Miyagi who isn't mine — 216
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
Miyagi is selfish.
She doesn’t consider my feelings of being marked to such a place. But I’m the one who allows Miyagi to do that, and I can’t always stop her strongly.
「Miyagi, you want me to be your roommate, right?」
I catch Miyagi’s hand stroking the inside of my thigh and pull down my skirt, which is flipped up. I don’t expect her to do anything more than this, but I don’t know what will happen to my reason if she keeps stroking these places forever.
「Yes.」
「Well, then, just act like roommates do.」
I let go of the hand that had caught her after one sigh and got off the bed. Then I sat down next to Miyagi and hugged my knees.
All the things that have been done to me lately deviate from the term roommate.
Roommates don’t wear hickeys on the inside of their thighs like they do today.
I am hoping for such a thing, but that is because I am interpreting the term “roommate” in an expansive way, and Miyagi, who wants to be in that category, should not do anything that strays from it. I think I should strongly stop her.
「You’re not acting like a roommate yourself.」
Miyagi says in a slightly low voice and tugs at my skirt.
「I’m trying to make some effort to do that.」
I want to be something other than a roommate, but I also rely on the word roommate, which Miyagi needs.
Miyagi sometimes does things that are unpredictable.
I don’t know what would happen if I forced her to pull her out of the scope of the term “roommate,” so I don’t have the courage to do so.
And yet, I also want Miyagi to accept it, forcing me to expand the scope of roommates. The effort is half-hearted because I can’t help but draw Miyagi to me, who wants to remain ambiguous, and test her to turn her shimmering, uncertain feelings into something tangible.
「If you made even some effort, you wouldn’t try to get me to lick your feet or make me lick your feet.」
「You got away with that much, so that’s good. This is still a consideration.」
If allowed, I would like to push Miyagi down on the bed and put my lips all over her body. I want to touch all of Miyagi without reserve and spend the same time with her until morning, but I respect her wishes by putting to bed the impure feeling inside me.
To be precise, my lack of courage is holding my reason together. So please don’t try to make me forget my lack of courage and skip my reason.
I’m aware of my unreasonableness, but I’m not the only one who does unreasonable things.
「…What were you really going to do if you got away with that much?」
「I’ll tell you if you want me to. Do you want me to?」
「You don’t have to say it.」
I stared at Miyagi as I heard what I could only describe as a disgruntled voice.
「You can wear a kissmark, but at least let me specify where.」
The marks that have been put on me so many times have become something I take for granted. It bothers me when it’s there, but it bothers me when it isn’t there. If she put a mark again on the same place that was marked earlier, I would want her to stop because I would expect something more than a mark, but if it’s in a different place, I would want her to put it in a different place.
「You said it wasn’t a kissmark.」
「Okay then, a mark. Let me specify where to put it.」
「…Where would you like it to be?」
「Where would you like to put it, Miyagi?」
I asked quietly and a hand reached out and snuggled into my neck.
「I had marks on my neck at the school festival, didn’t I? It stands out here.」
「Here is fine.」
「Is there a reason you want it in a prominent place?」
「…Sendai-san is mine, so I can do what I want with you.」
With a voice, the hand that had been attached to my neck leaves and Miyagi’s lips attach instead. Slowly, the skin is sucked, automatically deciding what clothes to wear tomorrow.
This ritual, which is difficult for me to defy, is something that her words make me want to willingly give myself to.
It feels good to be told by Miyagi that I am「hers,」as if she is telling me that she likes me.
I know those are one-sided words from Miyagi, who has no intention of becoming mine, and I know they are not sweet just because they seem sweet like chocolate, but I want her to say them again and again, and I want to hear them again and again. I would be willing to be marked in a prominent place to get that word.
I brush Miyagi’s hair as she buries her face in my neck.
The black hair falls from my fingers and is sucked hard against my skin.
I wonder how long these marks will remain.
As I was thinking about this, her lips parted and Miyagi’s fingers stroked the mark that would have been made.
「Miyagi, can I mark you too?」
I catch the fingers crawling on my neck and ask a question I know the answer to.
「You can’t.」
「I know. Because Miyagi isn’t mine, right?」
I released my grip and touched Miyagi’s earrings.
I trace the plumeria flower and kiss her ear.
The earrings were chosen for Miyagi’s happiness.
It’s definitely different now from when I chose these earrings.
Miyagi doesn’t want to be mine, but she wants to make me her own. That’s a big step forward and makes me feel like I and Miyagi are getting closer. So, that’s fine.
I can forgive Miyagi for not liking me, but I can’t forgive Miyagi for liking anyone but me, and the closer I get to her, the less I can forgive Miyagi for not liking me, let alone Miyagi for liking anyone but me.
However, we can still maintain the status quo.
I think so, but I would like something a little more tangible.
「Miyagi. If you claim me as your own, you’d better manage me properly.」
「Manage, what? Do I have to manage you, Sendai-san?」
「Yes, it is. You should make it more obvious that I belong to you, Miyagi.」
「What do you mean?」
「I mean if you put a collar on me again.」
「I’ve never made you wore a collar.」
「I’m sure you did.」
I get up and bring the accessory case from the top of the chest. Then I took out the pendant that Miyagi gave me.
「You haven’t forgotten this, have you? The collar Miyagi put on me in high school.」
Holding the chain and showing it to Miyagi, a small ornament with a moon motif swings.
「That’s not a collar, that’s a necklace.」
「It’s a collar. That’s what I meant to give you. Here.」
「…What makes you think that?」
「Come on, why not? Why don’t you ask your own chest?」
I poked her around the heart and her hand slapped me with a peshin. Miyagi then reached for the pendant without saying a word, so I hid it in my hand before she could take it from me.
「You picked out this pendant yourself, aren’t you, Miyagi?」
When I show her the hand holding the pendant, she responds in a gruff voice.
「Yes, but…」
「Then pick out earrings for me.」
「Why are we talking about that?」
「I don’t think I would like to wear these again. If Miyagi can pick one out for me, I can have it pierced.」
「I didn’t ask you to wear a necklace, and I wouldn’t pick earrings either.」
「So how are you going to manage me then?」
「That…」
Miyagi clammed up and dropped her gaze.
Is she aware of it or not?
Now, Miyagi did not deny the word “management.”
I think that means she really wants to manage me, and the word “mine” includes that meaning.
「I can give Miyagi all of me, but it would be unfair for me to just give and not get anything. You don’t have to buy anything, you should at least pick out some accessories.」
Reach up to Miyagi, stroke the earring and tug on the earlobe.
I offered the option of an accessory, but I don’t care if it is a real collar if that is what Miyagi chooses.
「…I just have to pick the right earrings, right?」
Miyagi looks at me with reluctance in her voice.
「Only that.」
I smiled, and Miyagi drank my barley tea, which was supposed to be lukewarm.
