Volume 1 - CH 15

TRIGGER WARNING: Graphic Content

It was wholly Armanu’s right to choose a galtir. Both the galtir and the challenger had to lay down their weapons and were not permitted to use ngak so that they could be certain about whom Armanu had chosen, and the only weapons they were permitted to use were the golden branches that were known as Armanu’s Fingers.

Normally, the younger and stronger of the two would become the next galtir if they only weapons permitted were tree branches, but Armanu’s choice was never that simple. Kiros, the current galtir, had killed the previous galtir and become the Guardian of the Forest when he was just twenty, and he had ruled over the Golden Forest for forty years since.

Dozens of priests had challenged him during his reign. Some of them had broken off Armanu’s branches in broad daylight, while others had tried to assassinate him in his bedchambers inside the temple in the dead of night. But none of them had managed to kill Kiros.

He had been chosen by Armanu even after his glistening golden hair had turned brittle and white, and the priests had stopped challenging him altogether after conceding that he possessed Armanu’s wholehearted favor. This had lasted ten years.

The galtir also broke off a golden branch and brushed off any stray twigs. Everyone else took a step back, then another. The priests were taut with nervousness and watched with bated breath because this was the first time that anyone had challenged the sitting Guardian of the Forest in front of so many people.

Galtir Kiros was ashen-faced as he walked up to Gishzida and extended his arm.

“Haah!”

Two branches of different lengths clashed against each other and shook. The galtir’s branch was longer, while Gishzida’s branch was shorter and thicker. Their duel was closer to a melee involving punches, kicks, and other blows associated with hand-to-hand combat because the golden branches began breaking after just a few blows and were not very useful as weapons.

But neither of them let go of their respective branches. After all, their victory would not be determined by the physical outcome of their fight but by Armanu’s choice.

The priests and the believers held their silence in terror as they bore witness to the duel. Gasp, gasp, gasp. The galtir’s breathing was terribly ragged, and cold sweat was pouring down Gishzida’s forehead.

There was no way that the galtir could best the younger Gishzida with physical strength alone. But Gishzida was also unwell because he had recently been flogged. He hadn’t even had the time to properly rest and recover, the wounds on his back continued to fester and grow feverish, and it was still difficult for him to move his burned arm freely too.

It was hard for Gishzida to remain on his feet because the wounds on his back reopened with every large movement he made and because the galtir was targeting his back specifically.

He grew dizzier as the wounds on his back opened up with an audible pop every time he moved too much, and blood began pouring down his back. Gishzida glowered and gritted his teeth. Even the sunlight felt like a blade being scraped against his back. He could not let this drag out for too long.

“Haah!”

The galtir’s long branch shot toward Gishzida’s chest once again. Red droplets of blood splattered everywhere as a wound appeared on Gishzida’s chest as if a knife had sliced him. Gishzida took one step back, then two, as he pressed down hard against the wound.

……I knew he was using silent en.

Gishzida raised his head and looked straight ahead as his lips twisted oddly. The galtir charged straight at him while brandishing his branch.

“Die, Gishzida!”

Suddenly, Gishzida threw the branch he had been holding at the galtir. The branch swished through the air and planted itself squarely in between the charging galtir’s ribs. Several people in the crowd gasped. The galtir, who had been running toward Gishzida in an attempt to bash in the latter’s head, crumpled to the ground.

“C-cough, cough, G-Gishzi…….”

Gishzida flipped over the galtir, who had fallen on his face, with his foot and pulled free the branch that had pierced his lungs. The galtir’s blood vessels were audibly ripped apart as blood gushed from his wound. Cough, hack, cough. His white beard was quickly dyed scarlet. Smash. Gishzida then drove his branch through the galtir’s neck and twisted it as he whispered in the galtir’s ear,

“I guess none of the bastards who challenged you before managed to figure out that you were using silent en. But I’ve known ever since I was seven.”

“……G-gasp, hack.”

“And that’s why I’ve been practicing how to use silent en too for the last ten years —all in preparation for this moment.”

He heard the galtir gritting his teeth.

“……Did you think……it was only me?”

The dying man’s lips twisted. His lips began moving behind his bloodied beard. Gishzida narrowed his eyes and he read the galtir’s silent sneers.

Every galtir has used silent en. I used it, and so did you. And so too will the next galtir after you. No, technically speaking, it’s only those who know how to use silent en who have a chance at becoming the galtir in the first place.

Armanu’s choice? What bullshit.

Kiros bent his head back and laughed soundlessly.

There was a wintry look on Gishzida’s face as he pulled free the bloody branch. Kiros’ head was severed from his body as if he had been decapitated by a blade.

Gishzida had noticed that the galtir was deceiving everyone by using silent en for a long time now. It was said that anyone who used other weapons or manifested ngak during the duel would be cursed to die on the spot for defying ‘Armanu’s choice.’

But Kiros, who had secretly been using en, had always been the survivor of any duels he had been involved in, as had been every other galtir before him. Each galtir had begun their new lives as the Guardian of the Forest by learning that Armanu’s curse held no power.

“Thank you for all your hard work until now, Kiros. May you rest in peace in Armanu’s embrace.”

Gishzida was neither smiling nor did he seem excited as he dug out the fallen man’s heart and held it high in the air. The crowd began stirring hesitantly at first, but it eventually broke out into a loud cheer.

“Whoaaaaaa!”

“A…a new Guardian is born!”

“Armanu’s Fingers had chosen a new Guardian!”

Gishzida ripped apart Kiros’ still-twitching heart and scattered its pieces around the tree. Galtir, Galtir —the loud cheering rippled all throughout the forest like a wave.

Anyone who became the Guardian of the Forest lost their old name and was only called ‘Galtir.’ This was because the galtir must live only as the Guardian of the Forest and Arnamu’s spouse.

The priests and believers who were gathered there roared loudly as they welcomed the beautiful young man who had just become the new Guardian of the Forest. Armanu would surely give them more of her blessings and bounty if her spouse was young and full of virility.

The new Galtir, who was covered head to toe in blood, climbed up the altar and spread open his arms as he loudly proclaimed,

“We will continue the ritual for Armanu! Sound the drums! Place the sacrifice in the wagon!”

Boom boom boom boom, dum dum dum dum. The people became entranced yet again as the beating of the drums grew quicker. Jada’s corpse was placed inside the wagon, and the priests who had been nearby pulled the wagon instead of the beautifully decorated horse that had pulled it before.

The wagon slowly began circling around the forest. The priests standing near the wagon took the corpse’s blood and sprinkled it over the earth, and they tore off chunks of the corpse’s flesh and tossed them to the believers. The believers flocked to the wagon as it moved in order to catch the pieces of Armanu’s body, which symbolized grace and was the proof of her blessing.

The new galtir stood atop the altar as he looked down at the scene with no emotion on his face. The people looked like a horde of demons as they swarmed around the wagon, tore of chunks of the corpse’s flesh, and stuffed it in their mouths. Nothing about what was happening suggested a perfect union with Armanu. The corpse inside the wagon disappeared in no time at all as Gishzida quietly looked down at the plaza, save for her bright red bones, her hair, and scraps of her white clothing that was now dyed in the brilliant color of blood.

“Sound the drums!”

The drums began beating loudly once more. The people chanted Armanu’s and Kittu’s names as they began singing in chorus. The incense was being burned again, and its scent permeated the plaza to the brim, and the people who had seen the sacrifice’s blood began jumping around in excitement.

The full-scale madness had begun.

***

“The galtir didn’t cast that ngak on you. The sacrifices are Armanu’s body……so the g-galtir can’t cast any ngak on them…….”

It was Minnè who was blocking Renier’s path. Minnè had seemingly died instantly after being hurled against the rocks, but she had managed to keep her life by casting defensive ngak just before the attack had landed.

But she had broken several bones, and her consciousness had faded in and out because of how much blood she had lost. She had watched quietly like a corpse, with her bones still broken, as Gishzida murdered Jada, her friend and colleague, in cold blood, and then she had cast floating ngak on herself after he had left and had just barely managed to catch up to Renier on horseback.

“All the galtir did……was to mark you as a sacrifice to the forest. The one who shackled you by filling the brand with a ngak…….”

“Shackled me? ……Lady Minnè?!”

“Was none other than Gishzida.”

Minnè, who had been desperately holding out on the horse, eventually tumbled to the ground. She continued,

“I saw him……casting a ngak over your brand. What did he say when he was casting it?”

“He said that there was a curse on my brand that would melt my heart if I left the forest, and that he cast a ngak over it to delay the curse by three days. He told me hide for now and come back later…….”

“There is no such thing as an en that can delay someone else’s ngak. Did his en sound something like……Tab……Guea Esh Anba?”

Renier opened her eyes wide as she nodded back. How did Lady Minnè know? Heh, hahaha. Minnè threw her mouth open and cackled. Then, she said,

“I knew it —he shacked you at the first chance he got. Yeah, that’s Gishzida for you. He’s as wise as the Black Dragon, as cunning as a snake……and he’s skilled at secrecy and deceit……. That’s who Gishzida is.”

“What are you talking about? Lord Gishzida isn’t that kind of person!”

Renier shook her head furiously. She knew that Lord Gishzida loathed mudpeople, but she was also certain that she was precious to him and that he cared for her. This was what Renier chose to believe.

“You foolish thing. Do you know……what that en even means? It means, ‘to manifest three days later.’ It’s a ‘fire ngak’ that’ll kill you after three days. You’re a mudperson, and yet you trust a Fundamentalist whose hatred for mudpeople runs deep inside his very bones —you must be out of your mind…….”

Minnè’s speech was gradually growing slower. She continued,

“Gishzida’s greatest……skill isn’t his ngak but his ability to scheme and manipulate people. Shouldn’t that be obvious……seeing that he’s managed to climb to such a high position despite being the galtir’s greatest nemesis?”

“What do you……?!”

“He’s amazingly skilled at using other people’s weaknesses and guilty consciences against them, and he’s more than capable of concealing his hatred and smiling seamlessly if he needs to. Did he not perfectly manage to hide his hatred of mudpeople before you, and did he not show you the wounds he suffered for your sake whenever he stood to benefit from doing so?”

“No, L-Lord Gishzida, he……he wouldn’t do that do me.”

“Then again, you girls adored Gishzida without question —it was astounding, really. None of you ever realized that he put you under our care because of how much he hated dealing with you lowly mudpeople.”

Minnè snorted even though she was struggling to breathe.

Renier opened her eyes wide as she observed Minnè.

It’s not true —Lady Minnè must be lying,

Renier desperately denied Minnè’s claims. Or at least, she tried to. But there was nothing she could do about the fact that something cold was beginning to seep inside her heart.

Lord Gishzida may have been endlessly kind and gentle, but he had still tried to pretend that he’d gotten her pregnant without telling her, and it was true that he, who she knew harbored a deep-seated hatred for mudpeople, had suddenly started acting like he’d turned over a new leaf out of nowhere. It was also true that Renier’s guilty conscience had strung when she had seen his injuries earlier.

No, that was just coincidence. He didn’t do it on purpose!

Renier could not deny it no matter how hard she tried. She had most certainly heard the words ‘Tab Guea Esh Anba’ coming out from Lord Gishzida’s mouth. If that en really means that my brand will ‘manifest three days later’…….

……But why? Why would Lord Gishzida do something like that?

Renier’s lips were quivering. A sharp voice began screaming at her that she mustn’t trust him even though she desperately wanted to.

It would’ve been so much easier if she could just believe that Lady Minnè was lying. But the shivers running down her spine felt too ominous. Renier slowly and hesitantly walked up to Minnè, helped her sit up, rested Minnè’s head on her arm, and, with a tremble in her voice, asked,

“B-but Lady Minnè, how did you know……that the ngak he cast on me was a fire ngak?”

Minnè began cackling eerily as she rested her head against Renier’s arm. Renier endured her laughter for a very long time before she finally answered,

“I have the same ngak cast on me. Several other people have that ngak cast on them too. Galtir Kiros cast them on us a long time ago.”

What on earth? Renier was partially stunned as she leaned closer to hear the words that kept flowing out from Minnè’s lips. Minnè continued,

“The galtir branded……the priests who were his closest guards with the same brand used on slaves and cast a fire……ngak on our brands. So that we could never betray him or run away. Do you really think that someone who lusted after the galtir’s position like Gish……zida wouldn’t have learned about something so good?”

Renier’s eyes opened wide as her gaze trailed down to Minnè’s chest. Her outer garments had been singed here and there because of Gishzida’s attacks and her front was open, so it was easy for Renier to find the brand on her chest when she looked down.

Renier’s lips quivered. I can’t believe this. How is this possible? I may be a mudperson slave, but the priests are Celestials, and Lady Minnè is an en-nugig. Even the galtir shouldn’t be able to do something like this to a high-ranking priestess. There was a tremble in Renier’s voice as she asked,

“Why did you let him do this to you, Lady Minnè?”

Minnè hesitated for a moment, and then she slowly closed her eyes and steadied her breathing before she calmly replied,

“We…our sin was that we loved Kiros……and that we trusted him. We believed that he would never dance to the Fundamentalists’ insane tune……and that he would rule realistically and mercifully and bring prosperity to the Golden Forest. I severed my blood ties and abandoned even my own self for him.”

Oh, oh gods.

“We were sad that the galtir was destined to a life of solitude……and that he was suffering so much because of his doubts, and we hated the situation for making it so that he couldn’t accept our love and loyalty and so that he couldn’t trust us. That’s why…….”

Renier had to stoop down lower and lower because Minnè’s voice was gradually growing as quiet as a mosquito’s wings.

“Then, will I have to come back here after three days and never be able to leave the Golden Forest again?”

“That’s your choice to make. But……what I can tell you as someone who fell victim under the same curse before you…”

Minnè shivered as she continued speaking until she began coughing up blood. Her injuries were apparently worse than they appeared. But she stopped Renier from trying to wipe away the blood and desperately continued,

“We sincerely loved Kiros and tried to protect him, but he wasn’t able to trust us after he became the galtir, and he wasn’t able to break free from his dreadful loneliness either. Because we were also priests, and that meant that we could also become the galtir at any time. And we were good at killing too.”

Renier lamented. Their emotions were so unbelievably bizarre and twisted. The mistrust and the horrible solitude that accompanied the position of the Guardian of the Forest was particularly unbelievable to her.

“Then, why did Lord Gishzida cast the en on me, Lady Minnè? There’s no reason for him to do that…….”

Minnè opened her eyes and asked,

“Did you…make him some kind of promise?”

……A promise?

Yes. Renier had made Gishzida a promise. She had done so twice, in fact. Renier lowered her head and gritted her teeth as she recalled what she had promised him. Minnè’s words were making everything slowly fall into place. Renier felt like the inside of her head was melting like butter.

“I promised him that……I’d protect him……with my life. That I’d give him my life and the rest of the time I have to live in repay the debt I owe him…….”

“And there you go. You walked into his trap yourself, just like we did! C-c-cough!’

Minnè laughed through her coughing as she clutched Renier’s clothes. Then, she continued,

“Gishzida knows fully well about the solitude and mistrust that has ruined so many galtirs. That’s why he chose a mudperson, and not a priest, to guard him from his side. He chose you because you have special feelings for him and you’re highly skilled, and most importantly, because you can’t challenge him to become the galtir yourself.”

“B-but there’s still no reason for him to do this to me……. There’s no way that he would…….”

Minnè ignored Renier’s pitiful protests and simply continued laughing.

“Ha, c-cough, haha, to think that Gishzida of all people would decide to keep a mudperson by his side —what a sight to behold.”

Renier grabbed Minnè’s bloody hand as she swallowed back her sobs. She couldn’t believe any of this, nor did she want to. But why would anyone lie so urgently when they were about to die? Renier didn’t know. She really didn’t know anything. Renier clenched her jaw and frantically shook her head, and Minnè took a ragged breath and began moving her lips again. She said,

“I’ve seen the fire ngak……that Gishzida cast before. The ngak the galtir cast on is only one color, a light brown, but Gishzida’s ngak was two colors —crimson and brown. You should……check your chest later. Though I doubt that you’ll want to believe what you see, even until the bitter end.”

“Lady Minnè… Sob, ahh, what, what should I do if you’re right? How do I free myself from the fire ngak?”

She could barely hear Minnè’s voice anymore. Most of Minnè’s voice just sounded like the wind now because it was so mixed into her raspy breathing. Renier frantically tried to understand what Minnè was trying to say by reading the latter’s lips.

‘There are only two ways to free yourself from the fire ngak. The first, is to stay here in the forest forever and live in hiding until the day you die, and the second, is to cross the Naaru River near Ninurgal City and go to the Northlands.’

“The Northlands?”

‘Yes. The twelve beastmen tribes live scattered amongst the Whitesalt Mountains in the Northlands.  They say that we Celestials’ ngak can’t manifest in the land of the beasts because the land is dark and barbaric.’

“But Lady Minnè, it takes three days to get to the Northlands even by horse.”

‘Take my horse. You might be able to make it within three days if you ride north all day and night long.’

“T-then, does that mean that I’ll have to live in the Northlands for the rest of my life?”

‘You could also wait until the person who cast the ngak on you changes his mind on his deathbed. I know that you want to believe that person is Kiros, but…….’

Renier was so bewildered she thought she might go insane. Who am I supposed to trust when the person I want to trust and the person I need to trust aren’t the same person? Minnè vomited more blood as she smiled and continued,

“Jada and I, we……we pitied you girls. That’s why……we tried to give you the best lives we could before you had to die, but we also tried so hard not to love you. We……were afraid that any warmth we showed you would make you r-regret your deaths even more.”

“Lady Minnè…….”

“It……hurt so much to send you girls to the ritual. So it makes me so glad to see……that you managed to survive.”

“Lady Minnè! Lady Minnè? Please pull yourself together, Lady Minnè!”

Renier grabbed Minnè’s hand and began sobbing. Minnè raised her shaky hand and placed it on Renier’s head. Her feeble breathing suddenly became rapid. And, with her final breath, Minnè gave the very last, most ardent, and longest blessing of her life.

“May An of heaven, Ninhursag, the merciful mother, Enlil of the air, Enki of the earth and the tree of life, Nanna of the moon, Utu of the sun, and Inanna, the goddess of harvest and war, protect you from the clutches of greedy Armanu and the Kittu the Fallen…….”

“Lady Minnè! Sob, sooob! Lady Minnè!”

Renier hugged the dying priestess tight and wailed. Her tears mixed into her nausea and made a mess of her. Minnè’s final blessing flowed from her lips.

“Never step foot in the forest again, and may you find peace.”

***

Renier reached the Naaru River, which marked the boundary between the Southlands and the Northlands, just before her three days were up. Behind her were the Ghana Plains, the granary of the north, and vividly before her eyes were the Whitesalt Mountains, which stood so tall that they seemed to hold up the sky itself.

Her waist and buttocks hurt so much she thought they were going to shatter, and she couldn’t feel them properly. She had ridden donkeys before while herding sheep, but this was the first time she had ever ridden a horse for such a long stretch of time. The horse, which had been racing for three days straight, shook its head as it breathed raggedly.

Renier thought that she was going to be driven crazy by her doubt that going to the Northlands was truly the right thing to do now that the Naaru River was right before her very eyes. She bit down at her lip as she muttered,

“What do I do? Do I really have to go to the Northlands?”

She didn’t believe that Lady Minnè had lied as she lay dying, but she also still fervently wanted to trust Lord Gishzida.

Renier knew without a doubt, thanks to the kiss he had given her as they parted, that the depth of Lord Gishzida’s feelings for her exceeded any ‘favor he had for his favorite slave.’ How much had someone as noble and arrogant as he had to endure before he’d finally acknowledged his own emotions?

Renier stood at a loss as she found herself in front of the small boat by the riverside. He only did it because he likes me so much. Because he couldn’t bear to lose me, because he wanted to make sure that we could meet again.

Lady Minnè wasn’t lying either —she was probably just mistaken. He told me to come back in three days. And I promised him that I would. Shouldn’t I go back and see if what Lady Minnè told me was true for myself?

Should I turn back, even if only now? Where will I live if I do? Will I have to stay by Lord Gishzida’s side forever, in hiding and never able to leave the forest again?

“Ahhhh!”

Her thoughts were cut short. Renier fell off her horse when her chest suddenly began hurting so much it felt like something was stabbing her.

“Argh, ahhhh! It hurts!”

Renier clutched her chest as she rolled around the mud. She felt like the red-hot iron was searing her chest where the brand was again.

Renier’s mind grew dark when she realized that the ngak had manifested. Shit! This is how the ngak manifests? Renier gnashed her teeth and pulled down her clothes to check her wound.

“……It’s really……two colors?”

The brand was glowing in two colors, crimson and brown, through the scabs that were beginning to form as it burned her flesh. She felt like a long and dull spear was skewering her brain.

I tried so hard to convince myself that Lady Minnè was lying for past three days.

The pain only grew worse as time passed. She pressed down against the brand, wet it with water, rolled around the dirt, and bit down at her lips so hard they bled —but nothing made the pain go away. Her tears were flung everywhere every time she whipped her head from side to side as she flailed.

……I need to suffer through this agony for three whole days before I finally die?

She suddenly snapped back to her senses. The hesitation that had tormented for the last three days evaporated in no time at all.

Maybe it’s true that he loves me. Maybe the emotion that only just managed to sprout in my fearful heart shares the same name as his.

But if he planted this agony inside me in order to make me go back, then I don’t think this is love. If I have to go back to him in order to be free from this pain, then I don’t think that’s love either. It’s not love when a slave succumbs to their master’s whip and gets dragged away.

But then……how is the way that Lord Gishzida tricked me and placed this curse on me any different from the dirty men who tried to subdue me with their fists?

Tears welled in Renier’s eyes as she came to a realization that hurt her as much as the vivid pain itself.

I let myself get dragged around by Goddess Inanna’s oracle because I’m just a helpless mudperson, but that doesn’t mean I have to love her when she torments me.

Lord Gishzida’s no different. And I won’t let there be two Goddess Inannas in my life.

“Sob, ugh, L-Lord Gishzida, ugh, ahhh…….”

Renier hugged the horse’s neck with one hand and pressed hard against her burning chest with the other as she gritted her teeth. She couldn’t tell which one hurt more: her chest or her heart. It was just…her chest hurt, her heart hurt, and everything else hurt too.

Tears poured down Renier’s cheeks as she used the ferryboat to cross the river. She used the headdress that Gishzida had given her to pay the ferryman.

The Whitesalt Mountains, which seemed to pierce the heavens, felt so close to her now that she’d crossed the river. The pain in her chest slowly started to fade with every step she took toward the mountains. But the agony that was surging from within only grew worse and worse.

— Come back within three days. I’ll figure out a way for you to be able to live here safely before then.

— I’ll come back after three days without fail.

— I should be the only apologizing to you. I shouldn’t have bought you that day. You have no idea how much I……. All this time……I’m truly sorry I was never able to tell you.

— I’ll come back to repay this debt without fail if I manage to survive today. I’ll give you my life and the rest of the time I have to live in return for everything you’ve done for me, Lord Gishzida.

Renier buried her face in her hands and wept as she walked toward Salt Mountain. It took over a day to walk to the mountain even though it looked so close, and Renier wept for three days as she walked toward it.

She prayed for her disgusting tears to wash away any feelings she had left for him only to learn just how truly powerless her tears were. She pressed down against the pain that had transferred from her chest to her heart as hard as she could, but she still ended up crying for a very, very long time before she could finally stop thinking about him.