I want to see Miyagi as always — 247
Translated by KaiesV
Edited by KaiesV
Hands that are joined don’t stay joined, and vacations always end.
The more time you want it to last, the sooner it ends.
Maybe it’s because my mind keeps getting caught up in the winter break, but I don’t feel like college has started when I walk into the lecture hall. Instead of motivation, I sigh. It doesn’t make much sense that I came to the university early.
「Ah— I should have taken today off.」
I don’t plop down at my desk, but I can’t stop the backward words from coming out of my mouth. Miyagi also started university today, and although there was no one at home when I got home, my heart kept trying to go home.
「You’ve been unmotivated from day one. It’s rare for you to say something like that, Hazuki. Did something happen?」
Mio, who is sitting next to me, says in a tone that says she’s amused rather than worried.
「I wanted winter vacation to last forever.」
「Did you want to work more part-time or something?」
「I thought a part-time job would’ve been nice, but I wanted to go out a little more.」
「What-what? If Hazuki, who doesn’t go out much, says that, do you have someone you wanted to go out with? Or maybe you got a boyfriend during the winter break?」
Mio’s eyes sparkle and she leans her body toward me.
Her interest is directed toward the wrong side.
A topic that is troublesome and hard to believe even if you misrepresent it.
I pushed the shoulder of Mio who seemed to take the conversation in such a direction and took a little distance.
「I met Mio at my part-time job and you know I didn’t have a boyfriend or anything. I just wanted to have a little more fun, that’s all.」
It’s true that I don’t have a boyfriend, but I would be lying if I said I didn’t have someone I wanted to go out with.
I wanted to go out with Miyagi.
More, and more, and more.
I wanted to go out and play so much that this short winter break wasn’t enough.
「Isn’t there really someone in particular?」
「There is none. I think we’re done here.」
「Well, I don’t mind if it’s over. Ah, by the way, you said you went to the zoo with Shiori-chan, right?」
Shiori-chan.
The uninteresting call I heard seemed to lower my voice, so I consciously made my voice higher and let it out.
「We went there.」
「Do you have souvenirs?」
Mio smiles a big smile and holds out her palm.
I told her about my trip to the zoo with Miyagi when I met her at our part-time job. Naturally, I also told her that I didn’t have any souvenirs.
「I thought I told you the other day that I didn’t have any.」
「Maybe you just forgot about it. It’s okay to remember that you have a souvenir, okay?」
「I didn’t forget, and the zoo isn’t far enough away to buy souvenirs.」
「Pictures, then.」
「Pictures?」
「Show me the pictures you took at the zoo. You promised me when we were working part-time.」
Since the photo was mentioned in between part-time jobs, I promised to show it to her later, but I never did.
「Okay, but…」
I took my phone from my bag and displayed the pictures. Then I handed the phone to Mio and showed her my memories of the zoo, and immediately I heard a subtle voice that couldn’t be described as either stunned or troubled.
「Hazuki. Did you take Shiori-chan to the zoo by force?」
Only Miyagi’s friends were allowed to call her Shiori, and Mio wasn’t included in that group. Of course, I wasn’t included either, but there was no way Mio could call her the way I wasn’t allowed to call her, so I squeezed my hand under the desk.
「That can’t be true.」
My throat tingles at the names I can’t call her.
I want to blame Mio for her chumminess, but if I tell her not to call her Shiori, she is bound to ask me why. As I am only Miyagi’s roommate, I don’t have enough reason to convince Mio. Therefore, I cannot say anything.
It’s better to keep quiet than to be questioned by Mio as to why or why not.
「Shiori-chan looked like she’s in a bad mood.」
I cover my ears for the name-call I don’t want to hear.
It shouldn’t matter so much who we call whom. Friendliness and distance are not measured by what we call them.
I don’t call Miyagi Shiori or Shiori-chan, but we live together and kiss. We even do more than that. In terms of the depth of our relationship, it’s deeper than Mio. There is no need to compare them. I know that.
Therefore, there is no need to measure.
We can just call each other roommates.
「She just seemed to be in a bad mood. In fact, she looked happy. Besides, I’m sure there’s a picture of her in a better mood.」
Miyagi wasn’t in a good mood to look at that day, but she seemed unusually happy. Although Mio may not be able to understand it, that kind of Miyagi is still on my phone.
——I felt uncomfortable when I looked back at the pictures after returning from the zoo, even though she was supposed to be there. She didn’t look as happy as I had expected.
I have been fooling myself into thinking it was just my imagination, but it may not have been.
I look at the phone I gave to Mio.
The screen shows Miyagi, who is not grumpy but not in a good mood.
Miyagi seemed a little strange that day.
She kept asking me what my favorite animal was, and she was different from the usual Miyagi. Maybe she was dissatisfied with me.
What complaints?
I don’t know. If someone says that discomfort is just an imagination, that’s what I think it is.
「Ah— Well, it looks like some of the pictures look a bit fun… But more importantly, aren’t there too many pictures of Shiori-chan?」
As I was sinking deep into the sea of thoughts, Mio’s voice brought me back to reality.
I cover my anxiety born during the winter break with a smile.
Facial expressions create emotions.
Smiling makes you happy and anxiety disappears.
「Really? Wouldn’t you take at least that many pictures when you go to the zoo?」
When I answered in a cheerful voice, Mio looked at me with a face as if she were looking at a rare animal.
「Don’t you usually take pictures of animals too?」
「I’ve taken pictures of them. Penguins and polar bears.」
My phone properly stores everything but Miyagi.
「There is, but isn’t there something wrong with the number of photos? Ah, what is this? Is this shoe… shoerock?」
「Shoebill.」
I correct Mio’s mistakes as she continues to mumble to herself while looking at the pictures.
「Oh, that’s it, that’s it. Wait, aren’t there too many pictures of shoebill? Hazuki, do you like them?」
「I didn’t even know it existed.」
「I knew it. I’ve never heard the word “shoebill” from you, Hazuki. Then, what’s the reason for this amount of pictures?」
「Because I’ve grown to like it.」
Miyagi’s favorite shoebill has become my favorite as well.
I have come to like many other things that I had no interest in before.
Miyagi lets me say I like a lot of things. I think he will continue to add more things I like, but I don’t want questions like the ones she asked me at the zoo.
What animals do I like the most and what animals would I like to see again.
The animals I like the most or would like to see again.
When asked about such things, I cannot prepare an answer that would satisfy Miyagi. In the first place, I don’t even know why she would want to ask such a question.
Why.
Why would she want to know such a thing?
「It doesn’t make any sense.」
Mio said as if she was speaking for me and continued,「Hazuki, you’re not interested in animals like the civet, are you?」
「No, that’s not true. Photo time is over.」
I take the phone away from Mio.
Miyagi’s inexplicable behavior is not something to be concerned about. She is an inexplicable person by nature, and a person who does a lot of unreasonable things. It’s not surprising that there are things I don’t understand.
I’m sure they probably are.
But I want to see Miyagi as soon as possible.
As long as we can be together, that’s all that matters. There are many things I want for her, but the most important of them is to be with her, and as long as that is fulfilled, I can turn a blind eye to other things.
「Oh, right, Hazuki. Are you free today?」
As I put my phone away in my bag, Mio asked me in a cheerful voice.
「I’m trying to get home early, though.」
「Eh, that’s cold. You didn’t even play with me over winter break.」
「I met you when we were working part time.」
「I know, but sometimes you just have to pass the time.」
「Hopefully I won’t be too late home.」
I don’t mind taking a detour, but I don’t want to cut off my relationship with Mio, so some compromise is necessary.
「Hazuki, is there anywhere you want to go?」
「I don’t mind where you want to go.」
「Sometimes I go with you to places you wanted to go, Hazuki.」
「I have nothing in particular, I guess.」
「You always says that, aren’t you, Hazuki? Well, it’s fine. Oh, well, can I go to your house? I’d like to see Shiori-chan.」
The smiling Mio seems to have no other intention. I think she really wants to see Miyagi, but it is not a very interesting story.
「I haven’t cleaned up my room, and Miyagi gets home late, so can we do this another time?」
My room is tidy and Miyagi isn’t home late.
I don’t want to lie too much, but I think I have no choice because I don’t want Mio to come to visit me.
「Then call me when you’ve cleaned up. If possible, when Shiori-chan is there.」
「I’ll do my best to clean it up.」
As I smile vaguely back at Mio, who laughs and says hello early, the lecture begins.
Today is a long day.
Play
Unmute
I attend lectures that never seem to end, eat lunch, and attend lectures again in the afternoon. After finishing everything I had to do at the university, I went shopping with Mio. When I sent a message to Miyagi that I would be late and had dinner with Mio, she invited me to go to a live concert next time, but I softly declined and went home.
「Sorry, I was late.」
I call out to Miyagi, who is washing dishes in the common space.
「I don’t mind.」
「You already ate dinner?」
「I did.」
Her plain voice is the same as usual.
She is the unreasonable Miyagi who doesn’t hide her grumpiness.
I want to see the happy Miyagi, but I would prefer not to be the one who keeps asking questions I can’t answer. Miyagi, who only cares about me, is not like her.
「I see. What are you going to do now?」
「…Touching.」
「What is?」
「Sendai-san.」
I don’t understand.
While I was thinking about it with many question marks in my head, Miyagi, who seemed to have finished washing the dishes, came to me. Then, she put her hand on my chest.
「Eh, what is this hand doing?」
She didn’t feel guilty.
Her hands do not move, but softly cover my chest over my clothes.
「I thought you said you didn’t want me to do that.」
「I was just surprised.」
「…What would you not like if someone did this to you?」
Miyagi says something I never thought she would say.
This is not the very nice Miyagi.
「Nothing, I guess.」
I kissed Miyagi before she could say anything else, because I was afraid that if I let her talk any longer, she would say something that would make me feel uncomfortable.
