Chapter 43
Chapter 43
****
Breakfast the next day went as quietly as yesterday.
Whenever Alec added a few words, Evely replied rather shortly. It wasn’t she deliberately wanted to do so, it’s just that she wasn’t
used to the sudden change in his environment. Being taken care of by the servants was one thing she couldn’t get used to, and watching them serving her made her feel uncomfortable.
What’s the point of meeting a grandfather with a high status and finding her identity?
After Evely finished her meal, the servant invited her to go for a simple walk. When she said she would just rest in her room because she would leave home soon, tea and refreshments were prepared immediately.
“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it? The garden is beautiful.”
The sunlight shining through the window was warm and the air was crisp. Evely smiled as she turned away and looked out the window.
Then she added a few words to the servant next to her.
“It’s really good that the weather is so nice today, it’s hard for the carriage to run when it rains.”
“Take it easy, Miss.”
It was a polite voice. All the new servants were nice to her.
‘Did they know that I was the servant who worked in this house?’
“I am not from here, so I will not be staying long.”
“You will have to stay longer.”
Evely laughed inwardly. As a servant, she knew better than anyone else that it was just a ritualistic phrase used by the servants.
‘The longer I stay, the more work you’ll have to do, don’t you think? How many people do you have to attend to? I think the sooner I get out of here, the better.’
There were too many memories here. Whenever she was here, the memory of loving him always shook her to the point of dizziness. And she hated it.
“I don’t want to be here.”
Evely answered. But there was no reply from the maid. When there was no reply, Evely turned her head and tried to correct her words.
“Oh, of course, everyone is very nice…”
At that moment, Alec strode into the room.
“Oh, master, what’s going on?”
“Count.”
He rephrased Evely’s words lightly.
“Oh, yes, Count.”
“Or you can call me by my name.”
For a moment Evely was at a loss for words. Alec stared at Evely without saying a word. Then, at the end of that silence, he added a word curtly.
“You haven’t gone yet.”
“I thought we could have a cup of tea.”
Evely naturally suggested.
“Thank you for helping me find my family. Thanks to you, my identity…”
“I only recovered your identity with the intention of making you my bride anyway.”
‘Bride’ was a word that felt like a dream. Like a dream she wakes up from, like a dessert that melts right in her mouth. Evely doubted the moment.
‘Is it because I couldn’t be sure of him?’
“…Do you like me?”
The words came out of nowhere and Alec stared at Evely. She spat out a rather abrupt question nonchalantly.
“I find this whole situation a little strange. Before this, you only wanted pleasure.”
Her tone, not blatantly twisted, but oozing with a certain amount of resentment, came out of her mouth worse than he expected.
He had never expressed his heart to her. Indirectly he treated her in a special way and helped her, but never once did he verbally express his feelings. He pushed everything through without telling her, and even threatened to delay Brianna’s marriage if she didn’t come back.
‘Do I want him to confess that he loves me?’
The more she thought about it, the crazier she felt.
“What’s wrong with pleasure?”
“I didn’t like it like that…”
“Didn’t you like sleeping with me ……?”
Alec cut her off, not even listening to what she was saying. She could feel his voice sinking lower.
“You didn’t want me to…”
“No, that’s not what I meant.”
‘It’s not that I didn’t like it. I just felt hurt.’
She was obviously hurt when he treated her carelessly, or when she couldn’t shake the feeling that he humiliated her in front of Daniel.
It wasn’t really that she didn’t want him to make love to her. It was good to sleep with him. She liked being held in his arms more than anything. She just didn’t like the way he thought of her as a possession and did whatever he wanted.
But Evely did not explain.
“I misspoke. I’m sorry, but things have suddenly changed and I have a lot on my mind. You helped me…”
She apologized quickly.
Her mind and her heart felt different. Her mind and her heart were both grateful, but in a corner of her heart, she just wanted to run away. Especially when he just went ahead with everything without telling her.
‘Don’t my feelings matter to him even a bit?”
Perhaps he just took her like the spoils of war and territory he had won.
Soon Evely changed the subject.
“It’s been quite a while. I am going to see my grandfather. If you’ll excuse me first.”
Evely bowed politely, then hurriedly stepped towards the door.
“Evely.”
And as soon as she stepped to the door, she felt something big and hard grabbed her wrist. As she turned her body in a strong grip, she could see the glove was on his hand. He seemed to have taken it off in a haste.
Alec’s twisted voice bit into her ear.
“I guess you didn’t want me to hold you.”
He grinned as he stared at Evely. There was a hint of confusion in the woman’s eyes. He didn’t know if she was confused or why he had grabbed her wrist.
“I hate being here.”
Alec smiled mockingly as he recalled those words. His mind was already warped from hearing that, but he impatiently tried to suppress it. But when Evely said it again, he couldn’t take it anymore.
‘But what should I do?’
Just as Evely was about to say something to him, he pushed her against the door. His voice trailed off faintly as her back hit the door.
“I’m sorry, but I’ve always wanted to hold you.”
His breath was close, as if it could touch her.
Their breathing seemed to be the only sound in the quiet room.
“Even at this very moment…”
He looked down arrogantly at Evely and lifted the hem of her dress. Then, suddenly, he put his hands inside her skirt, grabbing her white, soft thighs with his big hands. At that moment, Evely gasped and swallowed her breath.
“……. Are you going to take me here?”
Her body responded steadily to the mere touch of his hand. Her mind, however, was different from her body. She hated him for treating her this way.
Evely asked him, not avoiding his gaze.
“If this is the case, why did you give me my identity back? Wouldn’t it be better for you to just keep me as your servant?”
“Of course it would. It would have been much easier for me to have you.”
Alec answered quickly. Then, staring into Evely’s eyes, he touched the inside of her flower fearlessly. Then he stroked it slowly, as if he was savoring it. His touch was skillful yet arrogant, as he touched it at will, as if it was his own.
“I don’t think you’d want much of it anyway. Neither your status, nor mine.”
Evely did not answer. Alec also stopped asking.
After a few moments of silence, Evely slowly opened her mouth.
“I’ve spent a lot more time here than I thought I would. I’m afraid I’ll be late. My grandfather is waiting for me.”
He stared at Evely as she spat out. Then he let go of her. After a few moments of hesitation, Evely quickly got to her feet and slipped away from him.
Alec shook his head in frustration as he watched Evely disappear into the distance.
“Ha…”
He felt a throbbing headache.
Nothing ever went the way he wanted it to. He was too easily swayed by Evely’s words. The moment she said she didn’t like him, he felt as frustrated as a dry desert land. He was nervous and anxious. He had always kept calm on the battlefield, so how could he be so swept away by the words of one small woman?
He delayed Brianna’s marriage for a reason, to buy him some time. He thought he just had to comfort Evely’s mind. But he didn’t know why everything went so wrong.
“You don’t have a woman, you don’t know any women, and you roam the battlefield every day.”
Instantly, the words of Rose grazed him in a nasty way. It was true. There was no woman, he didn’t know, he didn’t have desire to know. It had nothing to do with him.
He wasn’t interested in what a normal woman does. He just wanted to know what Evely liked.
***
“Does it suit your taste, Evely?”
“Yes.”
Her grandparents lived in the middle of nowhere, but fortunately not too far away. William treated her to a table full of sumptuous food. His step son and his wife were there with him. Gently, his wife said to Evely.
“Please eat a lot.”
“Yes, thank you.”
She replied politely. Immediately Evely brought a thin slice of meat to her plate, cut it into small pieces and began to eat. Each of Evely’s bite brought a smile to William’s mouth.
“By the way, Evely, I don’t know if this is the right time to ask this, but ……what is your relationship with Count Bernhardt?”
For a moment Evely looked at William in panic. Then she prolonged her words with a hmm, and was troubled.
“I worked for him in his castle…”
“I heard that you were working for him. And he told me about you, that he persuaded his Majesty. But it is unusual for a grown woman to stay in the castle of a man who has no wife.”
“…”
“The story would be a little different if the two of you were in a special relationship.”
While Evely was wondering what to say, Williams’s voice came first.
“Your father loved your mother, a commoner. I told him that if he still wanted to, he could have her by his side as a mistress, but he wouldn’t listen to me. Eventually I couldn’t take it anymore and kicked him out. I thought that if I kicked him out, he would come back.”
“…”
“It was a miscalculation, arrogance, and a wrong decision.”
The way he spat out the words was self-mocking.
Evely’s mother talked to her about her father, but never about his status. She only vaguely knew that they loved each other and ran away. At the time, she was just a child, so she accepted it without a second thought, but she wondered if her life would be any different if she questioned why they ran away.
“Sometimes I think the lives of parents and children repeat themselves.”
His voice was firm.
“Do you want to marry him?”
‘Marriage.’
These days, she felt like more people around her talked about marriage.
“In fact, I thought you had a relationship with him, so I allowed you to stay in his castle.”
“Oh….”
“If you say you don’t like him, I’ll find you someone. He’ll be a good man.”
“Someone…”
Evely replied with an awkward smile.
“You are past the age of marriage and will have to marry. If you like, I’ll find you a good man.”
“I’m still not sure what marriage is all about. Thank you for your concern.”
“Yes. Think about it.”
Spending time with William was more familiar than the first time.
After they finished eating, William told Evely about her father, and Evely told William about her mother in response. She wanted to let her grandfather know that her mother was a good person, and how happy her father was with her mother.
***
****
Breakfast the next day went as quietly as yesterday.
Whenever Alec added a few words, Evely replied rather shortly. It wasn’t she deliberately wanted to do so, it’s just that she wasn’t
used to the sudden change in his environment. Being taken care of by the servants was one thing she couldn’t get used to, and watching them serving her made her feel uncomfortable.
What’s the point of meeting a grandfather with a high status and finding her identity?
After Evely finished her meal, the servant invited her to go for a simple walk. When she said she would just rest in her room because she would leave home soon, tea and refreshments were prepared immediately.
“It’s a lovely day, isn’t it? The garden is beautiful.”
The sunlight shining through the window was warm and the air was crisp. Evely smiled as she turned away and looked out the window.
Then she added a few words to the servant next to her.
“It’s really good that the weather is so nice today, it’s hard for the carriage to run when it rains.”
“Take it easy, Miss.”
It was a polite voice. All the new servants were nice to her.
‘Did they know that I was the servant who worked in this house?’
“I am not from here, so I will not be staying long.”
“You will have to stay longer.”
Evely laughed inwardly. As a servant, she knew better than anyone else that it was just a ritualistic phrase used by the servants.
‘The longer I stay, the more work you’ll have to do, don’t you think? How many people do you have to attend to? I think the sooner I get out of here, the better.’
There were too many memories here. Whenever she was here, the memory of loving him always shook her to the point of dizziness. And she hated it.
“I don’t want to be here.”
Evely answered. But there was no reply from the maid. When there was no reply, Evely turned her head and tried to correct her words.
“Oh, of course, everyone is very nice…”
At that moment, Alec strode into the room.
“Oh, master, what’s going on?”
“Count.”
He rephrased Evely’s words lightly.
“Oh, yes, Count.”
“Or you can call me by my name.”
For a moment Evely was at a loss for words. Alec stared at Evely without saying a word. Then, at the end of that silence, he added a word curtly.
“You haven’t gone yet.”
“I thought we could have a cup of tea.”
Evely naturally suggested.
“Thank you for helping me find my family. Thanks to you, my identity…”
“I only recovered your identity with the intention of making you my bride anyway.”
‘Bride’ was a word that felt like a dream. Like a dream she wakes up from, like a dessert that melts right in her mouth. Evely doubted the moment.
‘Is it because I couldn’t be sure of him?’
“…Do you like me?”
The words came out of nowhere and Alec stared at Evely. She spat out a rather abrupt question nonchalantly.
“I find this whole situation a little strange. Before this, you only wanted pleasure.”
Her tone, not blatantly twisted, but oozing with a certain amount of resentment, came out of her mouth worse than he expected.
He had never expressed his heart to her. Indirectly he treated her in a special way and helped her, but never once did he verbally express his feelings. He pushed everything through without telling her, and even threatened to delay Brianna’s marriage if she didn’t come back.
‘Do I want him to confess that he loves me?’
The more she thought about it, the crazier she felt.
“What’s wrong with pleasure?”
“I didn’t like it like that…”
“Didn’t you like sleeping with me ……?”
Alec cut her off, not even listening to what she was saying. She could feel his voice sinking lower.
“You didn’t want me to…”
“No, that’s not what I meant.”
‘It’s not that I didn’t like it. I just felt hurt.’
She was obviously hurt when he treated her carelessly, or when she couldn’t shake the feeling that he humiliated her in front of Daniel.
It wasn’t really that she didn’t want him to make love to her. It was good to sleep with him. She liked being held in his arms more than anything. She just didn’t like the way he thought of her as a possession and did whatever he wanted.
But Evely did not explain.
“I misspoke. I’m sorry, but things have suddenly changed and I have a lot on my mind. You helped me…”
She apologized quickly.
Her mind and her heart felt different. Her mind and her heart were both grateful, but in a corner of her heart, she just wanted to run away. Especially when he just went ahead with everything without telling her.
‘Don’t my feelings matter to him even a bit?”
Perhaps he just took her like the spoils of war and territory he had won.
Soon Evely changed the subject.
“It’s been quite a while. I am going to see my grandfather. If you’ll excuse me first.”
Evely bowed politely, then hurriedly stepped towards the door.
“Evely.”
And as soon as she stepped to the door, she felt something big and hard grabbed her wrist. As she turned her body in a strong grip, she could see the glove was on his hand. He seemed to have taken it off in a haste.
Alec’s twisted voice bit into her ear.
“I guess you didn’t want me to hold you.”
He grinned as he stared at Evely. There was a hint of confusion in the woman’s eyes. He didn’t know if she was confused or why he had grabbed her wrist.
“I hate being here.”
Alec smiled mockingly as he recalled those words. His mind was already warped from hearing that, but he impatiently tried to suppress it. But when Evely said it again, he couldn’t take it anymore.
‘But what should I do?’
Just as Evely was about to say something to him, he pushed her against the door. His voice trailed off faintly as her back hit the door.
“I’m sorry, but I’ve always wanted to hold you.”
His breath was close, as if it could touch her.
Their breathing seemed to be the only sound in the quiet room.
“Even at this very moment…”
He looked down arrogantly at Evely and lifted the hem of her dress. Then, suddenly, he put his hands inside her skirt, grabbing her white, soft thighs with his big hands. At that moment, Evely gasped and swallowed her breath.
“……. Are you going to take me here?”
Her body responded steadily to the mere touch of his hand. Her mind, however, was different from her body. She hated him for treating her this way.
Evely asked him, not avoiding his gaze.
“If this is the case, why did you give me my identity back? Wouldn’t it be better for you to just keep me as your servant?”
“Of course it would. It would have been much easier for me to have you.”
Alec answered quickly. Then, staring into Evely’s eyes, he touched the inside of her flower fearlessly. Then he stroked it slowly, as if he was savoring it. His touch was skillful yet arrogant, as he touched it at will, as if it was his own.
“I don’t think you’d want much of it anyway. Neither your status, nor mine.”
Evely did not answer. Alec also stopped asking.
After a few moments of silence, Evely slowly opened her mouth.
“I’ve spent a lot more time here than I thought I would. I’m afraid I’ll be late. My grandfather is waiting for me.”
He stared at Evely as she spat out. Then he let go of her. After a few moments of hesitation, Evely quickly got to her feet and slipped away from him.
Alec shook his head in frustration as he watched Evely disappear into the distance.
“Ha…”
He felt a throbbing headache.
Nothing ever went the way he wanted it to. He was too easily swayed by Evely’s words. The moment she said she didn’t like him, he felt as frustrated as a dry desert land. He was nervous and anxious. He had always kept calm on the battlefield, so how could he be so swept away by the words of one small woman?
He delayed Brianna’s marriage for a reason, to buy him some time. He thought he just had to comfort Evely’s mind. But he didn’t know why everything went so wrong.
“You don’t have a woman, you don’t know any women, and you roam the battlefield every day.”
Instantly, the words of Rose grazed him in a nasty way. It was true. There was no woman, he didn’t know, he didn’t have desire to know. It had nothing to do with him.
He wasn’t interested in what a normal woman does. He just wanted to know what Evely liked.
***
“Does it suit your taste, Evely?”
“Yes.”
Her grandparents lived in the middle of nowhere, but fortunately not too far away. William treated her to a table full of sumptuous food. His step son and his wife were there with him. Gently, his wife said to Evely.
“Please eat a lot.”
“Yes, thank you.”
She replied politely. Immediately Evely brought a thin slice of meat to her plate, cut it into small pieces and began to eat. Each of Evely’s bite brought a smile to William’s mouth.
“By the way, Evely, I don’t know if this is the right time to ask this, but ……what is your relationship with Count Bernhardt?”
For a moment Evely looked at William in panic. Then she prolonged her words with a hmm, and was troubled.
“I worked for him in his castle…”
“I heard that you were working for him. And he told me about you, that he persuaded his Majesty. But it is unusual for a grown woman to stay in the castle of a man who has no wife.”
“…”
“The story would be a little different if the two of you were in a special relationship.”
While Evely was wondering what to say, Williams’s voice came first.
“Your father loved your mother, a commoner. I told him that if he still wanted to, he could have her by his side as a mistress, but he wouldn’t listen to me. Eventually I couldn’t take it anymore and kicked him out. I thought that if I kicked him out, he would come back.”
“…”
“It was a miscalculation, arrogance, and a wrong decision.”
The way he spat out the words was self-mocking.
Evely’s mother talked to her about her father, but never about his status. She only vaguely knew that they loved each other and ran away. At the time, she was just a child, so she accepted it without a second thought, but she wondered if her life would be any different if she questioned why they ran away.
“Sometimes I think the lives of parents and children repeat themselves.”
His voice was firm.
“Do you want to marry him?”
‘Marriage.’
These days, she felt like more people around her talked about marriage.
“In fact, I thought you had a relationship with him, so I allowed you to stay in his castle.”
“Oh….”
“If you say you don’t like him, I’ll find you someone. He’ll be a good man.”
“Someone…”
Evely replied with an awkward smile.
“You are past the age of marriage and will have to marry. If you like, I’ll find you a good man.”
“I’m still not sure what marriage is all about. Thank you for your concern.”
“Yes. Think about it.”
Spending time with William was more familiar than the first time.
After they finished eating, William told Evely about her father, and Evely told William about her mother in response. She wanted to let her grandfather know that her mother was a good person, and how happy her father was with her mother.
***
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