Chapter 51 Guilt For Killing Lyra

Zoravec headed upstairs to his room and slammed the door shut behind him. His legs trembled this time since he was alone and it allowed him to be a vulnerable version of himself. Zoravec was torn between mind and heart now as he slumped against the door and sat there.

He closed his eyes with a heavy feeling in his heart, Zoravec had no clue how he was going to face both of them later on. But one thing was certain, he desired some privacy to get a hold of all the situation. Zoravec had tried so hard to keep his composure as he talked with them downstairs.

Being alone was his only chance perhaps, when he could be the vulnerable self. No doubt he needed to think and ponder a lot because the situation itself was awkward enough to make him worried. He did not intend to leave the house since he had no other place to go. But he also wanted some distance from both of them.

'I have to…find some place. Yes, I have to leave, I can't live with her anymore.'

His words were clearly hinted towards Hecate, Zoravec was unable to even address her as mother now. It was impossible for him to stay with them under one roof, but finding another place was itself not an easy task.

'If she kicked me out tomorrow morning then where will I go?'

Zoravec instinctively thought about survival as the first step. It was obvious that now that Hecate had told him the truth and he was not her biological son. Why would she not kick him out now? Or was she keeping him for some hidden purpose?

'ɪꜰ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴀɴᴛ ᴛᴏ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴄʜᴀᴘᴛᴇʀs, ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ ᴠɪsɪᴛ Novel(B) in.ᴄᴏᴍ ᴛᴏ ᴇxᴘᴇʀɪᴇɴᴄᴇ ꜰᴀsᴛᴇʀ ᴜᴘᴅᴀᴛᴇ sᴘᴇᴇᴅ.',

Nonetheless, Zoravec was concerned about his safety and survival. He was sure that both of the ladies were no less than his doom, one wanted his body and other surely had some hidden malice towards him. Zoravec closed his eyes and tucked his head against the wooden door as he replayed everything in his mind.

'I can't believe people can stump so low. It seems revenge and love are two powerful emotions which can make a person mad enough to drive him crazy.'

He thought to himself and concluded according to the speculations he derived from the story of Hecate.

For some reason he could feel her pain and it felt bad to him, Zoravec could suddenly feel what it meant to be lonely. And it enabled him to figure out what Hecate might have experienced. Devi was no less of a victim in the situation, as per her own words the demoness could not retain physical form for long.

Zoravec knew what it meant to be in her state, he once was a victim of helplessness too. He remembered how he had been bullied in school. Zoravec could feel Devi' pain and the sense of how terrible she must have felt without her powers. Upon muddling hard he knew and could understand the circumstances and emotions under which they both used him.

,m As much as he wished he could hate them, Zoravec was unable to bring himself to do so. One was rage and revenge driven while the other was desperate to regain her powers. Both of the ladies had acted under the influence of their own powerful emotions.

However Zoravec forgot another emotion which could possibly destroy everything. Fear. Yes, fear was one of the biggest chains which could possibly make a man paralyse and imprison him mentally. That was exactly what the vampires had done to the humans. No doubts the vampires were stronger but they could be killed and eradicated.

There were plenty of ways humans could possibly kill them all and clean their realm. But again the thing which was supposed to be dealt first was mental imprisonment. Humans were unable to rebel due to the fear of death and slavery as blood bags. The vampires cleverly put forward the rules and regulations which mostly benefited them.

'',

They were shrewd, clever, vile and murderers. Zoravec was still in disbelief that he had the same blood running in his veins, it made him feel disgusted and heavy. He snapped, opened his eyes and looked down at his arms and hands. He could see the blue and green veins visible from his wrist portion and the sight made him feel dirty.

"I can't believe I belong to those beings. I am…I am one of them!"

He whispered to himself while looking at his pale whitish hands, Zoravec was still in disbelief about the whole stealing story. It drove him to the edge that he was not what he thought he was. It was not possible for him to see the world as he used to, everything was changed even though the human realm was the same.

"Hah! I still can't believe it, I am a vampire."

Zoravec felt like dying inside as he was unable to keep himself calm. Everything felt dirty to him now, even his own self felt impure to him. How could he digest that he belonged to the race who was known for being murderers? He laughed hysterically upon recalling whatever had happened and it enraged him regarding the whole thing.

He was not able to keep himself sane while imagining all those terrible things the vampires had done to the humans. It was simply not possible for him to relate himself with those vile creatures. There were multiple emotions Zoravec felt in that one moment. Rage, disgust, helplessness and inability to think about the future was also somewhere lying in his subconscious mind.

"Wahaha, I am also a murderer. No wonder! No wonder, I killed her."

He recalled about Lyra, the first woman he ever shared intimacy with and killed her. [From chapter 1] Zoravec blamed it over his vampiric blood which actually was not false at all. The death of that human was actually the result of excessive blood sucking and the venom.

Zoravec knew what the venom meant and now he could possibly comprehend what and how Hecate's husband must have tackled all that stuff. But what troubled him emotionally was the fact that he was a vampire too. It made him feel terrible physically and emotionally, considering that too had killed somebody.