CH 193

New memories with Sendai-san — 193

Translated by KaiesV

Edited by KaiesV

A round cake with a candle.

Searching through old memories, I find a similar scene.

On my birthday in the distant past, my father was away for work, but I still have a picture that my mother took of me.

Candles and smiles on my face.

Photos that complement my dim memories are sealed in the album.

This is Sendai-san’s room, and my mother is not here.

What do I look like now?

I see Sendai-san holding up five candles on a white cake with strawberries on top.

She didn’t tell me to look happy when we were eating the food we had prepared together, nor when she brought the cake to my room. So perhaps, just maybe, I’m sure I don’t look so grumpy.

「I guess, I should have bought a number candle.」

On the other side of the cake, Sendai-san, who seems to be in a good mood, says in a serious voice.

「This is fine.」

「Really? Nineteen is a candle, don’t you want to stand it in the middle?」

「You don’t have to stand it up.」

The five candles that came with the cake are fine, and there is no need for her to go out of her way to buy numbered candles.

「I see. Okay, I’ll light a fire.」

Sendai-san lit one candle and then another.

All five candles were lit, and the flame wavered.

Sendai-san had promised me that she wouldn’t make plans for my birthday, but I couldn’t believe her words about eating a whole cake together. I was still suspicious when Sendai-san left the house saying she was going to pick up the cake she had reserved.

Maybe she wouldn’t come back.

I couldn’t calm down because I was thinking about that.

But now the whole cake is in front of me and the candle is lit.

「I’ll turn off the lights.」

I hear a bright voice and I stop Sendai-san from reaching for the remote control.

「You don’t have to turn it off.」

「Why? I was thinking of singing a song too.」

「You don’t have to sing, and you don’t have to turn off the lights.」

「I was going to show you my beautiful voice.」

「I don’t need that kind of thing. I’m going to blow it out now.」

It’s all too over the top and I am no longer the kind of kid who enjoys being sung to. Besides, the more Sendai-san tries to make my birthday seem like a birthday, the more I want to open the album I haven’t opened for a long time. It makes me want to add Sendai-san to a page of the album and create a new birthday page.

「Here you go.」

Sendai-san says quietly, and I take a breath and blow out the candle to blow out old memories.

The flames on the five candles go out, and the smell of wax makes the back of my nose hurt. I didn’t want to cry, but I felt my vision blurring and I squeezed my eyes open once.

「Happy birthday.」

「Thank you.」

Sendai-san puts away the candles on the cake in a small answer to the cheerful voice.

「Miyagi, how many pieces of cake do you want me to cut?」

「I’ll leave that matter to Sendai-san.」

「We’re going to eat the whole thing, so I could cut it in half, but that’s just too wild.」

Sendai-san groans「Nhn—」and starts to wonder whether she should choose four or six. Then, mumbling and muttering, she leaves the room, saying she’s going to get the knife.

I rub my eyes and look at the cat chopstick rest in the corner of the table. The three cats have been placed in different places every time I came to the room, but recently the table top seems to be their place.

Just as the tortoiseshell and black cat who watch over the meals we eat in the common space have grown accustomed to chopsticks, the three cats appear to have grown accustomed to Sendai-san’s room. It’s a relief to feel that this is one of the evidences that my gift is well-liked.

I stroke the beehive cat’s head with my fingertips.

It’s hard and smooth, unlike the stuffed black cat.

Three cats, side by side, turned upside down.

While I was doing this, Sendai-san returned and I hurriedly put the chopstick rest where it had originally been.

「It seems that if you warm up the knife, it cuts cleanly, so I warmed it up. It said to keep the cake cold, but it’s been a little while since I served it… I wonder if it will cut nicely.」

Sendai-san sits across from me and looks at the cake with serious eyes. Then she took a chocolate message plate with『Happy Birthday』written on top of the cake and placed it on my plate.

「That’s for you, Miyagi.」

When she said that, she didn’t hesitate to stick the knife into the middle of the cake.

「Eh, from the middle?」

「That’s what it said.」

While answering my voice, Sendai-san doesn’t take her eyes off the cake, but pulls the knife from the center toward the outside. The same thing is repeated four times, and the cake is divided into four equal portions, two on each plate.

「Well, I guess that’s as far as I’m allowed to go.」

Sendai-san says with satisfaction.

It’s not as beautiful in cross-section as the cakes sold in stores, but it is much more beautifully cut than the cake I cut as a child.

「Itadakimasu.」

Our voices overlap and we both put our forks in the cake and take a bite.

The whipped cream and fluffy sponge mix and melt in your mouth. The tartness of the strawberries accentuates the taste and makes you want another bite right away.

「Is it delicious?」

Sendai-san’s voice replies,「It’s delicious.」

I take a second bite and drink my iced tea.

「I see. I’m glad.」

I shifted my gaze from the cake to Sendai and our eyes met, even though we had no intention of meeting.

「What is it?」

I ask Sendai-san, who seems to have been watching me, and she smiles at me.

「Miyagi, I thought you seemed to be having fun.」

「Sendai-san seems to be having more fun, though.」

「Well, that’s because birthdays are supposed to be fun.」

Sendai-san smiles and eats a strawberry on top of the cake. The fork scrapes the cake once, then twice, and one of the two pieces disappears into Sendai-san’s stomach. After I had one in my stomach, I broke the chocolate message plate in half and bit into one.

「…Sendai-san, did you really enjoy your birthday the other day?」

「Like I said when I came back earlier, thanks to Miyagi, I had a great time.」

「Is it true?」

「It’s true?」

「Did your friends celebrate it with you?」

「Well, yes. But that’s the same for Miyagi, isn’t it?」

Yesterday, Maika gave me a gift along with the words「a day-early.」Ami called me and my college friends also celebrated my birthday. But I think Sendai-san celebrated twice as much as I did.

「Same here… but… did they congratulate you… or were they college friends or something?」

「Yes, they do. And some friends from high school.」

「Ibaraki-san?」

「Yes.」

「Are you still in touch with her?」

「With Umina?」

「Yeah.」

「I do. She wants to meet me in the winter.」

I had never heard of it before.

Sendai-san had never said a word about such a thing before.

There is no need or obligation to bother to tell me that she was in contact with Ibaraki-san. And I have no right to interfere with Sendai-san’s friendships.

I know they are friends, and I know it’s not crazy for Ibaraki-san to want to see Sendai-san, but I feel as if I’m being pushed off a cliff into the ocean.

「You’re not going home, right?」

I ask as I crumble the second piece of cake with my fork.

「I’m not going back. If we can’t see each other and the relationship is broken, then that’s the end of it.」

Sendai-san says simply and without hesitation.

I don’t want her to choose to leave to see Ibaraki-san, but there is so little hesitation in her voice that I feel almost pity for her.

Sendai-san and Ibaraki-san seemed to get along very well at school. But when Sendai-san started coming to my house, I realized that it was only for show.

There is no doubt that the two of them are friends, but I don’t think they had the same depth as friends do.

Sendai-san used to bring magazines to my room that Ibaraki-san liked, but she didn’t read them avidly. Now, she doesn’t even buy those magazines.

「Sendai-san.」

「What is it?」

「When we were in high school, you used to buy magazines that Ibaraki-san liked. Don’t you buy magazines like that anymore?」

「I don’t buy it because I no longer need it.」

Sendai-san says as a matter of course.

She can cut the world into pieces without hesitation, like a cake, apparently. Surely she can separate what she cut up into necessary and not-so-necessary pieces, just as we separate garbage. She must be willing to change the shape, like cutting up a round cake into triangles.

At the aquarium, Sendai-san cut the otter face on a pancake without hesitation. When we made cookies, she easily rolled the dough into one in the shape of a cat.

She will break the previous form without resistance if necessary.

Seeing Sendai-san like that makes me wonder how long she can stay in her current form, and I fear that the day will come when I will be abandoned.

I let out a small breath and then bring the cake to my mouth.

White cream, yellow sponge, red strawberries, it was delicious.

On my birthday, which comes only once a year, I don’t need to think about trivial things. I crush the shadows that slowly consume my mind with this sweet and soft cake.

「If Miyagi wants to read it, I’ll buy the magazine again.」

Sendai-san asks in a soft voice.

「It’s fine. I’m not reading it.」

With a fork, I brought the cake to my mouth.

I eat it slowly, savoring it, and lock half of the round cake and the message plate inside my body. I looked at Sendai-san and saw that the cake was gone from her plate as well.

The promise is kept and the round cake is never put away in the fridge.

It disappears into our stomachs without a piece.

A table full of hot food and a whole cake.

I think I am happier on my birthday than I have been on birthdays up until last year, when I ate everything and nothing was left over.

It’s alright.

Sendai-san cut the cake, I didn’t do it myself.

It was also not me who disappeared from the table.

That’s why, it’s alright.

「Miyagi, what kind of cake do you want for your birthday next year?」

「Whatever you want.」

「Okay, same size whole cake as today.」

Sendai-san chuckles.

Next year is too far away to believe in promises.

Still, I would like to think that next year will be the same as this year.

「So, here’s my present for you.」

Sendai-san says in a light voice and takes a not-so-large bag from under the bed and hands it to me.

「Thank you.」

Unusually for Sendai-san, who seems to be particular about such things, I received a simple bag with no ribbon attached.

「Open it now.」

I did as I wad told and take out a small box-like object from the bag. But what I hold in my hand isn’t a gift at all, and I find myself staring at Sendai-san seriously in surprise.

「What is this?」

「Don’t you recognize it?」

「I know what this is, but I don’t know what this means.」

What came out of the bag.

It’s something I have seen in the past.

I bought it and gave it to Sendai-san, which is very memorable.

Something I would never forget.

But Sendai-san doesn’t need it.

She didn’t want to use this.

「I’ll give you my ears, Miyagi.」

Her pleasant voice puts the items out of the bag on the table.

The same piercer that pierced my ear.

It was Sendai-san’s birthday present to me.
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