CH 53
What I would like to do if I were in Miyagi — 53
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
I woke up better than usual.
The reason, needless to think, is Umina.
She dragged me around not only on Saturday but also until Sunday, and I was so tired that I slept so soundly that there was no room for any unnecessary thoughts. I wasn’t planning to play around for two days in a row, but I think I slept well because I was able to put Miyagi out of my mind.
Thanks to this, I was able to go to the prep school as usual and also to come to Miyagi’s house.
If I ignore the slight awkwardness, there is no problem at all.
In fact, like a jade box that should not be opened, neither I nor Miyagi touched Friday. Miyagi handed me 5,000 yen for tutoring, and silently spread the problem book on the table, while I dutifully wrote down the answers to the questions in my notebook.
And now, what we have in this room is peace.
We both know that Friday is just hidden in the problem set and that it didn’t happen while we were solving the problems. Still, it is better to study in an atmosphere of calm, even if only for show, than to study in an atmosphere of subtlety.
The conversation, which was not very lively to begin with, continued to be stagnant and silent, but that was a trivial matter. The world won’t end with so much silence, and neither will our relationship.
I think it is a little too quiet, but better than too loud.
I grab a glass from the table and pour the cold barley tea into my stomach.
Miyagi seems to have stopped caring and today’s room temperature is a little hot for me.
I’d like her to lower the temperature setting a couple more degrees, but I’m not going to tell her.
It’s cooler than it is outside, and I don’t want to do anything to riddle her with Fridays.
「Sendai-san.」
Without warning, Miyagi calls me.
「Were you in front of the station on Sunday?」
「I was there, but why?」
I looked up from my problem book and saw Miyagi, and she was looking at me too.
Perhaps my evil feelings were burned by the hot sun by the time I got here, but even with Miyagi next to me, I don’t mind so much today.
「I saw you walking with Ibaraki-san.」
Miyagi swallows, about to say that it would have been nice if she had called out to me.
We don’t have that kind of relationship.
「Is Miyagi with Utsunomiya then?」
I find an alternative word and speak it.
「Yes, I was out with Maika and the others.」
「What did you do then?」
「Shopping.」
Miyagi, who did not give me an answer when I asked her where she and Utsunomiya were going at the beginning of the summer vacation, readily gave me an answer.
「What was Sendai-san doing?」
「Same there. I was shopping with Umina.」
「Did you have fun?」
Perhaps she was tired of solving problems, or perhaps she was tired of remaining silent, but Miyagi would ask me things she would not normally ask.
「Well, maybe.」
A short answer is met with skepticism.
It’s not that I was so boring that they would look at me that way. Half of the “well, maybe” is true. I was tired of being pushed around by Umina, but I also had fun.
「Did Miyagi also had her fun?」
Not bothering to deny Miyagi’s gaze, I decide to ask her about her Sunday.
「I don’t do things I don’t enjoy.」
「I see. What did you buy then?」
「Various things.」
「What kind of various things, if you may?」
「Whatever I want, you know?」
The bonus time for Miyagi to answer questions seems to be over, and the conversation is cut short. But she had fun yesterday and her voice was not that cold.
I don’t know much about Utsunomiya, but I do know that she is good friends with Miyagi. I have never heard how long they have known each other and how close they are, but I know they must be good friends.
Maybe that kind of relationship is something I don’t have right now.
All I have is a calculating relationship and I envy them a little. And things come into my mind that I don’t need to think about.
I wonder if Utsunomiya can touch Miyagi without thinking about anything.
I am well aware that it is strange to grab a friend and annotate her with “without thinking.” Friends don’t need such annotations.
I think about this stuff because I thought I had lost my evil feelings and half of them are still burning.
——It sucks.
I throw out my pen and plop down on the table.
My forehead makes a dull thumping sound against the table, but I don’t care.
「What’s up all of a sudden?」
I hear Miyagi’s voice, which seems surprised, but I ignore it and ask her to stay down on her haunches.
「Is there anything you don’t understand? Let me know and I’ll teach you.」
「I don’t know what else I don’t understand other than why Sendai-san suddenly plopped down.」
「Well, keep working on the problems then.」
「What the hell?」
「Just a little disillusioned with myself.」
I hate to think that if I let myself go now, I will act in a way that will trace back to Friday.
I had never thought that my reason could be so unreliable. I used to think of Miyagi as a troublesome fellow, but I have become even more of a troublesome fellow.
「Don’t be silly, take it seriously.」
Miyagi says what I would normally say.
「I’ve been working diligently all morning.」
「That’s what you’re talking about at the prep school. Be serious here, too.」
If serious study will free me from this stupid delusion, I will be as serious as I want to be. But I don’t think so. I think I would feel better if I went for a walk in the hot sun.
「Oh, right, Miyagi. Do you have any bread?」
I raise myself up and look at Miyagi.
「Bread?」
「Yes. Also if there’s milk and eggs.」
「No, but if there were, what would you do?」
「Want some French toast?」
「I don’t want to eat it.」
「I want to eat.」
I am not the kind of person to ask someone to go for a walk, and I can’t go out alone without a reason. Then just make up a suitable reason.
I just want to change my mind a little, and when I come back from outside, I think I can solve problems again next to Miyagi without thinking about anything.
She rarely serves food in this room, but it’s not a bad idea to have a snack together once in a while.
「I’ll get the ingredients, wait for me.」
Whether Miyagi wants to eat or not is not the issue, so I get up and pick up my bag.
「I don’t care if it’s French toast or not, I need to study. Properly.」
With a grunt, a box of tissues with an alligator cover comes flying out. I take it in and put the alligator back where it belongs.
「It’s rare for Miyagi to say something like that.」
「I just don’t want Sendai-san to start something all of a sudden because it will cause trouble.」
「That sounds like I’m making a lot of trouble.」
「You’re doing it.」
「I haven’t, and I’m just making French toast today.」
I don’t mean to tell Miyagi, but please don’t stop me from trying to make French toast to avoid the hassle.
「I’m going to go for a bit. Do you want to come with me, Miyagi?」
I declare that I have no intention of changing my mind, and incidentally add the magic words that make Miyagi want to send me off on my own.
「I’m not going. If you want to go, go alone.」
Miyagi uttered the line as I had expected and looked down at her problem book.
「Then, I’m going.」
If I could, I would not want to be in the city in the middle of summer.
It would be hell to walk in a windless city under a sky with no clouds to hide the sun.
But now I need to get out to the steamy city.
I leave Miyagi behind, walk out the front door, and take the elevator.
Sweat immediately beads on my forehead as I step outside through the entrance.
A sweet treat should brighten the mood.
I walk along the sun-drenched sidewalk believing this, though I have no evidence to back it up.
This kind of thing is very Miyagi-like.
I sigh as I look for shade.
She’s inconsistent in her behavior and runs away if something goes wrong.
Perhaps because we have been spending more time together, I am gradually becoming more and more like Miyagi. I don’t want to think that we are becoming more alike. I would like to think that this is just a coincidence and that this is just for today.
Gripping my temples, I drive Miyagi away from my head.
Bread, eggs and milk.
She didn’t ask, but there would indeed be sugar.
I quickened my steps to complete a simple nap.
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
I woke up better than usual.
The reason, needless to think, is Umina.
She dragged me around not only on Saturday but also until Sunday, and I was so tired that I slept so soundly that there was no room for any unnecessary thoughts. I wasn’t planning to play around for two days in a row, but I think I slept well because I was able to put Miyagi out of my mind.
Thanks to this, I was able to go to the prep school as usual and also to come to Miyagi’s house.
If I ignore the slight awkwardness, there is no problem at all.
In fact, like a jade box that should not be opened, neither I nor Miyagi touched Friday. Miyagi handed me 5,000 yen for tutoring, and silently spread the problem book on the table, while I dutifully wrote down the answers to the questions in my notebook.
And now, what we have in this room is peace.
We both know that Friday is just hidden in the problem set and that it didn’t happen while we were solving the problems. Still, it is better to study in an atmosphere of calm, even if only for show, than to study in an atmosphere of subtlety.
The conversation, which was not very lively to begin with, continued to be stagnant and silent, but that was a trivial matter. The world won’t end with so much silence, and neither will our relationship.
I think it is a little too quiet, but better than too loud.
I grab a glass from the table and pour the cold barley tea into my stomach.
Miyagi seems to have stopped caring and today’s room temperature is a little hot for me.
I’d like her to lower the temperature setting a couple more degrees, but I’m not going to tell her.
It’s cooler than it is outside, and I don’t want to do anything to riddle her with Fridays.
「Sendai-san.」
Without warning, Miyagi calls me.
「Were you in front of the station on Sunday?」
「I was there, but why?」
I looked up from my problem book and saw Miyagi, and she was looking at me too.
Perhaps my evil feelings were burned by the hot sun by the time I got here, but even with Miyagi next to me, I don’t mind so much today.
「I saw you walking with Ibaraki-san.」
Miyagi swallows, about to say that it would have been nice if she had called out to me.
We don’t have that kind of relationship.
「Is Miyagi with Utsunomiya then?」
I find an alternative word and speak it.
「Yes, I was out with Maika and the others.」
「What did you do then?」
「Shopping.」
Miyagi, who did not give me an answer when I asked her where she and Utsunomiya were going at the beginning of the summer vacation, readily gave me an answer.
「What was Sendai-san doing?」
「Same there. I was shopping with Umina.」
「Did you have fun?」
Perhaps she was tired of solving problems, or perhaps she was tired of remaining silent, but Miyagi would ask me things she would not normally ask.
「Well, maybe.」
A short answer is met with skepticism.
It’s not that I was so boring that they would look at me that way. Half of the “well, maybe” is true. I was tired of being pushed around by Umina, but I also had fun.
「Did Miyagi also had her fun?」
Not bothering to deny Miyagi’s gaze, I decide to ask her about her Sunday.
「I don’t do things I don’t enjoy.」
「I see. What did you buy then?」
「Various things.」
「What kind of various things, if you may?」
「Whatever I want, you know?」
The bonus time for Miyagi to answer questions seems to be over, and the conversation is cut short. But she had fun yesterday and her voice was not that cold.
I don’t know much about Utsunomiya, but I do know that she is good friends with Miyagi. I have never heard how long they have known each other and how close they are, but I know they must be good friends.
Maybe that kind of relationship is something I don’t have right now.
All I have is a calculating relationship and I envy them a little. And things come into my mind that I don’t need to think about.
I wonder if Utsunomiya can touch Miyagi without thinking about anything.
I am well aware that it is strange to grab a friend and annotate her with “without thinking.” Friends don’t need such annotations.
I think about this stuff because I thought I had lost my evil feelings and half of them are still burning.
——It sucks.
I throw out my pen and plop down on the table.
My forehead makes a dull thumping sound against the table, but I don’t care.
「What’s up all of a sudden?」
I hear Miyagi’s voice, which seems surprised, but I ignore it and ask her to stay down on her haunches.
「Is there anything you don’t understand? Let me know and I’ll teach you.」
「I don’t know what else I don’t understand other than why Sendai-san suddenly plopped down.」
「Well, keep working on the problems then.」
「What the hell?」
「Just a little disillusioned with myself.」
I hate to think that if I let myself go now, I will act in a way that will trace back to Friday.
I had never thought that my reason could be so unreliable. I used to think of Miyagi as a troublesome fellow, but I have become even more of a troublesome fellow.
「Don’t be silly, take it seriously.」
Miyagi says what I would normally say.
「I’ve been working diligently all morning.」
「That’s what you’re talking about at the prep school. Be serious here, too.」
If serious study will free me from this stupid delusion, I will be as serious as I want to be. But I don’t think so. I think I would feel better if I went for a walk in the hot sun.
「Oh, right, Miyagi. Do you have any bread?」
I raise myself up and look at Miyagi.
「Bread?」
「Yes. Also if there’s milk and eggs.」
「No, but if there were, what would you do?」
「Want some French toast?」
「I don’t want to eat it.」
「I want to eat.」
I am not the kind of person to ask someone to go for a walk, and I can’t go out alone without a reason. Then just make up a suitable reason.
I just want to change my mind a little, and when I come back from outside, I think I can solve problems again next to Miyagi without thinking about anything.
She rarely serves food in this room, but it’s not a bad idea to have a snack together once in a while.
「I’ll get the ingredients, wait for me.」
Whether Miyagi wants to eat or not is not the issue, so I get up and pick up my bag.
「I don’t care if it’s French toast or not, I need to study. Properly.」
With a grunt, a box of tissues with an alligator cover comes flying out. I take it in and put the alligator back where it belongs.
「It’s rare for Miyagi to say something like that.」
「I just don’t want Sendai-san to start something all of a sudden because it will cause trouble.」
「That sounds like I’m making a lot of trouble.」
「You’re doing it.」
「I haven’t, and I’m just making French toast today.」
I don’t mean to tell Miyagi, but please don’t stop me from trying to make French toast to avoid the hassle.
「I’m going to go for a bit. Do you want to come with me, Miyagi?」
I declare that I have no intention of changing my mind, and incidentally add the magic words that make Miyagi want to send me off on my own.
「I’m not going. If you want to go, go alone.」
Miyagi uttered the line as I had expected and looked down at her problem book.
「Then, I’m going.」
If I could, I would not want to be in the city in the middle of summer.
It would be hell to walk in a windless city under a sky with no clouds to hide the sun.
But now I need to get out to the steamy city.
I leave Miyagi behind, walk out the front door, and take the elevator.
Sweat immediately beads on my forehead as I step outside through the entrance.
A sweet treat should brighten the mood.
I walk along the sun-drenched sidewalk believing this, though I have no evidence to back it up.
This kind of thing is very Miyagi-like.
I sigh as I look for shade.
She’s inconsistent in her behavior and runs away if something goes wrong.
Perhaps because we have been spending more time together, I am gradually becoming more and more like Miyagi. I don’t want to think that we are becoming more alike. I would like to think that this is just a coincidence and that this is just for today.
Gripping my temples, I drive Miyagi away from my head.
Bread, eggs and milk.
She didn’t ask, but there would indeed be sugar.
I quickened my steps to complete a simple nap.
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