After finishing my night shift, I returned to my apartment. Going out in the darkness before the night shift always puts me in a bad mood, but for some reason, I feel good walking through the dawning world after the shift.
“I’m home.”
My room is a six-tatami-mat space, a 20-year-old, one-room reinforced concrete apartment designed for single living. Normally, only well-mannered people like me would reply when they return home, but lately, I’ve been replying before entering my room.
That’s because, of course, there’s someone in the room to whom I’m addressing those words.
Hayashi Megumi.
A classmate of mine from high school, she was a victim of domestic violence by her boyfriend, with whom she moved in after coming to Tokyo. She’s now taking refuge in my room.
“Welcome back. Do you want to eat breakfast?”
“Yeah, thanks.”
It’s been almost two weeks since I started hiding her in this room. Our cohabitation, which began under strange circumstances, has been surprisingly peaceful and uneventful so far.
“By the way, Obon is coming up soon. What are you going to do?”
The breakfast she served me consisted of white rice, scrambled eggs, sausages, and miso soup. It’s a typical family breakfast, but a luxurious one for someone living alone.
As I ate, considering that Obon was approaching, Hayashi asked me about it.
“I’m not going home.”
“Why?”
Apparently, it was quite unexpected that I wouldn’t be going home for Obon, so Hayashi asked me. I wonder how she feels about it. Does she want me to go home? Or does she not want me to? Thinking about it, the answer becomes clear. She probably wants me to go home. It can’t be helped. Even though we’re not dating, I’ve been living with a person of the opposite s*x for two weeks due to certain circumstances. Considering how she ended up here, I can only imagine what she’s feeling.
“I couldn’t get a ticket home.”
Obon is a time when even working people have holidays, and it’s known as the homecoming rush. Public transportation raises fares, targeting the demand, and still, trains are so crowded with people that it’s difficult to get a seat.
I moved to Tokyo half a year ago for college. I didn’t go home for Golden Week either. I was homesick when I first moved into this apartment. But as I enjoyed living alone, my body quickly adapted to the environment without others. And before I knew it, I had missed my chance.
“I’m sorry.”
“Why are you apologizing?”
Hayashi laughed in disbelief.
She must have apologized, thinking that she didn’t want to be with me, but it seems her guess was off.
“Aren’t you going back to your parents’ house? …Never mind, forget I asked.”
She’s currently in the midst of a big fight with her family. Going back home probably isn’t an option for her.
“I see. I’m sorry for intruding on your single life.”
“Don’t worry about it. With you around, I don’t have to cook, so it’s quite convenient for me.”
She’s been taking care of almost all the household chores for me. Cooking, laundry, even keeping track of the household budget. The only thing I’m responsible for is cleaning. I feel bad about it, but I just can’t bring myself to give that up. Absolutely not.
“I’m sorry.”
Hayashi apologized again.
“Like I said, don’t worry about it.”
“It’s not that.”
So then, what is it?
“You considered my feelings, right? About not going home.”
I remained silent.
“You thought about my situation, with everything that just happened, and decided not to go home and instead stay with me to cheer me up.”
“Do you think I’m that considerate?”
“You were talking to your parents on the phone the other day.”
The other morning, my parents called my smartphone. The gist of the conversation was whether or not I’d be going home for Obon. I immediately told them I wouldn’t be coming back for Obon either. Surprisingly, my parents gently requested that I return home. Perhaps they wanted their foolish son to help out with cleaning for the first time in a while.
Still, I refused. Honestly, it’s not like there are no trains to go home, no matter how crowded they may be. If anything, college students have long summer vacations, so it would be easy to return home if I shifted the timing.
But still, I…
“That’s the kind of thing you’re not supposed to say out loud. It’s called manners.”
My face feels hot. This girl doesn’t let her guard down or give me any breaks. From now on, I need to be extra careful even with a single phone call. After all, I went out of my way to make sure she wouldn’t feel unnecessarily uncomfortable, but now it seems like my efforts have been in vain.
“Sorry, sorry. It’s just… you’re not very straightforward, are you?”
“…You didn’t notice that after spending two weeks together?”
“Ahaha. I guess not.”
Hayashi laughed for a while and then looked at me.
“Really, you’re such a twisted person. Have you been like this since high school?”
“Even before high school, actually.”
“You’re beyond help, huh?”
“Right?”
“…If you were more open with your emotions, I think you could have had a more enjoyable time.”
“Whether my life has been enjoyable or not is for me to decide, not for you to define.”
“You’re right.”
“…You’re admitting it?”
“Because, thanks to your twisted nature, I was saved.”
…I wonder if that’s really the case.
This time, I was able to help Hayashi because we happened to be high school classmates, she happened to walk into the convenience store where I work, and I happened to notice her injury.
It’s a result born from a combination of timing, luck, and background.
But, on the other hand, if someone else had the same timing, luck, and background, they would have undoubtedly saved her.
Maybe I shouldn’t have been the one to save her at that time. Perhaps someone more suitable should have saved her.
I’m not being pessimistic.
This is just a general theory.
In fact, according to Hayashi, Kasahara was very surprised when I saved her. Above all, I didn’t seem like the kind of person who would save Hayashi. Isn’t that what it means?
…I’ll stop thinking about it any further.
Thoughts like these usually lower my motivation and dampen my mood.
Changing my mindset.
That’s one of the techniques I’ve developed after failing at various things to build a better life.
“…Hey, Yamamoto?”
“What?”
“…Do you have time during Obon?”
I was recently asked a similar question by her.
“I do.”
At that time, I was asked to accompany her to buy a smartphone.
“So, do you want to go on a little date?”
…But this time.
“Does it have to be me?”
“…Hmm, I wonder.”
Hayashi hesitated for a moment, then looked at me with a serious expression.
“Yes. It has to be you.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re the one who saved my life.”
That was only made possible by the right timing, luck, and background. But, regardless of how it happened, it’s also a fact that I made it happen.
“Also… I’ll be leaving here soon, after all.”
Hayashi’s search for a new place is progressing reasonably smoothly.
She’s close to signing a contract with a real estate agency.
…Indeed.
As a farewell gesture for her, who will be leaving here soon…
It might be good to go on a date just once.
“Alright.”
I soon agreed.
“Thank you!”
The one who smiled happily was Hayashi.
