As soon as I stepped outside, I could smell the ocean. As I got closer to the cliff, I could see the horizon where the sky and sea meet in the distance. It’s always a beautiful sight, but I don’t have the energy to take it all in.
“Ah, I think I’m finally home.”
I pretend to look at Raphael, who stretches coolly, and quietly survey the situation.
The distance from the cliff is just right. Raphael right next to him, Simeon a few steps behind. The bodyguard is even further away. Even if he ran, it would take him seconds to reach me. Now if I can just get Rafael’s attention to look elsewhere…….
“Ah, yes. The Guildmaster.”
Raphael said, looking back at Simeon just in time.
“Speaking of him, why don’t you just ask him to come in as an apostle?”
“…Apostle?”
“Yes, but I’ll have to ask my hyung’s doctor first.”
You can do it now. No, only now.
So let’s end it. Here.
Slowly, I walked past him, casually unsheathing the sword at my waist. Then I walked towards the cliff with my arms crossed so that he couldn’t see the sword behind my back. As he reached the blackness below, he heard Raphael’s voice.
“How’s Hajae?”
I slowly turned around and saw three faces side by side. Each with a different expression. Raphael was still clueless, and the bodyguard was indifferent. Only Simeon’s expression hardened as he noticed something strange. Simeon’s eyes widened at the sight of the knife in my hand.
As he approached, I immediately raised the knife to my throat.
“Don’t move.”
Raphael’s face turned pale as he found the knife.
I felt the blade against my flesh. Apparently, Raphael hadn’t been exaggerating when he said it could pierce the skin of any monster. It was so sharp, it felt as if it had already cut me. I furrowed my brow at the stabbing pain, and a startled Raphael rushed over.
“…Hyung?”
“If you take even one step away from there, I’m going to slice my carotid artery.”
I raised the blade straight up, and Raphael stopped dead in his tracks. The amount of blood trickling from my neck was considerable, and he couldn’t hide his anxiety. I heard Simeon’s voice, barely able to contain his emotions.
“Now… What are you doing?”
Simeon’s dark eyes glowed with anger, his former ease completely gone. And yet, instead of being scared, I was strangely relieved. I had taught him once that the one who loses his cool in a game always loses.
“I don’t want to play into your hands anymore, so promise me.
You’ll never appear in front of me again…. and nothing will happen to me.”
Simeon swallowed dryly and slowly reached for me.
“Put that down, it’s dangerous.”
“I’m not going to die anyway, so what’s the big deal.”
“Shin Ha-jae!”
“If you want to stop me, you can promise me.”
His slightly parted lips twitched. Who would have thought that a man who was so good at lying without changing his expression would be so flustered. I was his only achilles’ heel in a seemingly perfect world.
“…Hyung.”
As I turn my head towards the trembling voice, I see Raphael, his eyes blue, and I can only feel sorry for him. I didn’t want to show him this ridiculous hostage situation….
“I’m sorry, Raphael.”
“No, it’s okay, I mean…….”
“But I really need to end this relationship here.”
I turned my gaze back to Simeon. I frowned at him, as if to say something, and he took a cautious step forward.
“Shin Hajae-ssi, for now, let’s talk….”
I took a step back, too. I felt the end of the ground with my heels. Simeon stopped, as if in hindsight, but I had no intention of stopping.
“I told you, if you come any closer, I’ll stab myself.”
With those words, I plunged the knife into my throat without mercy, and as if that weren’t enough, I sliced horizontally, causing blood to gush out like a fountain. I watched Raphael scream and cover his mouth, and Simeon rush towards me, slow as a film.
Finally, just as his fingertips were about to touch me, I threw myself off the cliff. His hands flailed futilely in the air, and I could see his face contorted in despair. Then the sensation of falling through the wind brought back a nostalgic memory.
Pung.
Only deafening white noise filled the air. Slowly opening my eyes, I see sunlight smeared white on the surface of the water. Beneath it, the bubbles that flow from my nose and mouth, and further down, the red blood slowly spreads. The bizarre sight was like a red flower blooming in a blue sea.
The cold sea takes away my body heat. My whole body slowly stiffens, and I can’t feel the pain in my neck. I don’t have to struggle to stay afloat, the sea takes me deeper by itself. The sunlight gradually disappears, and the sounds outside gradually fade away.
Only then is there complete silence. I sink into a soothing silence, disconnected from the outside world.
I sink into it for a few seconds. Maybe minutes.
I open my eyes to a flash of light and see a bright blue sky. I’m still hoping it’s the ocean, but the sky is indifferent. I glance sideways and see Simeon, drenched in water. His face was even paler than the blue of the sea. He was talking loudly, but the tinnitus makes it hard to hear him.
Beside him, Raphael sighed, holding a splintered gemstone. It’s probably thanks to him that I don’t feel any pain in my neck. I am indebted to him again; what I have done to make myself lighter, I have done to make myself heavier.
The next thing I know, my hearing is back, and my voice no longer hides his anger.
“What the hell are you doing!”
I knew why Simeon was angry, but I didn’t want to understand.
“Why are you angry?”
“…What?”
“You’re the one who ignored the warning to stay away.”
At my cold reprimand, he fell silent, seemingly at a loss for words. As I struggled to get to my feet, Simeon held out his hand to me out of habit. My mouth watered at the thoughtfulness of his gesture.
I slapped his hand away roughly and sat up on my own, glaring at Simeon.
“I’m not kidding, I’ll keep doing this until you give up on me.”
“Shin Hajae-ssi.”
“It’s no use trying to cure me, I’ll bite your tongue if you take the knife from me, and I’ll break my head if you tie my hands and feet.”
His head was cold, and there was no hesitation in his actions, as if he had dumped all his useless thoughts into the sea.
“So promise me, you’ll let me go.”
Simeon hesitated for a moment, and then, as if deciding something, he opened his mouth to speak, so I stopped him.
“If you’re just going to talk your way out of this, then stop, because I don’t trust you either, and I’ve already done the work for you.”
Knowing how he’s used to getting out of sticky situations, it was a no-brainer.
“I sent an email to the reporter with all the information I had on the apostle.”
“What’s that…….”
“A reservation email, of course.”
Simeon, who had managed to maintain his composure, finally crumbled under my final move.
“When the mail goes out at the time I set, the <Crown of Atonement> will be around my neck in an instant, its thorns digging into my flesh, piercing my muscles.”
His complexion had gone from pale to leaden, now that the mask he had worn to the end was gone.
“It’s no use trying to break it, even the owner of the leash can’t loosen it, so it’ll just keep tightening. At least if I die like a queen, it’ll stop soon enough…. You haven’t forgotten, have you, that I don’t die.”
I was surprised to see his face stiffen in surprise. He didn’t say anything about giving up on me, though. I couldn’t tell if he was panicking or if he was still using his brain to try to win the game with me, so I unwittingly backed him into a corner.
“If you think the email is a lie, let’s wait and see what happens.”
“…”
“Simeon.”
I call out his name, but he doesn’t respond. Finally, I grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and pulled him roughly to his feet, forcing him to look me in the eye.
The reflection of my face in those big black eyes was horrifying. It was white and bloodless, stained with black blood, seawater, and dirty sand. I couldn’t help but grimace at the sight of a living corpse, and then I laughed.
“I’m not making a deal, I’m holding my life hostage.”
But why does he look so upset?
For quite some time now, I’ve liked to see my face in his eyes. I’ve noticed his habit of involuntarily closing his right eye in a wink when he’s joking around, or wrinkling his nose slightly when he’s smiling.
Every moment I was alive in those dark eyes, so I always wanted to be happy and bright, so that one day, when I was gone from this world, I would only be remembered for my smiling face.
But all his hopes were dashed.
In the end, the last thing that will remain in his mind will be his woeful face.
