CH 250

As I neared the city, I saw that a crowd had gathered in front of the main gate.

They were all looking towards the plain, spreading all kinds of baseless rumors as they pleased.

Even though I had just come from there, no one paid any attention to me.

A group of soldiers passed by me.

I saw a beastkin and an elf among them.

The people were pushing and shoving each other, and I almost fell down when I bumped into one of them. Having the feeling that if I fell now, I would never get up again, I desperately tried to stay on my feet.

I walked on.

I moved forward.

A bunch of people passed by me.

A red-haired swordsman among them passed by me.

A one-eyed adventurer passed by me.

A beautiful elf passed by me.

I had the feeling I knew them. The sense of déjà vu lasted but a moment, and their backs were no longer familiar to me.

I knew this city, this country. Despite my foggy memory, I was certain of that. By the time a few moments had passed, I became uncertain and uneasy.

I walked through the familiar city that I didn’t know.

Pain wracked my left shoulder.

When I touched it, I realized that there were crystals sticking out of it for some reason. When I tried to pull one out, intense pain shot through me. Maybe it was because I was unable to use one of my arms, but I had difficulty maintaining my balance when walking.

Due to my carelessness, I hurt my left leg. Dragging one leg behind me, I moved forward, even if it was slowly, even if only by a little.

There's a place I must go.

It’s under a small bridge.

The place where I met her for the second time.

This is the one thing that I must never forget. Over and over, again and again, I engraved it in my head.

Many different kinds of people passed by me in the city as I walked on slowly.

I passed by a store I knew.

The storekeeper, whom I didn't know, gave me a dirty look.

I walked down a street I didn't know.

I didn't know the street, but some part of me still remembered the way.

As if drawn to it, I entered a dimly-lit alleyway.

Almost falling, I leaned my body against a nearby wall and continued on, my footsteps scraping against the cobbles.

I moved forward.

I walked down an alleyway I felt I knew………………no, I walked through a city I didn't know at all.

In the alleyway, I saw a group of children playing.

Seeing me, they screamed and scattered.

I moved forward through the now-deserted back alleys.

In the glass window of an abandoned building, I caught my reflection.

With how terrible I looked, it was no wonder the children ran away.

Tattered clothes, white hair, eerie golden eyes, a horn on my face, wounds and blood all over. I looked worse than a dying vagrant.

「Urgh」

I choked and threw up. What had come up from my throat were clots of blood and bodily fluids. My consciousness flickered.

I pounded the stone wall to keep myself conscious.

I couldn't move my legs.

Resting my weight on the wall, I waited for my legs to recover. From the alleyway, I could see a sliver of a brightly-lit street. It looked like a distant world. A petite, black-haired young girl walked by. I could see her chatting happily with her companions.

They must be a party of greenhorn adventurers.

For some reason. the sight of the girl gave me a sense of both relief and sorrow. However, I felt a small surge of energy.

I headed into the darkness. My destination wasn't in the direction of the lights.

Like they were someone else's dreams, my memories spilled out of me.

The bonds with various people and visions of them. Like a kaleidoscope, even if I tried to look back, the view would never be the same again.

It was almost like the phantasmagoria that preceded death.

They disappeared the moment they came to mind.

They disappeared one after another, and in the end, nothing was left.

All that was left was an empty darkness. A vacant void. A lonely theater where the curtains had fallen and the audience were long gone.

I gave way.

Something deep inside told me, “Get up,” but I had no reason to.

But however, not having a reason was no reason to not move forward. That was what the small fragment of the ego I had left told me. It felt right to me.

Crawling, I moved forward.

Thinking, "If I can't move my legs, I'll use my arms," I dragged myself forward with my right arm, the only arm that still worked decently.

Through the dark alleyway……

Like a beast……

Like an insect……

Oww.

It hurts.

I'm sleepy.

I might as well just forget everything. If I just let go……

「urk」

I bit my tongue.

By inflicting pain, I told myself that I absolutely couldn't do that.

Crawl. Move forward, even if it's by one meter or one centimeter.

I have to go there.

I have to go――――――――Huh, where is it that I have to go?

In the few moments I was at a standstill, my broken glasses slid off and dropped to the ground.

Carved into the lenses of the glasses were the words "Head for the bridge. Meet her." Along with a bout of nausea and a jolt to my brain, I regained a memory and bond that were as fragile as a bubble.

A small fire was lit.

It was far too small, not enough to make my body work sufficiently, but even so, it was like a sun within the lightless darkness.

I can move forward. I know where it is I must go.

Just a little bit further.

I'm almost there.

I don't care how pathetic I look. She won't care about such things.

The final visions passed by me.

I saw a dream of an arrow shot from pitch-black darkness.

Risking our lives on the maniacal floor and affirming our bond.

Being whisked away alone to the land of the Myriad Kings, and then being reunited.

A dream of honey and sweetness.

Challenging the dragon, and the end of the festival.

To the forgotten capital.

To a world trapped in delusion.

No matter where I was, I returned to her side.

A tranquil interlude.

A respite from adventuring.

The gods' respite.

Encountering a threat to the world in the City of Ghosts. The vow to go on fighting nevertheless with my party members.

A gathering of wolves and dogs.

Those who achieved success and refused to step aside.

Someone naming me the King of Beasts.

True to that name, I made a gamble between sword and wheat, and buried a hero.

Seeing the forgotten's story.

The young girl who was driven out of her country.

The queen in the innermost depths of a country plagued with curses.

Reuniting with the most evil great magician in the world.

A promise to a friend.

Meeting the man she loved.

But what awaited at the end of her choices and adventures was a sordid end.

The enemy's arrival.

The enemy that came before me.

The enemy known as a hero came.

I couldn't stand him. My reason for fighting was, ultimately, that shallow.

I fought battle upon battle alongside a true hero. I trapped that guy in the fringes of the delusion, and she disappeared into it too.

Ahh, in the end,

These memories too had spilled out.

They had become meaningless splashes on the ground the moment they came to mind. Never again will I be able to remember them. Never again can I look back at them.

The right arm pulling me forward stopped.

I can no longer remember why I have to move it.

But………………I tried to move forward.

I can't remember the reason for moving forward.

My instincts telling me, "Even so……," I reached my hand out just a little.

That too ended shortly after.

Everything was gone, leaving just one empty man. I had the feeling that I had lost something tremendous, but I had also forgotten the sadness and despair of it all at the same time.

A man with nothing.

A faceless man who is no one.

My dying body has already stopped trying to stay alive. My blood has drained away, my flesh has turned cold, stiff, and unmoving. Like a lover, death is right there beside me.

Dying in a dimly-lit alleyway without anyone noticing. There should be no more emotions(remembrance) within him, but the man smiled.

To face the end with a smile, no matter the circumstances, is a way of defying the irony of fate.

With a faint smile on my face, I closed my eyes.

The light in the sky went far away. Spreading out before me was true darkness.

I relaxed and fell asleep.

It was terribly cold and my wounds hurt, but sleepiness engulfed everything.

I'll sleep like a log. I'll sleep, and everything will be forgotten and gone. And that'll be the end.

But,

A single presence is disturbing my sleep. A short scream.

A woman is there. A woman I don't know.

「I'm sorry for startling you」

I couldn't get a good look at her face through my clouded vision.

「If possible―――――」

I don’t have the words to finish the sentence with. A man with nothing has nothing to say.

「Y, you’re badly injured」

Inexplicably, the woman helped me up and lent me her shoulder to lean on. I wondered what kind of whim had made her dirty her white clothes just to help a man covered in wounds and in worse shape than a tattered rag.

My wounds hurt and my body is no longer working as it should. I may die on my own anyway. The fact that the woman is there beside me and I'm not seeing any dark dreams may very well be the only thing keeping me alive.

A man with no memories, no bonds, not a single thing. However, one thing had remained within him.

A fire that someone had left behind, one that would never go out even in the darkness.

＜End＞

Take a moment to savor the feels.

Then read this. (Skip the first part and start where Souya's POV starts)

Yeah, dammit, author, what a gut punch. The very last memory Souya held on to before everything spilled away was his first words to Rana… What an amazing way to show the depths of Souya’s love for Rana without saying a single thing about love! And how many of you even realized that it was a recreation of their first meeting from that alone?!

Which leads to the words Misuranika gave him in the end. His bonds are forever lost, but he can form the bonds once more. Ohh, that single faint hope burning in the darkness! That’s exactly what the author left us with! Which is the analogy the author used earlier! Why is this author so amazing?!

But man, I was tearing up throughout the entire chapter. The people we all knew he had forgotten passing by him and passing him by… The callbacks to all the arcs were amazing too. The whole slow descent into utter hopelessness and then giving us that final light at the end… The imagery of the woman in white helping him out of the darkness he had been heading into and into the light… Phew, what a ride.

I’ve gone on quite a bit about how I feel, so do let me know what you all think of this story overall and the huge climax we’ve just been through. Also, it'd help greatly if you upvote/rate this highly on novelupdates, write a good review sharing how good this story is, and so on! Thank you for getting this far and see you next volume!

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This is mainly for the readers who unlocked this chapter early.

Thank you so much for your support, it really helps, and I'm glad you're enjoying the story so.

I'm going to take some time, probably 2 days, to properly re-edit the 1st volume as it's about 3 years old and I think it badly needs some re-working, so the next release will prob be about 3-ish days from now. So it'll be a longer wait than usual, but I thank you for your patience! *edit: by the time normal readers see this, volume 1 will have been completely re-worked and tidied up!