Chapter 41: 'Look, I’m Fine!”

I made my way down the hill with Endure activated to give myself a look of stability and strength. With that ability switched on, the pain wasn't half as debilitating, but it was still there, impossible to ignore, and it did nothing to help with the wounds.

Ivy had delivered a fresh change of clothes, including my cape and my long-sleeved shirt. We had all agreed--even her--that it would be better for the moment to obscure the extent of my injuries so as not to drive the girls into a renewed panic as they'd only just started to calm down by the sound of things.

I tied the cape tight against my neck to try to hide the burns that were there. Of course, the girls had already seen them, but I thought, just maybe, they would forget about the extent and severity of them if I put on a strong face and hid the wounds. It was ironic, I realized, that this was what I was opting to do because I initially refused the jackalope girl Jammy's attempts to use illusions to shroud the injuries.

Still, it was necessary. I wouldn't hide them forever. I couldn't. The girls would want me to spend romantic time with them soon, and once my shirt came off, the jig would be up. I hated the idea of seeing them freaking out again, driving them into terror and panic, but a twisted part of my soul felt a sick tinge of validation at the idea, too; May Belle's gasp when she saw how badly I'd been injured, Daisy's tears, Autumn's fear--it would all be exquisite in its own way. But I didn't want them to feel those things for me, even if it felt good to know they cared. All I wanted was for them to be happy and feel safe, so I would do everything I could to make sure they did.

I marched down the hill without so much as a cane, demonstrating just how strong and independent I already was after just a day of rest. In truth, I was much better than even I expected I would be, even without the Endure ability powering me. I could probably thank the holstaur milk and Etherea's matronly care for that, not to mention Ivy's help.

Instead of running to me, though, Daisy and May Belle watched, staring at me as I approached like I was a ghost. Sprinkle alone shot up and ran over to greet me.

"My Bucky!" she shouted. She closed the distance between us, and I readied myself for pain. She threw her arms around me and hugged tightly. I winced, but I hid it by burying my face in her shoulder. From behind her, Autumn, Daisy, and May Belle exchanged glances and started making their way over as well.

But there was something off about them. Their faces weren't the wide grins I was expecting. They were fearful, cautious, with eyes that gaped at me unbelievingly as though I'd come back from the dead.

"Hey," I said, smiling at them, breaking the hug with Sprinkle. "Come here," I grunted, "I haven't seen you in over a day!"

May Belle marched over to me, her eyes glowing and head cocked with skepticism. She grabbed my arms and tore off the sleeve with surprising strength. The warped and charred flesh of my arms was scarcely visible beneath the fresh bandages. Sprinkle gasped at the sight.

"You expect us to believe you're okay, Bucky-Baby?" May Belle said, her eyes watering already. Daisy just stood back, staring at me emptily. "We worried... sooo much! You came back after just one day with burns from a dragon and expect us to believe everything is normal again? Please don't hold back on us!"

I frowned. "I'm sorry, I--"

Ivy stepped in. She'd been following behind me. "It was my idea to hide the wounds," she said with a sigh. "Don't blame him. He feels bad enough."

It didn't dispel the storm clouds on May Belle's face. "I... love you... so much. You marked me! I'm yours, forever! Can you imagine what we felt, thinking we might lose you? I'm sorry, I don't mean to unload on you..." She trailed off, looking at me expectantly to say something. I wasn't sure she knew exactly what point she was trying to make.

I shook my head but said nothing. I looked at Daisy, expecting a "humph!" or a string of epithets, but she said nothing.

"Daisy hasn't spoken a word all day," Autumn said, running her hand through the holstaur's golden-brown hair. "Yesterday, she spent the whole afternoon repeating 'Bucky will be fine' to herself in the field. Today she won't even say a word."

My heart throbbed with guilt and urgency. "Daisy?" I said cautiously, taking a step toward her--too fast, too sudden. "I'm fine. At least, I'm going to be fine. I'm sorry I made you all worry--I really am. I was reckless--"

"SO reckless!" May Belle shouted as tears flew off her face. She stomped her hooves on the ground, wiped her eyes, and continued. "Okay. I know. I forbid you to go adventuring."

Autumn sighed. "May Belle, he's an Apex Hero. You can't--"

"If you go adventuring again, I'll kill myself," she said flatly, crossing her arms. It was not a joke, but I certainly hoped it was a bluff.

"Don't say that," I said, tears stinging my own eyes. Her own face instantly melted at the sight of my own sadness. My heart felt as though it'd fallen sick all of a sudden, like it was suddenly a century older and weaker.

"Please," she continued, this time more quietly. Her brow was furrowed to a degree I'd never seen before. She didn't have a single line on her face from frowning because she was the sunniest, happiest, sweetest girl I'd ever met. This--I didn't know how to deal with this. "I will have nothing to live for if you die."

"You need to calm down," Autumn said, placing her hands on May Belle's shoulders. "Relax. This isn't helping."

"May Belle, that's too much," Sprinkle cooed. I almost laughed at that--thankfully, I didn't. There was something amusing about Rainbow Sprinkle being the voice of reason to May Belle. I thought I knew these girls. It turns out they were way more nuanced and less predictable than I'd perhaps given them all credit for.

"You won't kill yourself. That's not even a little charming or funny," I said.

Ivy grunted her agreement. "Shame on you, May Belle. He's been through enough. I was cross with him, too, but you're making this about you. It's about Lusteria. Don't forget. His quest matters."

"You matter, too," I added, looking at all of them. "Don't ever doubt that or play down your importance to me. You are all the core of who I am. I love you more than Lusteria, that's for damn sure."

"May Belle," Autumn clucked, "Please calm down. You're going to regret this later."

She sobbed like a little girl, crumbling to her knees. I caught her halfway down, holding her in my arms. May Belle tried in vain to push herself away from me but ultimately melted against my bandaged chest. "I can smell the dragon-fire on your neck," she wept. "I can't lose you, Bucky-Baby. I'd die. It'd be worse than dying. I'd--I'd risk anything else before I risked you."

I wrapped my arms tightly around her. "I promise, I'm not going anywhere. I won't die. I will get stronger. Smarter. More cautious. And I will bring Sprinkle or Ivy with me every time I go out. I'll always have a backup plan. I won't put you through this again."

"You put me through it once. Look at Daisy."

I did. Daisy's eyes were still wide and vacant, but she was staring at me like I was a hallucination, a mirage. "Look at her. She's broken. I'll be broken, too, if you leave my sight again. I'm sorry... I can't bear it."

"Daisy just needs time. We'll all be fne. We have to bear it, May Belle," Autumn said sadly behind her. "Bucky needs you to be strong. He's already promised what he can. Forgive him."

"I forgive you," she sobbed instantly. "Of course I do. I was never mad at you, really. I just--I'm so scared. What if I lose you!? I'll fucking die!"

"That kind of talk needs to stop right now," I insisted. "That doesn't make me feel any better. We need to just accept that what happened has happened, and we all have to move on." I kissed her forehead, and she nodded reluctantly.

"You're right."

I stood up and took a step closer to Daisy, whose eyes never left mine. "Daisy," I said softly. "Daisy, it's me. Do you remember me?"

She kept staring, her face cold and unfeeling--until I brushed her cheek. Upon my touch, her eyes flew wide open, and tears cascaded down her face. She threw herself so hard into me that she knocked me over, and I fell backward onto the ground with her on top of me. It hurt--badly. But I put on a strong face.

"Honey!" she shouted. "Is it really you!?"

"Of course it's me! What did you think?" I asked in genuine shock, trying to hide the agony of her body pressing against my wounds. I couldn't blame her for this. She wasn't fully in her right mind yet.

"I thought I was dreaming--I thought that I'd lost you," she cried, bawling like a baby into my shoulder. I stroked her hair and grunted. Autumn's face showed that she understood my pain at that moment, but she said nothing. "Don't ever do that to us again!"

"I'll scratch it off my To-Do List for tomorrow," I said, entombing Daisy in my embrace. She glared at me.

"That's not funny," she said.

"My Bucky?" Sprinkle's voice chimed in with an unfamiliar tone. Gumi was looming behind her, staring down at me, far less concerned than the others--probably not really comprehending what had happened.

"Yes, Sprink?"

"Do you love me?"

I looked up at her from where I cradled Daisy on the ground. "Of course I do," I said, cocking a confused eyebrow. "What the hell kind of question is that?"

"If you love me, if you love us, then let us fight with you. You don't know how strong your girls have all become."

"I can breathe fire," Daisy cooed in my ear.

"I can rip a tree out of the ground with my bare hands," added May Belle.

Autumn nodded her agreement. "I can carve through a rock with my claws," she said, holding up her hands. "Your level-ups were more effective than we thought they would be, due to us being so close to you, an Apex Hero."

I swallowed hard. "I'll think about it," I nodded. "But I'll want us all wearing armor and having appropriate weapons, at least in the long term."

"Bonny owes me," Daisy smirked, though her eyes still looked a bit haunted and far away. "I'll tell her."

"The harem that slays together stays together," Autumn giggled.

Ivy chimed in again. "Bucky," she said my name softly to get my attention.

I relinquished my embrace of Daisy and stood up. "Yeah, Ivy?"

"Would you sleep with me in the treehouse tomorrow?" she asked. "I have a lot to say."

My eyes were drawn to the others, seeking their opinions. They nodded knowingly, apparently granting their approval.

"Alright," I agreed. "Of course." Harem life was busy as fuck.

Ivy grinned, though, and that look on her face was enough to set me at ease for the moment.

Our minute of calm was abruptly cut short by the sound of a horn blaring off in the distance. I looked out toward the sound, and noticed out of the corner of my eyes that my girls all looked equally alarmed and surprised by it. It couldn't be good, then.

"Orcs!" Autumn grunted in shock. "A war horn!" She looked around frantically, her eyes darting everywhere as she processed the sound and what it meant. "But how!?"

"The centaurs should have stopped them!" Ivy said with a tremulous voice. "This could be terrible news!"

"The timing couldn't be worse!" May Belle shrieked, but that wasn't true. Literally a day ago and I'd have been in no shape at all to fight. As it stood right at this moment, I was still in rough condition, but I could defend if I had to.

A dozen flaming arrows hit the cabin, setting it alight almost instantly. My fists balled up at the cursed sight of my home set aflame. It was simply logs and sticks and grass and mud, after all--but it was my home.

This was a brazen attack. A declaration of war. There was no doubt that we were about to come to blows. "Girls, go hide!" I shouted, summoning the magic lance, "Don't worry about me! I'm wearing my armor, so I'll be fine!"

"We just talked about this!" Sprinkle squealed in irritation. She darted behind me, following in my path as I charged the horde that had appeared in the distance. Maybe twenty orcs and ogres, each larger than me, could be seen on the horizon. "We're coming with you!"

"We are all in this battle!" shouted Autumn--that one shocked me the most.

Wordlessly, the holstaurs joined the fray. Gumi must have stayed back--she was still so simple, so confused by it all, and we didn't have time to explain. We let her hide in the fields, and I could only hope she would be alright. I had to believe she would be. I grimaced at the thought of any of my girls, even her, being caught in the line of fire or getting hurt in the battle. As it would turn out, my fears were utterly misplaced.