so are men's. So, I let it go.
"...You're surprisingly calm about it."
"I'm not as naive as young lady, okay? I don't expect storks to bring babies."
I had even witnessed some younger children playing in the bushes one day. When a few of them noticed me, they whispered my name frantically while 'doing' so, and I blushed but left the scene pretending not to know anything. It was too pitiful to call out to them at that moment. If they're doing it in hiding without hurting anyone, it's best to forget about it.
"...by the way, what are you doing here?"
The man in front of me asks, rolled down his sleeves and put on gloves, probably working on a job. For a moment, I catch a glimpse of his arm, which was covered in painful-looking scars. The indescribable feeling I had felt earlier dissipates, and I gasp. However, I immediately open my mouth to explain without letting him know how upset I am.
"I, well...just taking a break, I suppose."
I said, showing him the basket in my hands to provide some context.
"There are leeks, chrysanthemum leaves, and... Green? Also, light pickled dish and morning rice porridge?"
"Yes. I heard that tomorrow and the day after tomorrow, you and the people of the Trading Company will be busy with packing. So I thought it would be better to have something salty and easy to digest for breakfast."
"That's very kind of you."
The servant nods and says he will thank the kitchen later for their thoughtfulness, but then falls silent.
I try to maintain a calm facade, but internally I panic over what I had just said. It was too confrontational..I was not sure what to say, and when I noticed his eyes on me, I instinctively blurt out.
"But anyway, what are you doing here at such a time and such a place? is it really so leisurely to be a Yun-shoku?"
I frown as I realize that this is a bit too aggressive after I had said it so quickly. However, it was too late to take them back. I fearfully wait for the other person's response, but..
"Hahaha, well, I am also treating my foot injury. Lord Uemon has given me some time off, so I have some free time on my hands."
"I-I see..."
Despite my concerns, the servant spoke with a wry smile, treating it as a joke. But I could not laugh at his words. There was no way I could. Instead, I glanced at his body.
That beast of a wild boar was covered in needles all over its body. It was probably because of those needles that his body was pierced all over. Then, on closer inspection, I could see that he had bandages wrapped around his entire body, even on top of his clothes.
"......"
And naturally, my gaze was drawn to his right foot. Unlike his body, I could see the bandage marks on his right leg at a glance. He was standing, but his swollen calf, bandaged with several layers of bandages, looked very painful with faint blood stains on the pure white cloth. It made me feel even more guilty, adding to the already somber atmosphere.
"Speaking of which, how is young lady? Did she get injured as well?"
Asked the servant, noticing my gaze fixed on his leg. He must have noticed my gaze. Because of that, he sat down, trying to hide his injured foot from me, and looked out over the rural landscape.
His question sounded like a distraction, a helping hand, and a curiosity. Perhaps all were right. But I appreciated it, too. So I played along.
"No, she's not hurt. But she's very depressed. I'm trying to comfort her, but... it's hard when someone she knows is being executed, even if it's a great criminal."
Young lady had been trying to get the sentence reduced, or at least avoid death penalty, but her efforts had been in vain. However,dDespite her noble status as the daughter of an influential person in her hometown, she does not have the power to overturn the decision that the Lord has made.
Young lady herself must also understand this...and yet, even knowing that, she cannot abandon that half-youkai.
(It's very much like her...)
Even when confronted with the charges clearly, she still wanted to believe in Iruka. At least to have a conversation... Unfortunately, that hope is slim.
That too is only natural, as those around her interpreted him as the cunning half-youkai manipulating and deceiving the sheltered young lady with his silver tongue, using her for his own purposes... or at least that is how the story was being spun.
Well, it's the best way to protect the position of the village's princess, too. No one else would be hurt, and there would only be one sacrifice. It's like putting a lid on something smelly...
"I understand how she feels. It's tough for anyone to see someone they know being harmed. Well, young lady is kind too——Hey, what's that look in your eyes?"
I couldn't help but look at the servant beside me as if I were looking at a rare animal. The man in front of me pointed out in a tone of annoyance, so I coughed as if to cover it up in a hurry.
"No, I was surprised by your reply. I didn't anticipate a sympathetic remark from Onitsuki's servant."
"What a disrespectful... Is there any reason for that?"
When I explained myself, the servant seemed dissatisfied for a moment, but immediately lowered his shoulders as if he was satisfied with my explanation. Then he sighed in exasperation, seeming quite unwilling.
(...Surprisingly, he's quite emotional)
Despite the rumors about the servant's demeanor and the mask he wears that seems to kill his personality, he seemed quite lively to me.
"...I would appreciate it if you could keep this conversation to yourself. I don't want unnecessary suspicions from my employers."
I instinctively understood that the man was probably making a grimace behind his mask. I hesitated for a moment, but ultimately agreed to his request.
"That's fine, but it's just idle curiosity. It's not like I'll gain anything from sympathizing with you."
"I have nothing to hide. I'll be leaving in a day or two anyway."
His reply was cold and unfriendly, which made me slightly dissatisfied. But I suppressed my emotions, as his response was reasonable, and it would be pointless to feel dissatisfied.
(Come to think of it, why did I feel upset earlier?)
I was confused and bewildered, but I noticed the servant's gaze and quickly composed myself. It was clear that he was seeking a response from me, and I didn't want to show any signs of panic. I was surprisingly competitive.
His words were spun a little too quickly, and they sounded like an excuse. But he was not lying. Young lady is lacking in caution. I, who was standing by her side, couldn't help but feel defensive.
"I understand. A master-servant relationship is difficult. I understand your difficulty."
"I appreciate your understanding."
What came back was a somewhat friendly and wry smile. It seemed oddly familiar, but at the same time, I couldn't help but feel a sense of closeness to the content of the message. As a result, I found myself thanking them naturally and courteously, but also feeling a strange sense of defeat.
Feeling strangely frustrated, I asked him in the next moment.
"Excuse me, may I sit next to you?"
"I don't mind...."
As soon as he said this, I was sitting down next to him. Instead of looking at the countryside, I turned my gaze towards the servant. Although I was a little puzzled by the much closer Hannya-mask than before, I spun the words.
"Um...thank you for the other day."
"Yes?"
The servant was slightly taken aback and seemed confused. But his reaction only made me feel more pleased with myself. I felt like I had won. I couldn't help but let out a small, self-satisfied laugh.
After a moment of silence, the servant looked at me intently, as if trying to figure something out. Finally, he spoke.
"When you say 'the other day,' are you referring to what happened at the shrine? If that was the case, you should not be thanking me. Guarding is my job."
"No, young lady and I are alive because of you, no doubt. And... I couldn't move at that time."
That's right, I couldn't move back then. I should have moved, but I didn't. I was paralyzed by fear, frozen in place, unable to make sense of what was happening.
"It reminded me of my... father."
"Father? Your father?"
"Yes."
I replied, surprised that I was even talking about my family.
"A long time ago, my father had a serious leg injury. A youkai bit off part of his leg, and it was a terrible injury. I remember it was a big deal. It was really scary."
It had been a harsh winter, with a poor harvest due to a cold summer. And much of what we had grown was lost to the landowner's demands for rent. So my father worked desperately through the winter. And then he was attacked by... youkai.
"Hehehe, that's a pathetic story. When I saw your injured leg, I couldn't help but think of that."
"And that's why you couldn't move."
"Yes."
It's really pathetic. I was supposed to protect young lady and help her escape...
"Anyway, I'm really grateful for what you did. There are still many things I think about you, but... I appreciate it. Thank you very much."
There are still many suspicious things about him. So, I don't fully trust him. He is also a servant of the Onitsuki family that captured Iruka. It's hard to come to terms with that.
But that being said, I expressed my sincere gratitude. At any rate, In any case, it's basic manners to thank someone for their kindness. That's what my brother, who is no longer with us, used to say.
At that time, it was a fact that he had risked his life to protect us from the attacking demon boar, and when I saw his back, I certainly felt relieved.
"...It would be rude to refuse here. So, I appreciate your kind words. By the way, your father was injured? I'm sorry to hear that."
"He was the main pillar of the family. My brothers and I were small at the time, of course, and my mother worked at home, but it wasn't enough."
We struggled every day, making grass shoes, hats, baskets, anything we could sell to earn some money. But it was never enough. Every day was hard. The cold was hard.
"...I see. I understand your hardship. I'm sorry you had to go through that."
The man in front of me seemed to sympathize with my self-important story, but his tone was sincerely sympathetic. Perhaps this man was in a similar situation. After all, it is not unusual for peasants in pioneer villages and inhabitants of the northern lands to be in poverty in winter. And I couldn't imagine an Onitsuki buying anyone from outside their own region.
This made me feel even closer to this servant, whom I had previously seen only as an enemy. It was selfish of me, I thought, but I couldn't help it.
"No, my family is still fortunate. Fortunately, we don't have any trouble feeding our family now."
"Oh...is your family well?"
"Yes? Why do you ask."
"N-nothing... But with all due respect, I was just surprised."
This response made me a little uncomfortable, but at the same time, I thought it was natural to think about it from a common sense point of view. Since the main pillar of my family was no longer able to work, it would not be surprising if my family had been scattered or wiped out. Perhaps his family was...I couldn't condemn him for thinking that way.
So I spoke up about it.
"I might be despised for saying this, but... We sold our family."
And then I explained about my older brother, whom I could barely remember, and what happened after he was sold.
