CH 20
「I can wear a hickey.」
Miyagi says simply and takes off her blazer.
Then the sleeves of her blouse were rolled up and her arms were held out.
Wrong.
It’s not like this.
I didn’t want her to resist, but I didn’t want her to say okay unhesitatingly. I wanted to drag Miyagi down to the same place as I was, but if she was not going to come down there herself.
This makes me feel like I’m following Miyagi, and that makes me cringe.
Besides, Miyagi should be as confused and angry as I am. Miyagi should not have told me that it was okay to wear a hickey.
「Still good.」
I lower Miyagi’s rolled up sleeves.
Wearing a hickey in the first place is an unnecessary act between us.
It doesn’t matter anymore.
I decided to think so and took a slow breath to calm myself down. But before I could exhale, Miyagi said to me, she’s not going to do it.
「Did Sendai-san told me to give my own arm?」
「Because, this is not the kind of thing you do to a friend.」
Regardless of the purpose, Miyagi is a friend because I visit her home after school and spends time with her. Although I feel that Miyagi is a little different from a typical friend, I think that in the larger scheme of things, she is within the scope of a friend.
But denied my words.
「——Me and Sendai-san are not friends.」
So.
I finally understand what Miyagi has been doing so far.
Because we are not friends, she gave me a subtle look at my friend’s chocolate and told me not to cook dinner.
It was not a friend to give unusual orders.
But, then.
What kind of relationship do we have?
At least, I consider Miyagi as a friend.
We don’t see each other on days when there is no school, and we only keep our contact to the bare minimum. But if I drop by after school and talk about trivial things, we are friends.
But for Miyagi, it’s different.
「If we are not friends, what are we?」
I say the question honestly.
「What do you mean, how should I know?」
She said angrily, and Miyagi rolled up her sleeves once more.
「Here.」
With a short, light voice, an arm is held out to me.
To put it bluntly, it is not very pleasant feeling to have someone you thought was a friend to deny it. But when I think about it, I don’t think Miyagi and I have that kind of relationship that would warrant the term “friend.”
It’s just the way things are.
I was just interested in Miyagi and wanted to know what kind of orders she would give. If I had a bad day, I could just return the 5,000 yen and be done with it. With this in mind, I started going to her room.
Without the 5,000 yen, there was only a flimsy connection that would have been severed.
Still, unlike Miyagi the day she poured cider on me, she didn’t seem to be trying to put me off today, so I carefully chose words that would definitely describe our relationship.
「I’m not Miyagi’s lover.」
「Does that mean I can’t wear a hickey if I’m not your lover?」
「Isn’t that the general rule?」
「Suddenly you’re talking like a neat and tidy person. You look like playing around.」
「I’m “not” like that. I’m innocent. And I’ve been telling you for a while now that I’m not playing around.」
I know Miyagi is saying this on purpose.
But I will firmly correct the dishonorable remarks she often makes about me.
「If Sendai-san says so, I’ll assume that’s the case… You know, there are people who do this kind of thing even if they are not your friends or lovers.」
「I’m sure there are some, but not for me.」
「It’s already too late to say that when I’m already on your trail, not your lover.」
I see.
You have a point.
——No, no, it’s not, it’s not.
It’s wrong to throw into the category of people who do those things even if you are not my lover because I was followed by someone who is not my lover.
Besides, if someone tells me to wear a hickey from Miyagi, I don’t want to wear it. I was the one who tried to put a mark on Miyagi’s arm, but when she came at me like that, I wanted to run away.
「Then, I order you.」
I refurse to move, and Miyagi utters words that I cannot resist.
「Do the same thing I did.」
Her voice sounded like she wanted proof that we were not friends.
I’m sure it is like a treadmill.
This makes it clear that Miyagi and I are not friends.
The order is now for me to do such an act.
「Understood.」
I understood the order, but I was not convinced.
But I grabbed her arm. Then I opened my lips thinly and pressed them to the same spot where Miyagi had made her mark.
I suck in the skin of her arm as if to breathe, and chug, a small sound echoes in my head.
When I touch the skin with the tip of my tongue, I don’t taste it.
It doesn’t even feel like chewing.
It’s just sucking on it, like drinking juice from a paper carton through a straw.
The skin on my lips is a little cold and soft.
Not bsd to the touch.
I press my lips a little harder and inhale at once.
I looked up as Miyagi’s hand gripped my shoulder as she pressed her teeth against too, like she was biting my arm.
「You’re redder than I thought.」
At the sound of Miyagi’s voice, I drop my gaze to her arm.
There was a red mark on it, like a flower petal.
「What are you going to do with it?」
I press my fingertips on the marks I have made.
「Don’t do anything. Leave it alone. It will disappear soon. Sendai-san, tell them that your boyfriend followed you.」
「I don’t have a boyfriend, and I won’t say anything because it would be misleading.」
There will be no PE class tomorrow.
She never changes her clothes, no one should be able to point out the marks on her place.
I have PE in a few days, but, well, I’d like to think the mark will have faded.
「You know, Miyagi. Aren’t you acting a little strange today?」
I press my hickey on my blouse.
Playing a game I’ve never played before with so many mouths to feed.
She even did acts that would leave orders behind.
「I don’t think it’ll be any different than usual.」
「It’s weird.」
「If you say so. Sendai-san is strange too. You’ve never asked me to do anything like an order before.」
「Yes, but.」
「I don’t care. Can I unbutton this button?」
Without warning, Miyagi touches my blouse, picks up the third button below the top two undone buttons, and pulls it off.
I have no good memories of that button.
The day I was doused with cider flashed through my mind and brow wrinkled.
「I said no. What are you going to do?」
「I’m gonna put one here.」
As she said this, Miyagi removed her hand from the button and and poked it quite a bit below the collarbone.
「I told you I’d beat you up if you made a mark like that, didn’t I?」
「Because Sendai-san didn’t mind wearing a hickey. Besides, Sendai-san only takes off one button at school, that’s why they can’t see it around here.」
I think you’re looking at it very carefully.
Indeed, Miyagi was right: at school, I only unbutton one button on my blouse, and I don’t loosen my tie that much.
Although, she does not abide the school rules, she keeps her ties tight enough not to attract the attention of teachers, so she should not be seen by anyone except when changing clothes around the area where Miyagi poked around.
But that doesn’t mean I can wear a hickey.
「That’s not the point.」
「It’s fine.」
Without telling me it was an order, Miyagi takes off my tie and unbuttons the third button as well.
Without refusing, she opens my chest and brings her face close to mine.
Her breath on my neck, tickling me.
Heat that is not her own approaches the area she pinched.
Her hair touches my skin, and it’s somehow raw.
Consciousness gathered on the surface of my skin and I pushed Miyagi’s shoulder.
「Stop.」
「Boring.」
Miyagi, who had left me so easily, says in a flat voice.
Then, she pinched the part where she was about to put her lips on me from my blouse and pinched it with a fair amount of force.
「Ouch—」
I yell out and grabs Miyagi’s arms, but her hands doesn’t let go.
「If it’s a mark, it’ll stick this way too.」
Saying this, Miyagi put strength into her pinched hands.
She pinched me so hard that I wanted to believe her when she said she was going tear off the meat, and I forcefully stripped off her hand.
「It hurts.」
「I’m just kidding.」
「I’m not stupid. That’s no joke.」
「You wouldn’t leave a mark like that, would you?」
That’s not what I mean.
It simply hurts.
It hurt so much that I didn’t want to make a joke out of it.
Besides, it’s not normal to think of pinching something and leaving a mark.
I think there’s no screw in Miyagi’s head that holds common sense in place.
But even if I told Miyagi that what she was doing now was wrong, there was no way I could get the message across to Miyagi, who seemed to have dropped common sense somewhere along the way.
I gave a small sigh, and Miyagi said in a clerical tone like a teacher giving homework.
「Do you want to stay for dinner.」
「I’ll eat.」
I’m just going to go home and finish my meal alone anyway.
If that’s the case, I’d rather eat with someone else.
I fasten the button that Miyagi has removed.
「Whatever works right?」
When asked and answered,「Sure.」Miyagi gets up and leaves the room as if the previous act and conversation did not exist.
I put on my blazer and look at my arms.
Of course, I can’t see any marks made by Miyagi.
「I knew I should have said no.」
I mutter to myself and leave the room.
Maybe Miyagi needs me.
I need this place, too.
At any rate, there is no doubt that we need each other, but I don’t want this kind of thing to continue.
This relationship is limited and should end together by the end of our highschool years. Considering that we will live a long time in the future, I would say that this relationship is ephemeral. And yet, any act that leaves a mark on the body seems like an act that will make the two of us forever and it makes my stomach heavy.
How long will these marks remain?
I held my arm as I walked to the living room.
Miyagi says simply and takes off her blazer.
Then the sleeves of her blouse were rolled up and her arms were held out.
Wrong.
It’s not like this.
I didn’t want her to resist, but I didn’t want her to say okay unhesitatingly. I wanted to drag Miyagi down to the same place as I was, but if she was not going to come down there herself.
This makes me feel like I’m following Miyagi, and that makes me cringe.
Besides, Miyagi should be as confused and angry as I am. Miyagi should not have told me that it was okay to wear a hickey.
「Still good.」
I lower Miyagi’s rolled up sleeves.
Wearing a hickey in the first place is an unnecessary act between us.
It doesn’t matter anymore.
I decided to think so and took a slow breath to calm myself down. But before I could exhale, Miyagi said to me, she’s not going to do it.
「Did Sendai-san told me to give my own arm?」
「Because, this is not the kind of thing you do to a friend.」
Regardless of the purpose, Miyagi is a friend because I visit her home after school and spends time with her. Although I feel that Miyagi is a little different from a typical friend, I think that in the larger scheme of things, she is within the scope of a friend.
But denied my words.
「——Me and Sendai-san are not friends.」
So.
I finally understand what Miyagi has been doing so far.
Because we are not friends, she gave me a subtle look at my friend’s chocolate and told me not to cook dinner.
It was not a friend to give unusual orders.
But, then.
What kind of relationship do we have?
At least, I consider Miyagi as a friend.
We don’t see each other on days when there is no school, and we only keep our contact to the bare minimum. But if I drop by after school and talk about trivial things, we are friends.
But for Miyagi, it’s different.
「If we are not friends, what are we?」
I say the question honestly.
「What do you mean, how should I know?」
She said angrily, and Miyagi rolled up her sleeves once more.
「Here.」
With a short, light voice, an arm is held out to me.
To put it bluntly, it is not very pleasant feeling to have someone you thought was a friend to deny it. But when I think about it, I don’t think Miyagi and I have that kind of relationship that would warrant the term “friend.”
It’s just the way things are.
I was just interested in Miyagi and wanted to know what kind of orders she would give. If I had a bad day, I could just return the 5,000 yen and be done with it. With this in mind, I started going to her room.
Without the 5,000 yen, there was only a flimsy connection that would have been severed.
Still, unlike Miyagi the day she poured cider on me, she didn’t seem to be trying to put me off today, so I carefully chose words that would definitely describe our relationship.
「I’m not Miyagi’s lover.」
「Does that mean I can’t wear a hickey if I’m not your lover?」
「Isn’t that the general rule?」
「Suddenly you’re talking like a neat and tidy person. You look like playing around.」
「I’m “not” like that. I’m innocent. And I’ve been telling you for a while now that I’m not playing around.」
I know Miyagi is saying this on purpose.
But I will firmly correct the dishonorable remarks she often makes about me.
「If Sendai-san says so, I’ll assume that’s the case… You know, there are people who do this kind of thing even if they are not your friends or lovers.」
「I’m sure there are some, but not for me.」
「It’s already too late to say that when I’m already on your trail, not your lover.」
I see.
You have a point.
——No, no, it’s not, it’s not.
It’s wrong to throw into the category of people who do those things even if you are not my lover because I was followed by someone who is not my lover.
Besides, if someone tells me to wear a hickey from Miyagi, I don’t want to wear it. I was the one who tried to put a mark on Miyagi’s arm, but when she came at me like that, I wanted to run away.
「Then, I order you.」
I refurse to move, and Miyagi utters words that I cannot resist.
「Do the same thing I did.」
Her voice sounded like she wanted proof that we were not friends.
I’m sure it is like a treadmill.
This makes it clear that Miyagi and I are not friends.
The order is now for me to do such an act.
「Understood.」
I understood the order, but I was not convinced.
But I grabbed her arm. Then I opened my lips thinly and pressed them to the same spot where Miyagi had made her mark.
I suck in the skin of her arm as if to breathe, and chug, a small sound echoes in my head.
When I touch the skin with the tip of my tongue, I don’t taste it.
It doesn’t even feel like chewing.
It’s just sucking on it, like drinking juice from a paper carton through a straw.
The skin on my lips is a little cold and soft.
Not bsd to the touch.
I press my lips a little harder and inhale at once.
I looked up as Miyagi’s hand gripped my shoulder as she pressed her teeth against too, like she was biting my arm.
「You’re redder than I thought.」
At the sound of Miyagi’s voice, I drop my gaze to her arm.
There was a red mark on it, like a flower petal.
「What are you going to do with it?」
I press my fingertips on the marks I have made.
「Don’t do anything. Leave it alone. It will disappear soon. Sendai-san, tell them that your boyfriend followed you.」
「I don’t have a boyfriend, and I won’t say anything because it would be misleading.」
There will be no PE class tomorrow.
She never changes her clothes, no one should be able to point out the marks on her place.
I have PE in a few days, but, well, I’d like to think the mark will have faded.
「You know, Miyagi. Aren’t you acting a little strange today?」
I press my hickey on my blouse.
Playing a game I’ve never played before with so many mouths to feed.
She even did acts that would leave orders behind.
「I don’t think it’ll be any different than usual.」
「It’s weird.」
「If you say so. Sendai-san is strange too. You’ve never asked me to do anything like an order before.」
「Yes, but.」
「I don’t care. Can I unbutton this button?」
Without warning, Miyagi touches my blouse, picks up the third button below the top two undone buttons, and pulls it off.
I have no good memories of that button.
The day I was doused with cider flashed through my mind and brow wrinkled.
「I said no. What are you going to do?」
「I’m gonna put one here.」
As she said this, Miyagi removed her hand from the button and and poked it quite a bit below the collarbone.
「I told you I’d beat you up if you made a mark like that, didn’t I?」
「Because Sendai-san didn’t mind wearing a hickey. Besides, Sendai-san only takes off one button at school, that’s why they can’t see it around here.」
I think you’re looking at it very carefully.
Indeed, Miyagi was right: at school, I only unbutton one button on my blouse, and I don’t loosen my tie that much.
Although, she does not abide the school rules, she keeps her ties tight enough not to attract the attention of teachers, so she should not be seen by anyone except when changing clothes around the area where Miyagi poked around.
But that doesn’t mean I can wear a hickey.
「That’s not the point.」
「It’s fine.」
Without telling me it was an order, Miyagi takes off my tie and unbuttons the third button as well.
Without refusing, she opens my chest and brings her face close to mine.
Her breath on my neck, tickling me.
Heat that is not her own approaches the area she pinched.
Her hair touches my skin, and it’s somehow raw.
Consciousness gathered on the surface of my skin and I pushed Miyagi’s shoulder.
「Stop.」
「Boring.」
Miyagi, who had left me so easily, says in a flat voice.
Then, she pinched the part where she was about to put her lips on me from my blouse and pinched it with a fair amount of force.
「Ouch—」
I yell out and grabs Miyagi’s arms, but her hands doesn’t let go.
「If it’s a mark, it’ll stick this way too.」
Saying this, Miyagi put strength into her pinched hands.
She pinched me so hard that I wanted to believe her when she said she was going tear off the meat, and I forcefully stripped off her hand.
「It hurts.」
「I’m just kidding.」
「I’m not stupid. That’s no joke.」
「You wouldn’t leave a mark like that, would you?」
That’s not what I mean.
It simply hurts.
It hurt so much that I didn’t want to make a joke out of it.
Besides, it’s not normal to think of pinching something and leaving a mark.
I think there’s no screw in Miyagi’s head that holds common sense in place.
But even if I told Miyagi that what she was doing now was wrong, there was no way I could get the message across to Miyagi, who seemed to have dropped common sense somewhere along the way.
I gave a small sigh, and Miyagi said in a clerical tone like a teacher giving homework.
「Do you want to stay for dinner.」
「I’ll eat.」
I’m just going to go home and finish my meal alone anyway.
If that’s the case, I’d rather eat with someone else.
I fasten the button that Miyagi has removed.
「Whatever works right?」
When asked and answered,「Sure.」Miyagi gets up and leaves the room as if the previous act and conversation did not exist.
I put on my blazer and look at my arms.
Of course, I can’t see any marks made by Miyagi.
「I knew I should have said no.」
I mutter to myself and leave the room.
Maybe Miyagi needs me.
I need this place, too.
At any rate, there is no doubt that we need each other, but I don’t want this kind of thing to continue.
This relationship is limited and should end together by the end of our highschool years. Considering that we will live a long time in the future, I would say that this relationship is ephemeral. And yet, any act that leaves a mark on the body seems like an act that will make the two of us forever and it makes my stomach heavy.
How long will these marks remain?
I held my arm as I walked to the living room.
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